JUST GOT THIS IN AN E-MAIL
It's frustrating. You just cashed your check, paid rent, paid the electricity, bought the weeks groceries, the phone bill, gas, daycare, cable, internet, diapers, wipes, and whatever else came up this week, you walk out of the grocery store and someone is sitting there with their hand out, asking you, a total stranger, for money. Why should you give them money? You still have to go home and take out the garbage, wash the dishes, put the kids to bed, and pick up the house. By the time that your work day is over, it's ten o'clock and you have just enough energy to go to bed. Day after day this continues, but you keep working, doing your best.
Have you ever stopped and considered what it feels like to have to ask a stranger for their money? Do you think that panhandlers don't know how hard it is to work and pay all the bills? Do you really believe that they aren't trying to take care of themselves?
I am now a stable, self sufficient family man who is lucky to have a beautiful home, wife, and children. I never let a day go by without giving thanks for what I've been able to do for myself and my family.
However, after my parents split at 11, and my mother (who I was living with) kicked me out for being too much like my dad at 16, I was homeless for six long years. I tried to gt jobs, but without a shower, phone to call me, address to put on an application, clean clothes, a hairbrush, etc. it's not as easy as all that. I went to labor ready every morning at 5 am as soon as I was 18. I would go out maybe once or twice a week, and make about $30. I tried to find someone that would rent me a room, but without a solid job, that's basically impossible. I went to shelters when I could, but they are mostly run by churches who insist on you being there by seven o'clock each night. If you aren't there in time, you're out of luck. I went to soup kitchens, but they usually only serve food once a day. I tried food banks, but if you don't have a home to put things, a box of food doesn't help.
So I panhandled. If you've never done it, try it, just once. Swallow all your pride, sit on the side of a street where you are in the ultimate position of humility and rely on the goodness of others to eat, clean your clothes, get a shower ($5 at the YMCA will get a day pass and you can use the showers) Just once try sitting there in the cold and rain, feeling completely hopeless and helpless, just to hear person after person tell you to get a job, stop being an alcoholic or druggie (neither of which I am, but people do make their assumptions, don't they). Try just once to go two weeks without having more food at one time then free candy from the dishes in front of doctors offices. See for yourself how fast you start thinking about hurting people or robbing people (again, something I never did, not because I didn't want to, but because living on the street means your stuff gets stolen from you pretty much daily).
I'm not saying that you should give all your money to people, I'm saying don't pass judgement on those you don't know.
How about the next time that someone asks you for change, you offer to give them a meal in exchange for them doing your dirty work. (gardening, trash, dishes) Don't assume that just because they're sitting there, fighting back tears, (as I am while I write this, thinking about everything I had to go through, and all the things people said to me) that they aren't willing to fix their situation.
Just a thought.
