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risks of the heart

we have no choice who we love....even if we fight against the feelings eventually we are doomed to lose, resisting maybe gives you time to get to know them better but in the end you are at the mercy of the other person. unfortunately the wind can change, they can become scared by thier own feelings, sadly but no less painful they can die. there is no way to prepare for anyof it, and really no way to prevent it should it happen. you can live you're life alone and miserable or you can subject yourself to the mercy of another and hope for the best. you can try and say next time i will go in with my eyes open, but you are still as blind as the next person, pain strikes when you least expect it...you can choose to go on, or you can let it crush you. i have chosen to live and fight through the pain evntually i will heal, though my heart will always belong to her...
yeah this isnt funny or whimsical i'll make another blog for my poetry and fun stuff this is all about me just blowin off steam, and venting against spoiled inconsiderate people that have no regard for other p;eoples feelings and cant see past the end of thier noses. so when my gf dumped me 3 weeks ago for no reason other then she wanted to fuck as many guys as she could spread her legs for we had an agreement that we would try and be friends and stick it out since we couldnt afford the rent alone. neither one of us would bring home other people...she promissed she would never do that to me. less then 3 weeks later she brings a friend over....ok i can handle that...then after i got bed i hear movin around in the front room and walk out to see then getting very cozy together on the floor..... to spare the drama we had an arguement and she moved him in the other room where i had to listen to them fucking. i broke it down to her let her know excatly how she made me feel...she says i should just get over it omg its been like 3 weeks i should have forgotten about the woman i loved and took care of for 2 years by then and it should be ok for her to bring her little fuck toys into the house and throw it all in my face. bullshit.... she spent the night somewhere else 2 days ago and came home we were gettin along fine then she goes out and brings her little fuck toy back again last night....after everything that happened the first night knowing it still hurt me seeing her with other people IN MY HOUSE.. i really could care less what she does when she isnt here i just dont want it thrown in my face? is this too much to ask? i mean really am i out of line? should i have just forgotten everything and be over it all in 3 short weeks? if you accually read my bitching feel free to comment and lemme know what ya feel, if not well wateva....
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