First of all I want to say thank you to everyone who sent their thoughts and prayers when I announced that my sister was pregnant and having trouble.I am sorry I didn't get around to replying to anyone who responded to my message. My sister lost the baby around 3:00am on the 15th. We took both her and the baby to the ER. The sack and baby came out together. We still have know clue how far along she was. We did look at it before they came and took it to the lab though and we could tell where the head was and could see an arm starting to form. It was very tiny still. She was supposed to go to the OB today and for some stupid reason they cancelled her appointment and didn't even tell her until she got there. Anyway, I am taking this a lot worse than she is. It doesn't seem to be bothering her much. Me on the otherhand, I am extremely depressed. I just want to sleep, I don't want to do anything. I just want to be alone. I keep seeing that tiny once was life laying inside that sack, and its driving me crazy. Some of you know that I had some really big news I wanted to share and was not able to. Well I guess now I can and then you will understand why its bothering me so bad. My sister was not ready for another baby, and she wanted to get an abortion. It was suggested to her that instead of having an abortion, she go ahead and have the baby and let me adopt it since I can't seem to have any children of my own. She agreed to it and I have been so excited and happy. I was finally going to be a mommy, something I have wanted for years. I was going to get to name the baby and everything. But that dream got taken away from me once again. This makes two babies I have lost now. And this one is hurting me a lot worse than when I lost the one I was carrying. I actually got to see this baby. I didn't get a chance to have an ultrasound when I was pregnant. And when I lost it, I didn't know when I passed the baby. Anyway, if I am not around, or you write me and I don't reply, please don't take it personally. I'll be back sometime, I just don't know when right now. Take care,
Randi
