Duuuuude's blog: "Some Craziness from my brain"

Friends.


    Of true friends, I have very few.  I am a friendly person, but I keep the real me closed off from all but a select few.  I can count true friends with less fingers than one of my hands.  You can't truly be friends with someone until you let them in.  Yes, that means they can hurt you like no other, but if you never expose yourself to hurt, you will never feel the joys that come from it.  On the sage advise of one of truest friends, I am working on opening up more, sharing things that I have never shared with anyone, before. My personal writings, that go straight from brain to screen, with no filter.  Nothing more honest than stream of conciousness, writing.  But its not something I ever shared with anyone before, I would usually read them a week or so later, then delete them.  Or, I would not bother to save them in the first place, lest someone find them, and see my soul set to words.  No more.  I am going to start sharing the real me.  Who I am without walls, or guards.  I will probably be hurt, but I am sure the new true friends will more than pay that back in Joy.  I am tired of being alone, because I keep everyone at a distance, instead of letting them in. eventually they fall away, and move on, staying friendly aquaintances until we eventually lose touch, because I could never let myself open it.  This is going to be a big step for me, I have never been good at expressing what I was thinking or Feeling, only occassionally letting a poem, or a short writing out to friends.  It might just be words on the screen to some, But what I will be exposing is my soul.  I do not follow any plan when I write like this.  No form, design.  Simply straight from brain to screen, unedited, except for typo's, which i do sometimes leave in, because I dont want to altar the original.  I am taking the advice of one of my best friends, and doing something to get out of my rut.  This is the first step, trying to shift the wagon out of the rut, and back onto the road.  Some might not see anything in the writing, some may just laugh, and I will laugh with them.  But the ones who see it for what it truly is, those, I will welcome in, share everything, and seek the joy of a true friendship and kinship with.

Joshua Adam Strong
April 22nd, 2012