TaunyaLynn's blog: "Thinking"

For one day we all think everything is always going to be okay, that today is going to be a wonderful and glorious day and then suddenly to our tormented eyes, one person, one sick person takes the lives of many. To be shot one by one, I ask myself, what made one person kill and wound so many. These children haven't even lived their lives and yet they only had a short time on this earth. Why? Why did such good people have to be taken. It breaks my heart in two and my heart bleeds for all. No one ever knows what to say in times like this, there never are easy words to say. But I will say, that I hope everyone at Virginia Tech knows that the Country is mourning for them and the close friends or family they have lost. I am sorry you had to endear such a horrific act. I would do anything for any of you right now. My prayer? May everyone find solace, which won't be for a while, but may God be there for you all when you fall and shed wounded tears. You all are in my thoughts and prayers. May your horrific visions, nightmares and pain fade to the start of your own way of healing. May your anger and the questions of why be switched to calm and true answers. Know you all have a shoulder to cry on no matter where you are throughout the world. I know what it feels to lose a loved one, as I lost a 6 mo.old baby years ago, but never in my life could I imagine what you all are endearing. Your guardian angel is watching over you and all that sadly parished are watching over you all always and forever are in your hearts. My thoughts and prayers go out to you all. God bless you all. Love ~ T

Okay so women lie just as well as men, or do we? I honestly think it is 50/50, look at society today, we are who we are and "you choose" decisions in what you do, no one makes those decisions for you. You are held accountable for your actions, but do we accept them most of the time, I don't think so, but yet that is "my" opinion. Actually with all the dates I had been on since my divorce, I heard the same story over and over from men and is as follows: I went on a date with this chick, we hit it off, things were going great and then 3 months later, boom, she turns psycho or just acts totally different than what I had seen in those months. I have seen those as I have met some of my friends g/f's and it holds true. But it also holds true on women meeting men. So wouldn't you think it is an even keel? Thing is, I don't think people truly and honestly get to know that person long and deep enough, they just jump into it full bolt. Also, don't pretend you are someone you are not. I mean, one of my friends really like this girl he met on a dating site, she was hot in her picture, but he took a picture of when he saw her and she really didn't want to meet in person and I could see why. She wasn't who she said she was today. That was her back in college. How do you expect people to appreciate the person within when you lied to them begin with? I mean come on. People look for inner beauty and also honesty from people. One thing harder is gaining that honesty and trust back once you knocked it to begin with. If you can't love yourself how do you expect people to love you? One thing I have learned in my years of redefining who I am and relearning me since my divorce is that if you can't wake up, look at yourself in the mirror and smile and tell yourself I am happy with who I am and what I am, that I am a beautiful person, how do you expect to make it through the day? You should be able to do that everyday. Yes we all have our moments, but if there isn't one day and you are hurting that bad inside, then something is wrong within and you need to gain that strength back. If I can do it from where I was, trust me anyone can do it. I have been through hell and back again, but at least today after all those struggles I can hold my head high and be proud for where I am today regardless what anyone else thinks. And I hold true to what makes us weak, ALWAYS makes us stronger! You know in dating, there are certain rules that everyone should follow and it holds true in my book I can say that. One, if you have been married or have dated someone for a long stretch of time that was truly serious and you are no longer together, you should wait a year before being in a relationship again, that is a fact. Because in all honesty? It is all about sex and it won't last. 9 times out of 10 that is true. Some may, but not many. I didn't believe it at first when I was told that statement, but it held true. Now back to the original subject, women lie just as good as men and not all in both sexes do, I was just frustrated that day and had to vent.....lol Trust me I know some sweethearts and would never call them that, but some (yes both sexes) just know how to get the feathers in a whirl so to speak. I shall end here for now cause I still am not feeling well.....so you all have a very happy Easter, although it is a week away. Have a wonderful Psalm Sunday. :)

Love is a funny thing. We all go through phases and we all go through emotions, but why is it that when one pours, the rain just falls deeper and deeper? I mean of course women are more sensitive then men or are we? Is that a true fact? How can one true person who is 3000 miles away from another be that in love and truly 100% grasp ahold without someone tearing it apart? Well I guess it is what you put into it, at least that is my view and opinion. You always hear the comment, times heals all wounds. I say that is true. But as they say, you should wait a year before grasping hold of another during a breakup. I agree, but man was that hard.....lol. I think the hardest part was and is the longing of being held and just feeling safe. But hey, what makes you weak always and will make you stronger. As each day progresses, you just raise that head higher and higher and take in the true goodness of nature, friends, animals and most of all family. May each day be a wonderful day in your life and nothing less. For we all should be happy and loved. Are you? If not, well remember there is one person praying and thinking of you out there in this chaotic world.

What a day...... For one day, you think there would be no stress in our lives, but to our dismay it eventually just appears. As some of us say in those moments in our lives, "Serenity Now" My serenity? That would be the power of music. You know in all the years that I wanted to become a music therapist, I can fully everyday understand why. Stress......lol. Do you disagree? If so, ask yourself, doesn't your mood change depending on what you listen to? Music is my therapy. Singing is my therapeutic drug. It lifts me like no other....is it as great as sex to me? Hell yeah. Music is my inspiration, it lifts me, it moves me, but most importantly it makes me happy. It should for everyone. Of course sex is on a totally different level, but just remember, music is sometimes involved in those acts of pleasure. How some can be happy without music, I don't understand and could never fathom, mainly because it is a part of my heart and soul. I would be a lost child searching her way back to find that therapeutic pleasure. With that, may you all be empowered with the beauty and spiritual power of music.

Now we all know that most men like to watch strippers and I, a while ago, asked a few women if they too like to watch strippers, but women. Now yes they are very beautiful to look at, but of course some women think they are trash, which I think it isn't fair "if" they go to watch men. What is the difference honestly? But that is my opinion. If a woman can dance, yes I like to watch. They are beautiful. Why my g/f and I go sometimes. My other g/f, why I asked, is because she used to be a stripper and I was curious to everyones views and opinions. But in all reality, I just had to ask that one question, as I was sitting here pondering that thought............... Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

As time passes, I grow fonder and yearn more for that one touch. As time passes, my heart bleeds and aches. As time passes, the days grow longer and longer. As time passes, there is nothing I can do, but sit and wait. The feelings that yearn through of wanting and needing seem to over take what should be. I can't help, but long so much for his touch, his breath on me, the feelings of tenderness that overcome every inch of my being. Yet so far away and although in time he will be at hands reach, but to grasp hold will be a life time away, will it be?

A vision is a view Space is a moment of peace Calm is where relaxation starts and you are blessed with the beautiness of what God has layed before you Tears are emotions of what we feel but also they are at times the goodness that has been brought to our lives My vision? Well at this moment, it is the longing to be held, loved, treasured and respected, as I do everyone in life. My tears? They are tears of hurt from what I thought I had. My calm? It will be there, but at this time there is none. Never forget those who help you because sometimes when you least expect it, those people come far and few between, just like true relationships. Those people are the ones that should be held in the depths of your heart and treasured like a prescious flower. Those are the people I myself will never ever forget. They are the ones I love so much, but also feel very blessed to have in my life.

Love is but a whisper. Seduction is nothing less than a wonderful gift. How you fill my body with so much lust, it kills me. Everday that passes I stop, close my eyes and I can feel your soft hands brush across my soft, supple skin, making me shake in thoughts of you next to me. You are my need, my want, my every desire. I close my eyes, feel your body on me, pressing against me as you start to udder but a word in my ear, making me hotter and hotter. You know just the right touch, just the right words. You tell me how much you need me in your life, that just one touch, one breath or look I give, sends desires you have never experienced before through your whole mind and body. You look into my eyes, your hands move to my hips, I kiss you deeply, seductively. We both moan to the touch. You brush your hands across my face and through my long soft hair; I am at your mercy baby. You turn me around, kiss the back of my neck, as you know that one touch sends desires through my whole body, making me yours. You push me on the bed, facing you. You lay on me softly and slowly, kissing me. Your hands brush across my breasts, squeezing, pulling, tugging, learning everything that makes me tick. I push your right hand to the nape of my neck, as your left hand moves to that one spot that you know forever is yours to keep. You squeeze my neck ever so lightly to make me hot, as you move your fingers slowly in circles, deeper inside, making me wetter and wetter till I arch my back up and shake to the moment of giving you my warm, but very sweet sugar you so desire and want to taste. You pull me up, enter my mouth, knowing how much I love the taste of you, deeper, faster. Giving you everything that will make you feel satisfied and you are, I know what makes you tick baby, you deserve that and then some. I will always pleasure you the way you have me. You look deep in my eyes and say no no, not just yet, so you push me back, roll me over and make love to me like no other. You are the only one who knows fully where and how I like it. You soar feelings I have never felt through my being. You grab my hair, pull me back and take me, making me fully yours. Then my neck, and we at that moment become one with eachother, deep, never wanting to let go of this feeling. Telling eachother we love one another always and forever. Someday I know these thoughts will be reality and once that day comes it will truly be a blessing and nothing less than heaven. You are my dream, my sun, the air that I breathe, but most all you are the one true being I trust and want to spend the rest of my life with. My whisper back to you baby is I love you forever and always. I know deep down you are mine always and no one can ever take that away. I will never hurt you, never do anything to make our love for one another disappear. You are my soul mate, that my love comes once in a life time. Passion is one that doesn't come naturally, it is one you learn within you. If you can't make love to yourself, how can you fully make love to a mate and enjoy it to the max? Ask yourself that, it is an awesome feeling. It is not one that just happens. As we get older it grows stronger and stronger and the wanting, well I know for me it is a need, as it always has been. But it is one I learned within me as I got older. Take time to know oneself and you would be amazed not only sexually, but mentally where you can go even with mind over matter. It is truly nothing less than an amazing feeling and a gift.