~ The Hormone Guide ~
The Hormone Guide
Women will understand this! Men should memorize it!
Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
~DANGEROUS: *SAFER: **SAFEST: ***ULTRA SAFE :
~What's for dinner? *Can I help you with dinner? **Where would you like to go for dinner? ***Here, have some wine.
~Are you wearing that? *Wow, you sure look good in brown! **WOW! Look at you! ***Here, have some wine
~What are you so worked up about? *Could we be overreacting? **Here's my paycheck. ***Here, have some wine.
~Should you be eating that? *You know, there are a lot of apples left. **Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that? ***Here, have some wine.
~What did you DO all day? *I hope you didn't over-do it today. **I've always loved you in that robe! ***Here, have some wine .
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Forward this information to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh...
and men who need a warning.
And remember: Money talks but Chocolate SINGS
Peace.
