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Laughter is my heroin.
Jersey pizza kicks New York pizza's ass.
tongue twisters will keep me laughing for a good hour or so.
I would rather drink pee than sit in traffic for more than 10 minutes. (i did it for 5 hours this past september-sat in traffic not drank pee)
airplanes are the devil.
i like that girl with the juicy couture. I want to eat her with a knife and fork.
snowboarding is the best. in colorado. so is mountain biking.
I never call off work....i just called off work.
I am a native Houstonian. I miss Texas sometimes.
I am the life of the party in person but awkward on fubar. (I'm not* new - give me some more* time)
making out with pretty girls is even better than snowboarding.
If a camel spits at me i don't even care i'll spit back.
I have a new friend and his name is bond....jose cuervo bond
That's my sandwich.
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my bday is in January 
