I know I've been pretending myself for long enough along with him. . . It was different before. Now there will be someone else to think of, and why would I want to raise my child in a pretend happiness? For once I am not just thinking about myself, but he just see's it as me being selfish as always. I don't want my child to turn 18 and have his or her parents up and split up because we don't have to pretend to be happy for him or her anymore. Why in the hell would I want to fucking do that? I'm trying to grow up, and plan how I want to raise my child, and I don't want to raise it in a life of make believe.
