sumguynamedj's blog: "Resume"

Objective:

World Domination followed by benevolent leadership.

Experience:

I've been to a lot of places.

I've seen a lot of shit.

I can drink a LOT of vodka.

I am very fluent in shotgunning beers.

I am very skilled at using my tongue during sex.

I am very proficient in Diablo II Lord Of Destruction.

I am seriously addicted to Final Fantasy.

I can masturbate very quickly.(I'm done)

Achievements:

I beat Diablo II Lord Of Destruction countless times.

I've beaten Final Fantasy more than anyone you know.

I've beaten every version of Zelda.

I have a Level 32 Bard Wemick in Dungeons & Dragons

Education:

I graduated high school as a probationary requirement. 

I dropped out of college cause it gets in the way of drinking.

I am currently a student of the school of hard knocks.

References:

 Fuck your problems.