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What are you waiting for?

I stand at the threshold
of the Devil's doorway.

The wind
from a pair of tiny
flapping wings
could push me
in either

direction.

I stand in awe
of God's creation.

His light illuminates
a path
His stars shine down
upon us
His wrath

is coming.

Coming
For
Me.

I am an outcast
of love
it has alienated me
in all its glory
and good intentions.

It has taken advantage
of my
mind

and soul.

The Devil is in
the details.

Love lingers
in the details
the forgotten cracks
and crevices
the unexplored regions
of hate.
Opposite sides of the same

Blade.

Do alleged murderers
locked up in their iron cages
feel the tugging in their
gut
when they think about
the one
who got
away?

In a world of domes
where is
a cube supposed
to find acceptance?

follow the tinkling
of glass on glass
music on the heart
screams against metal walls
of whats trapped
inside of you.

There you find
the only one
who truly

accepts.

For all the acceptance
gained
you must live with
all the foul play
and all the lies
The cruelty
the hate
the love lost
and paradise

never found.

after 4 years of memorizing everything about you, down to how you like to fuck and where you like to blow your load...the way you like your coffee, the way you take your eggs. i have to learn everything over. i have to memorize a complete strangers likes and dislikes. i don't want to do that. i want to have my list, and know it by heart, so that i know you by heart. i don't wanna know anyone else like that. you are the only one i need to know like that. i laugh at your racist jokes because i think they are funny. i let you call me woman because i know what you mean is beautiful. who else do you know who will tell you she likes you fighting because it turns her on? its all over in the time it takes to read one god damned text message. "its not you, its me. i'm sorry. goodbye courtney..." you walk of with an ache in your heart. i crawl off with only dust left of my heart and free flowing tears to mark my trail.
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14 years ago
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