Teddy Grahams's blog: "Poetry and other self-expressions."

Once upon a Nightmare

Lost inside my nightmares,
slipping through the scenes.
I'm an actor in this play,
and there's nothing I care to say.

They're swallowing my sanity,
injecting these thoughts,
like drugging a lab rat,
to see how I react.

And I know,
you find joy in this experiment.
And I know,
you like to watch me break down.
And I know, 
you stand there with your clip board,
writing down everything that makes you laugh.

I walk around, slamming into glass walls,
I hit the ground, everything turns grey.
I hear the sound, of these walls collapsing,
shattering all that is this world.

Reflected in the shards are fragments of my memory.
I touch one, it crumbles, a spear thrust in my mind.
Every time I try to remember what it feels like to have solace,
I'm impaled by some wicked dream.

All that I know,
seems to be leaving me behind.
All that I care about,
seems like one complex illusion.
I need to open up my eyes
and truly see,
see what is becoming of this reality.

Cut!
What are you thinking about?
Hey can you hear me?
*snap snap* Welcome back my friend,
I'm glad you can finally hear me once again.
Now stand up and drink this potion,
it'll make you remember anything.

Welcome to the vicious circle that is my dream.

--------------------------

A poem of a dream I once had.

The Devil's Illusion

Distressed,
Confused,
Holding on to a broken past.
It haunts you,
It taunts you,
Beckoning your soul to hell.
Deteriorating,
Terrorizing,
This terrible lie has cast a spell over you.
Used,
Abused,
You're tearing yourself to pieces over this.
.. ..

It will never let go,
As long as you hold on,
As long as you desire.
It'll never let go,
As long as you hate,
As long as you love.
It'll never let go,
As long as you dwell on your shattered memories,
It'll never let go,
While you carry on with these distorted mentalities.
.. ..

It invades your dreams,
It tears at the seams,
It devours your heart and your mind.
This is the truth,
It is a part of you,
yet all you can see is behind.
.. ..

Nothing seems right,
Nothing seems fair,
Everything is lost or so it appears…
You can't go on,
It doesn't feel real,
In fact you can't feel fucking anything…
You're lost in time,
You think this a dream
When the dream is simply a vicious reality.
You must train yourself to see beyond,
This clever deception,
Or you will never...
Never see your infinity.
.. ..

It will never let go,
As long as you hold on,
As long as you desire.
It'll never let go,
As long as you fear,
As long as you're weak.
It'll never let go,
As long as you feel like you're the only one,
It'll never let go…
While you carry on in this tormented memory.
.. ..

And when you finally wake up you will see,
Everything your feeling is an in between.
A transitional phase
In which you will learn,
Happiness isn't some fuel to burn.
.. ..

Until you realize
This is self-inflicted pain,
You'll be screaming in circles in the acid rain.
And the time will come where
Everything is on fire,
you'll be wallowing in their ashes,
Hurting there all alone,
A bullet in your soul
With no one to save you but yourself…
.. ..

If I could heal you,
I could save you from this loneliness.
If I could take away these memories,
Take away this pain,
You'd be vulnerable to this illusion once again.
.. ..

The only way to release yourself from this devilish mirage is to
forgive and let go...

Forgive and let go...

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I wrote this years ago for a friend in suffering.

If this made you feel something or reflect on an event or period of your life please leave a comment.