moonchild's blog: "Thanksgiving on a lonely stomach"

My heart feels so heavy..for you out there who knows me not...My grandfather died in Nov...my cat of 17 and a half years..Nov...my husband of ten and a half years...left me for a 23yr old whore...now it looks like this year..Nov...I will be foreclosing on the only house I have ever truly called home...

I long to close my eyes and never open them again...I long to be released from my pain....I long to let go of the suffering ....when the hurt and fear/////pain and suffering is gone then I will know I am truly dead...

Why must we be alone when others are around .. The hole in my heart getting bigger by the day..they say the holidays are the worst..they are so very right..my sons are gone I am alone..I put around in my house alone..wishing for friends..knowing there are none...wanting a family...knowing I had one...hope is lost...nights are long...pretty soon...with luck I will be gone....