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The illusion of Impending doom. Throughout many times in my life I can recall a moment when I had a feeling of impending doom. Do you ever remember a time when you said, "Oh shit, we're screwed." Or even better, did you ever say, "Oh shit, I'm fucked." Or when you where younger, you may have said, "Oh man, I'm a dead man." Or, "I'm in big trouble." No matter how you said it, do you remember the feeling of impending doom. Meaning that you are fine now but you are "totally screwed" later on. I want to emphasize that it was all an illusion. Regardless of how I felt back then, I am fine now. If I can recall back in my lifetime every time I felt I was doomed, I can see that it was never really that bad. When I was a little boy and got lost from home. When I was a teenager and I caused my first car accident. When I first got caught speeding over 90 miles an hour. When I got 7 points on my driver’s license. When three police cars chased me and caught me on my motorcycle. When my financial records got audited. When I got sued and brought to court. Depending on the person, one can have the feeling of impending doom in any situation. The feeling of impending doom can cause intense worry in some people. But remember, it is just an illusion. I have lived past all of those situations and I am completely fine. I wasn't screwed like I thought I was. They were just situations that I had to get past. I'm sure there will be more in my life but now I'm sure that it is temporary, just like all those other times in my life. Yes, in most cases they are temporary. Since none of them affected me in the long term, then they were just illusions of doom.

I would rather live my life with creativity as my driving force rather than fear as my driving force. Believe it or not, a lot of people live their lives with fear as their main driving force. Sounds kind of ridiculous but a lot of people accept their situations because they are avoiding something they are afraid of. For example, many people would stay in a job they hate because they don't believe they can make enough money in a job that they love. Many people would stay in a relationship that drains them because they are afraid of being alone. Many people settle for the things they have because they are afraid they can never afford the things they want. I'm not saying people should just give up their jobs and break up with their mates and replace all of their things with new ones. I am saying some people make their decisions based on what they are afraid of. Now imagine what it would be like to make your decisions based on a goal that you desire. All your goals and dreams are based off of some creative thought. Whether you were daydreaming or wondering or even meditating, if you lived your life based on getting closer to your goals, imagine how more exciting that is to have. I would rather live my life building toward my goals rather then getting away from what I'm afraid of. I would rather live my life with creativity rather than fear. I would rather believe that I'm getting closer to what I want in life rather than believe I'm avoiding what negative thing that will happen. This is all just a matter of thinking positively an optimistically. It is great to live like this. It is just another way of living with no worry. That's because you are not focusing on fear.

Is it possible to get everything you want?
Yesterday, I watched a film developed by PrimeTime Productions entitled "The Secret". It was a film describing positive thinking and the Law of Attraction. Their belief is that positive thinking enables you to attract what you want out of life. Similarly, I read a book a year ago entitled "The Power of Intention" by Dr. Wayne Dyer. He writes that everything starts out with intention. And with intention you are able to co-create what happens in the world. Dr. Deepak Chopra wrote another similar text. His book is called "The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire" and he writes how our desires can be manifested. Since I was brought up Catholic, I was taught the power of prayer and I remember from scripture "Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find." My understanding of that phrase is that God will grant you what you need. What I find is that all throughout history and up until today, so many people believe there is a way to ask what they need from God or the universe. So, over the years, I find I have read many examples of sources that express almost the same message. The message: "It is possible to get what you want." Whether there is truth in that or not, I guess that is up to the individual to discover. But I am curious to see, why don't more people feel they have everything they want. To me, it feels like many people are always suffering. If these messages are basically the same after thousands of years, why don't more people follow them? Throughout history, I'm sure there are a number of people who feel they have been given everything they need. Whether it is people, who put their trust in Yahweh, or people, who follow the life and message of Jesus, or people who worship Allah or people who find peace from Tao Teh Ching, or people who achieve enlightenment, there have been many people who have found or developed wisdom of achieving what they want out of life. Among those who have developed the wisdom of achieving what they want out of life, there are also so many people throughout history that focus on the negative; which is obviously counter productive. I believe in one of the Star Wars movies, Yoda said that fear is the root to all evil. I think? Well I believe in something similar to that. I believe that every negative feeling is due to a fear. Depression can be due to the fear of nothing is going to improve. Stress can be due to the fear of losing something. Anger can be due to the fear being weak. Jealousy can be due to the fear of inferiority. With any negative emotion you can determine what the underlying fear associated with it. And fear is essentially the lack of trust. In other words, if you trust in some belief system, you would essentially have less fear. I guess that the reason why so many people don't follow the wisdom of their belief system is because they don't really trust in themselves or God or the universe for that matter. And the notion for having trust in a belief system is essentially having faith. So it occurs to me that the wisdom of getting what you want, is closely tied to having a strong faith in what you believe in. So whether your belief system has any proof or not, you should have faith in your beliefs and trust that they will work.

We are all connected.
The connection of minds throughout the entire world is becoming more and more evident. Communication and the sharing of ideas have become almost effortless these days. A person can share his ideas to the entire world and in turn see the ideas of many others all over the world. A person can find that many other people have the same beliefs, opinions and concepts. A person can find that their understanding of the world is similar to ancient beliefs. In ancient times, "word of mouth" or what was written down and copied by hand limited communication. Ancient philosophers and teachers would spread their beliefs to only the people that lived around them. Yet in other parts of the world similar beliefs were developed at the same time. I see that some eastern philosophies have similar points to the Middle Eastern beliefs. I see that western religions have similar messages to Asian beliefs. Yet these cultures are not physically close, their beliefs evolve in a similar ways. Even after mankind has developed a way to produce mass quantities of copies in the form of textbooks and newsprint. And information was proliferated worldwide through the writings of papers and books. Even then, many writers develop their ideas independently from each other. I have read from many different authors that explain a similar concept in different independent ways. Writers build on the information from the ancient beliefs. Other writers build on information from other writers. I have seen Dr. Deepak Chopra take quotes from the Bhagavad-Gita, and the Bible. I have seen Dr. Wayne Dyer take quotes from the Bible and Einstein. I have seen similar concepts from the Dalai Lama and the teachings of the Kabbala. Even now, in the world of the Internet, where millions of people share their thoughts with the entire world, I can see similarities to my own beliefs. It may be a possibility that we developed our beliefs from a common source. Or another possibility is that our ideas developed independently. To give a better example of this concept, I like to use an example from the history of the cathode ray tube. A cathode ray tube is a technology that revolutionized media. The cathode ray tube is also knows as CRT which is how television displays the images. I live two miles from the David Sarnoff Research center in Princeton Junction and I was surprised to see a documentary about the history of David Sarnoff and the CRT on television. As I understand it, two inventors from two different parts of the world came up with the concept of the cathode ray tube almost at the same time. As you can see, a very significant discovery was made from two people and two totally different parts of the world. There are a number of other examples where concepts were developed independently from each other at the same time. One cannot help but wonder how did they both come up with the same concept? Can it be that they are connected? Can it be that knowledge is evolving the same way through out everyone in the world? How is it that no single person in this world can claim to be the inventor of the internet? It seems to be something that evolved worldwide. It was just people sharing knowledge with each other until it grew and grew. If it is possible that we are all connected, what is the means to this common connection? In other words, how can we connect to this knowledge when we need it? Whatever it is that connects us all together, it is still amazing to see that other people believe and think the same as you.

Intuition, Wisdom and the source to all the answers to everything.
I've always wondered if intuition is due to having a highly evolved perception or has it something to do with a connection to something that is not tangible. In other words, someone who is considered intuitive may just be highly observant to body language, voice tone, facial expression or anything that is fairly subtle to most people. Or, another possibility is that an intuitive person is connected to some source that is not very obvious, almost having a cosmic nature about it. I would ask people their opinion on intuition. Does intuition involve some kind of cosmic nature or is intuition just a form of highly evolved perception in some people? Many people would attempt to examine this phenomenon as scientific and explainable to the point they are so sure that they are correct. But for those people who know they have a great deal of intuition, don't believe it is something that can be scientifically explained. I have read explanations from people who don't claim to have any intuition, but they all believe they know the reason why others have it. I have read examples from people who have had an experience with intuition, yet they cannot give a scientific explanation behind it. (thread) So, I'm inclined to believe that intuition is not something that can be explained scientifically. One would really need to experience this phenomenon to truly understand it.
Since it is very difficult to argue the explanation of intuition, lets use our imaginations and consider this hypothetical possibility. Many people believe in a source of power that has all the answers to everything. Dr. Wayne Dyer described in his book "The Power of Intention" and on a late night PBS special, that there is a source of power that we all can connect to. In many religions one may consider this source of power, God. One hypothesis is that a moment of intuition has something to do with a connection to this source. Since this source has all the answers to everything, a moment of knowledge that is given to a person at just the right time may be caused by a brief connection with this source. So one possible explanation of this phenomenon is that a brief connection to a source of all knowledge is made which gives a person knowledge just at the right time. Imagine if this were true. Imagine that we could access this knowledge anytime we want. Imagine that everything in the world was created from this source of knowledge. Maybe the architects, the artist, the authors, the scientists all had a connection to this source of knowledge. Just maybe, accidental discoveries like antibiotics and the Internet all came from this source of knowledge. Just maybe, we are all able to access this knowledge and wisdom. So, if there is a source of knowledge and wisdom, how would one have access to it? Other than using research, many people throughout history have sought answers through prayer and meditation. I don't believe that someone like Einstein developed all his theories by researching text books in libraries. I don't believe ancient philosophers like Socrates had access to the Internet. Many of the most revolutionary theories have came from imagination. Their imagination was brought out by being in deep thought. This form of deep thought can also be reached through some sort of meditation. To me meditation is like prayer. People throughout history have always respected the power of prayer. Just maybe, prayer puts people into a meditative like state. The meditative state opens the mind. The openness of the mind allows a connection to the source to all the answers. Maybe that is why prayer can be so powerful. Image if all this were true. Wouldn't one want to consider accessing knowledge and answers to everything? Wouldn't one want to develop their imagination? Wouldn't one want to have an open mind? Wouldn't one want to develop their intuition? I just described one possibly. If one were to let themselves imagine if this were true, then one would be able to develop other possibilities. If one were to be open to many possibilities, then one may determine the closest possibility. If one allows their mind to use their imagination and be open to what is possible in this world, then would that be one way to connect to all the answers? Whatever the source to all knowledge is. It maybe God. It maybe a collective conscience. But the way to connect to this source is to be open minded, imaginative and in thought.

Am I inferior, superior or neither?

It is very common for many people to compare themselves to almost everyone they meet. For many, the first thing people do when they see someone new is to determine where they are categorized in their internal hierarchy. In other words, are they better or I'm better. People will determine whether or not this person is better than one's self or not. An internal hierarchy is different for many people. It all depends on what that individual values the most. For example, if a person values the education level the most, then that person will rate other people based on their level of education. If a person values wealth, then they would rate other people based on their earnings. There can be a hierarchy with popularity, appearance, social status, occupations and so on. You see, people would generally "size-up" another person and determine if this person is inferior or superior in the internal hierarchy of their minds. You see, that's where it only exists; in their minds. And again, for each person the hierarchy in their minds may be completely different. What is so important about the hierarchy in people's minds? Do you care if people rate you superior to themselves? Will it bother you if someone considered you inferior? To many people it is important that they are considered the best or at least above average to other people. People like being thought of in high regard. People seem to feel superior if a lot of people like them and inferior if a lot of people don't. Do you really believe it is true? Do you really believe the rich people are better than you? Do you really believe the geniuses are better than you? Do you really think the beautiful are better than you? Do you really believe your bosses are better than you? Then why is it important to believe some people are better than others? The key to not feeling inferior or superior to others is by eliminating the habit to compare yourself with other people. If intelligence is what you compare yourself to others, and then you will always find someone more intelligent than you. If social status is what you compare with other people to feel more superior to yourself, then you will feel inferior to someone with an even higher social status. If your job position allowed you to feel superior over another person then you would obviously feel inferior to one of your bosses or someone who has a greater position in the work place. At one time in my life I began to avoid this habit of comparing ourselves with each other. One time I attended a party in Manhattan with two of my closest friends. Most of the people in the party were high paid New York professionals. The three of us use to work together in the same company but we all voluntarily left our jobs months before. Although I was a professional for fifteen years, I was unemployed at the time. These days when you meet a new person in New York, many of them ask what you do for work, some time at the beginning of the introduction. It is a common habit for people to use their occupation to develop a preconceived idea of the other person. People generally try to use the occupation to define the person they meet. Many occupations have common stereotypes that people use to develop their perception of another. When I was in that Manhattan party, rather than giving another person a chance to develop preconceived stereotypes about me, I believe I told them that I was in retirement for now. It was kind of true. I wasn't looking for another job. I was using that time off to travel and find an understanding of what I really wanted to do with my life. Many of the people at the party said they were either lawyers or accountants. I remember they were perplexed at my answer. They didn't get enough information to compare themselves with me so they were a little stuck. Rather than telling them what I did for a living, I began to explain to them on why I quit my job and what I was planning to do next in my life. I didn't want the conversation to evolve into what I did in the past; rather I wanted to talk about what I was going to do in the future. Many people may feel inferior when surrounded by wealthy professionals. If a high paying job is not very important to them then they wouldn't care who makes more money. If one truly believes that we are all equal then there is no need to compare one's self with everyone else. If one loses the need to compare themselves then they can focus on things that would make them happy. I was happy to talk about what I was planning to do rather than coming up with things that would impress another person. I felt free to enjoy myself in the company of new people rather than comparing each one to myself. It takes practice to believe that people are not better or worse, they are just different. If people can accept that people are just different, then they can accept people for who they are.

Eliminating the concern of other people's opinion of one's self Many people are sometimes concerned about how others percieve them. I know of many people who take great care of their image at their job. I know guys who are ready to fight because someone was looking at them in a wrong way. I witness some people who project a very strong image of themselves so they won’t be thought of as weak. One thing I know for sure is that no one has any control on how other people percieve them. Yet many people are concerned about what other people think. Or what would other people say. To me it appears to be the fear of losing respect from other people. And like many other fears, it may limit a person from making the correct decision, exploring possibilities, expressing themselves authentically and so on. It's true that a person's image is very important to them. People have been known to lie to protect it. People limit what they can do to avoid hurting it. People also have been known to boast to nurture it. Their image is how the rest of the world percieve them and that can sometimes be the most important thing. Our image was never really important to us when we were children. Our concern for our image became more important once we got older. As a teenager, we always had to appear "kewl." For many of us, as a young adult we had to appear responsible or intelligent. For many of us, as young working adults we had to appear competent. After a while we all had to appear successful. In general, for men, we had to appear strong, intelligent, charming and so on. In general, women had to appear sexy, beautiful and smart. Whatever it was, that we had to project to the rest of the world, many of us protected and nurtured it as if it was the most important thing in the world. Many people can agree on the importance of their projected image but I can see why it is not really that important at all. People’s image of me has varied in so many different ways from one person to the next. Even a variety of close friends have different perceptions of me. When I look back years at my relationships with people who know me for a very long time, I can see how their perceptions of me even change. But people aren't afraid of a variety of perceptions. They fear only the negative perceptions. They are afraid of how any negative perception can hurt them in the future. With a bad image people are afraid they would hurt their relationship with others. Maybe lose business with customers. Maybe lose a promotion. Maybe lose a friend. I can go on and on about what can happen if one were to get a negative image. But it’s like focusing on what might happen. Like creating an imagined possibility. There are a lot of people who believe that if you give energy to the negative things that may happen, then it will eventually happen. It's been called the "self-fulfilling prophecy." There was a study done to a teacher and a class of students, where a teacher was told that a certain few students were exceptional and a certain other few were not. It appeared that the students that were perceived to be exceptional got better grades from the teacher. And the students who were perceived to be not very bright got lower grades. This can be perceived that the image of one's self is important for success. But it can also be perceived that the teacher's perception was fulfilled. Either way it is still important to not focus on a possible negative image of one's self. I emphasize on "possible" negative image because it is most likely imagined. The only perception that is important is one's self perception. The self image is more accurate than any other image because a person has a greater grasp of what is really happening. For example, I have been considered irresponsible by many people. But I believe I'm incapable of being irresponsible since I have been a landlord, a manager, and a business owner for a significant part of my life. I have been called an "idiot" and have been considered stupid. I have always had a level of awareness that allowed me to be so sure of myself. People have called me a "bottomless pit" because I eat so much. But they are not aware I only eat once a day. I can go on and on. But I am more aware of my capability than others. I am more aware of my generosity than others. I am more aware of myself than others. I will never focus on what negative thing can happen if someone has the wrong perception of me. I only focus on what is good.

Offroading in the NJ PineBarrens IMG_0130.JPG IMG_0131.JPG IMG_0132.JPG IMG_0133.JPG IMG_0134.JPG IMG_0135.JPG IMG_0136.JPG IMG_0137.JPG IMG_0138.JPG IMG_0139.JPG IMG_0140.JPG IMG_0141.JPG IMG_0142.JPG IMG_0143.JPG IMG_0144.JPG IMG_0145.JPG IMG_0146.JPG

Do people cause their own suffering? Other than those people who suffer from medical conditions or terminal illnesses or incarceration, do people create their own living hell? Whether it is a customer who is screaming in agony because a package is showing up a day late. Or a teenaged girl is suffering because she is not getting any attention from her boyfriend. Or a person who hates his or her job yet continues to stay year after year. Do you believe that suffering is a choice? And if you believe suffering is a choice, is it possible to choose happiness? In Buddhism there are four truths: Life is suffering. Suffering is due to attachments. Understanding this, one can transcend over their attachments. Once one transcends over their attachments, they will no longer suffer. In other words, do some people build mountains over molehills? It occurs to me suffering can be reduced by the notion of acceptance. If one were able to reduce their suffering after accepting what happens, then is it possible for anyone to accept negative circumstances even before they happen. If someone were to accept negative circumstances before they happen, then will they suffer less. And if they are able to suffer less, when things don't work out for them, then is it still having the ability to choose not to suffer? If one can choose not to suffer, then is it also the same as choosing to be happy?