Odinsson5150I do not mean to brag or anything but, god damn, I am pretty.
Not just like Ewan McGregor or Jude Law pretty, but like Kate Beckinsale pretty. I know, I know, in front of a mirror it is all well and good, you got to deal with shadows and shit, but standing still, I cut a very handsome figure. Also, to quote Ani Defranco "I have the kind of beauty that moves."
I have a visage so stunning I make women preganant. when I move through a room, I leave trails of vapor that intoxicates even the sternest critics. My eyes melt butter, iron, graham crackers, and silly putty. I dance like Stevie Wonder and I blush like Betty Boop. I am just all-around Kick-Fucking_ass... We are all pseudo-vampires dying of thirst and searching for the next great food-coma. We will take anything to hold off the wolverines inside our souls. The greatest battle of our lives takes place everyday on the wasted space of our subconscious and the inner-most workings of out tragic lifestyles. We spend and fuck and eat an