Here is my Lifetime type story...
Heroes are God, my son and my husband. Without God gifting me with my child, I would have been a statistic to cocaine addiction and promiscuity, but I chose LIFE for both of US the day I had two pink lines!!! Smiling
Sadly though after about 3 years, I gave my son to my parents(who I love so much). In those years I learned I had Bipolar mix and Borderline Personality Disorder. My son’s real father was not involved and merely paid support. My ex who I was with when pregnant was the decent family man until about 5 months after I gave birth. He became very abusive towards me and my son was a year old one time we had a huge fight and saw it. It was then I made the choice that, although my ex always did his abuse in private and NEVER towards my son..who was to say he wouldn’t turn on my baby one day, or be raised to treat a woman in such a way. So, I stayed afraid to leave and gave m child to my parents. They knew nothing of the abuse so I merely let them speculate that I was too lazy and too ’in love’ with my ex.
Oddly enough my best male friend was always there from the day one. I met him in high school and became his on/off again sweetheart. Until we both moved on in life other than online friends. He always supported me, said my decision for my son was best and never let people judge you because you as a mother gave up the one thing that I loved unconditionally and loved me back.
Five years passed and I left the abuser...my family allowed me to move home but thought my life was as significant as a roach. I was ill mentally and recovering from being abused 5 years...plus expected to be a toddler’s mother overnight. My parents merely put me down, pushed me pass my limits, let friends and family know all my downfalls, allowing them a skewed judgmental view of me as a person, as a mother. I snapped one day and left. My friend of so many years came to get me as I packed a few things and left. With my son standing there crying. I thought my heart was being torn out and thought how I let my child down again. I wanted to die!
I guess God intervened...after about 7 months of patching up my bits and pieces called a life with my family, getting therapy and my health in general taken care of, I tried once more to meet men. I went out ONE night and made some dumb decisions and almost got raped. I came home, crawled into bed and cried. His hands wrapped around me, he kissed my forehead and in his ever gentle tone asked, what happened out at the bar. I opened up to him like always, since he was my best friend, he was literally there for me all this time. Never did I do anything without him. After a few days of contemplating his mother wanted me to move. That though she loved me, it was time...my life was pretty much tolerable. Later that night I asked my friend out and if he would like to make an adventerous step in HIS life...move into an apartment with me and away from mommy. We knew we could annoy each other, knew our pet-peeves. We found the perfect place for us, strangely next to a church. We got a great price, dear and amazingly caring landlords who send you a little gift for the winter Holidays. Open the windows in spring, listen to the birds, the band practicing the bagpipes in the parking lot outside...We have our own little paradise here in the rear apartment. Walk out front and it is a different world. Well one night after 6 months living here, almost a 2 year total and a 10 year friendship, he asked the question in my living room. He even had the ring I pointed at one day...God thank you! I smiled,, smiled some more and cried a little. This man was my supporter, best friend, believed in me, my son’s best friend(who I saw more often with him around), my lover and after a beautiful outdoor mountaintop wedding with only close family and friends...my husband..
Even now because of him I have become a better person. He says it is me who does that. I know it is but without him, I don’t think I would be who I am now. We share equally, he has given me so much in life, the best I can give him is the same...a hug, someone to listen to, someone who will defend him until the end, someone who also needed help being a step dad since decided not to have children together after a horrible miscarriage brought me down very hard, plus my own son still lives with my parents(better lifestyle, school, advantages). It would not be fair to him in anyway. Instead we rescued kittens in need. Found homes or kept some.
As for what my husband is thankful for... it is and always will be...God! That he was given a purpose in life and sent here to be my other half in life.
~Moon~
