SexiMomma's blog: "poems"

Reasons Why

Our love is the long lasting kind;
We’ve been together quite awhile.
I love you for so many things,
Your voice, your touch, your kiss, your smile.

You accept me as I am;
I can relax and just be me.
Even when my quirks come out,
You think they’re cute; you let me be.  

With you, there’s nothing to resist;
You’re irresistible to me.
I’m drawn to you in total trust;
I give myself to you willingly.

Your sweet devotion never fails;
You view me with a patient heart.
You love me, dear, no matter what.
You’ve been that way right from the start.

Those are just a few reasons why
I’ll always love you like I do.
We’ll have a lifetime full of love,
And it will happen because of you.

Donald Martin James James, Donald Martin 08-28-1960 - 01-09-2009 Loving husband, father figure, Pop Pop, brother, uncle and a very special friend. He was preceded in death by his mother and father Peggy Louise James, nee Godfrey and Richard Lee James Sr. and two brothers Robert Michael James and Jonathon Timothy James. Donnie was truly loved by all who knew him and will be dearly missed.Services: Service to be held 01-24-09 at 10:00 a.m.Our Lady of the Presentation, 8860 Tudor Ave., Saint Louis, MO 63114. ( Donnie was more than a friend, or father-like to me he was my dad ) When Tomorrow Starts Without Me When tomorrow starts without me, and I'm not there to see; If the sun should rise and find your eyes, all filled with tears for me; I wish so much you wouldn't cry, the way you did today, while thinking of the many things, we didn't get to say. I know how much you love me, as much as I love you, and each time that you think of me, I know you'll miss me too; But when tomorrow starts without me, please try to understand, that an angel came and called my name, and took me by the hand, and said my place was ready, in heaven far above, and that I'd have to leave behind, all those I dearly love. But as I turned to walk away, a tear fell from my eye, for all life, I'd always thought, I didn't want to die. I had so much to live for, so much yet to do, it seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you. I thought of all the yesterdays, the good ones and the bad, I thought of all the love we shared, and all the fun we had. If I could relive yesterday, just even for awhile, I'd say goodbye and kiss you and maybe see you smile. But then I fully realized, that this could never be, for emptiness and memories, would take the place of me. And when I thought of worldly things, I might miss come tomorrow, I thought of you, and when I did, my heart was filled with sorrow. But when I walked through heaven's gates, I felt so much at home. When God looked down and smiled at me, from His great golden throne, He said, "This is eternity, and all I've promised you". Today for life on earth is past, but here it starts anew. I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last, and since each day's the same day, there's no longing for the past. But you have been so faithful, so trusting and so true. Though there were times you did some things, you knew you shouldn't do. But you have been forgiven and now at last you're free. So won't you take my hand and share my life with me? So when tomorrow starts without me, don't think we're far apart, for every time you think of me, I'm right here, in your heart.

My Children are very smart, All of them have a great big heart. They all are growing up each and every day, In there own unique and specail way, All my children are filled with joy, I love them dearly my girls and boys. When I am sad and had a bad day, All my children know how to make the hurt go away I love my children more than words could ever say I am greatful they are alive each and every day. They mean more to me than anyone will ever know When they are not with me the hours go by slow, Everyday brings a brand new start, After all my children are my heart. I thank you, God, each and every day, That you sent me six beautiful angels my way. So with all that said, Dear Lord, look over them as they lay down thier heads, Keep them safe from harms way, Remember that I love them as I pray.

In December, snowflakes fall from the sky Those snowflakes as precious as your eyes Pure romance, our tender hearts will chase Cuddling up so ever warm by the fireplace. In beautiful spring, during April’s showers Before nature is blooming with sunflowers I will hold you close to kiss you in the rain It’s you my lover, that my heart has gained. It’s in the midst of summer, neath the stars You and I lay, til the moon comes our way The stars are aligned and the mood is right And your beauty, reflects in the moonlight. In the autumn, leaves falling from the trees Some are yellow, orange, brown and green I’ll follow my heart and follow my dreams It’s your love my darling that’s guiding me. I fell for you as the leaves do in November Love, is as beautiful as December’s winter It’s through these four seasons, of our love That my tender heart simply grown to love.

LISTENING TO HER WORDS I wish I would have listened To the words she use to say- Perhaps I'd feel more peaceful With the flowers that I now lay. So often she would tell me The day would soon be here- And times we shared together Would surely disappear. But I kept myself believing That life would be real long- There'd always be tomorrow I wish that I'd been wrong. I sure do miss her laughter I know now what she meant- Today will hold the memories Not only ones in which we'd spent. The feelings that I have inside I feel both day and night- And now I wish I'd was the chance To say I love you before your flight. If only I would have listened To the words you'd use to say- Perhaps I'd feel more peaceful With the flowers that I now lay.

Never Alone I feel you in the morning When at first I awake Your thought is with me With each decision I make You'd been around forever Since the first breath I took Now I have to go on alone But for love, I need not look Cause by what you bestowed In our short time together Will last in my heart Forever and ever Although you've left And now walk above I'm never alone I'm wrapped in your love Enjoy now your long waited reward Feel peace that your love continues on What was taught to me, will be taught to mine Cause you live on in me even after you've gone I love you Grandma, May you rest in peace August 7, 2008

Beneath the canopy of moon and stars Two tiny people sit, for now together. Love binds them, they would like to hope, forever; But there is much that such a union bars. Heaven is so vast; the Earth so small, Yet large enough to stretch a great love thin. For love to flourish, it must turn within: To the single soul that unifies us all. Within this soul the walls of fear dissolve: Distance, difference, history are no more. The holy silence stills the sounds of war. We love as round us miracles revolve. We know we cannot live within this shell Of heaven both above us and below. Day by every day the world we know Will guarantee we recognize it well. Yet there are truths far greater than the sun, Beyond the blanket blue of every day. In love's dark longings, we will find a way To make our human separateness one.

Dear God, Why do You torture me so? When will You ever let my hardships end? When will my endless suffering abate? Why am I so tortured? "But, my child, I have given you everything you want. Why are you tortured so?" Because, God... Oh wait, God, while you are here I want to thank you for my children. My children are such beautiful blessings. Thank you, God, for these wonderful gifts. Thank you for their wit and their charm. Thank you for their health. I will cherish them with every breath I take, and forever be grateful and indebted to You. "You are most welcome, my child. But, please tell me - why are you still tortured so?" Because, God... Oh, and God? I wanted to thank you, again! Thank you for the food on my table, and the roof over my head, and these many precious moments of my life. My life has never been better! "You are welcome, my child. But, please, please, tell me - why are you tortured so?" Because, God... My dear God? Are You still there? Good. I thought You might have left me. I want to thank You for this most latest blessing. This wonderful new man You have placed in my life. How did You know, God, that we would be so perfect for each other? How did you know that the time was finally perfect in both of our lives...that the time was right for us to be together? "I know everything, my child. And you are most welcome. Thank you for your patience. But, please, please, tell me why you are still tortured so." Because, God. I am tortured so because...because now that I have no worries, no griefs, no more battles to fight, and no more strife, I am tortured by the 'peace'. It is unnerving, baffling, and uncomfortable. Tell me God, how can I stop this endless torture and relax in my joy and the gifts You have bestowed upon me? Tell me, my dear God. When will my torture end? "My dear child, don't you know that I send you 'grief' as my biggest gift to you? So that you may have sight to appreciate my other gifts to you? So that you may rejoice in the glory and not be blinded to your blessings. So that you may feel these gifts that I give you?" Oh, thank You, God! I understand fully now! Of all my blessings, my grief was truly my biggest blessing from You, for without it I would not know of all my many other blessings! Thank You, God! Thank You for the gift of grief!

My Baby Boy and Me Its 3 am they're all asleep And no one's here to see As we rock slowly back and forth My Baby Boy and Me. His little head is feather light tucked up against my chin I hold his tiny hand in mine and stroke his baby skin. The house about us creaks and groans the clock hands creep around He snuggles closer to me still and makes his baby sounds. I love these quiet hours so much and cherish every one store memories up inside my heart for lonely nights to come. All too soon he'll be grown up his need for Mama gone but until then I still have time for kisses and for song. Time for quiet hours like this with him cuddled in my arms where I wish he'd always stay protected safe and warm. And yet I know the day will come when this tiny little hand will be much bigger than my own he'll grow to be a man. But until then he's mine to love with no one here to see as we rock slowly back and forth my baby boy and me.

Dear Mommy and Daddy, I come to you a small and immature being with my own style and personality. I am yours for only a short time; enjoy me. First, please take time to find out who I am, and how much I can bring to you. Second, please feed me when I'm hungry. I never knew what hunger meant in mom's uterus and clocks and time mean very little to me. Third, please hold, cuddle, kiss, touch, stroke and cling to me. I was always held closely in mom's uterus and was never alone before. Fourth, please don't be disappointed when I'm not the perfect baby you expected, not disappointed with yourselves that you're not the perfect parents. Fifth, please don't expect too much from me as your newborn baby or too much from yourselves as parents. Give us both six weeks as a birthday present. Six weeks for me to grow, develop, mature and become more stable and predictable and six weeks for you to rest, relax and allow your baby to get back to normal. Sixth, please forgive me if I cry a lot; bear with me and in short time as I mature I'll spend less and less time crying and more and more time socializing. Seventh, please watch me carefully and I can tell you those things which sooth, console and please me. I am not a tyrant who was sent to make your life miserable, but the only way I can tell you that I 'm not happy is my crying. Eighth, please remember I am resilient and can withstand many natural mistakes you make with me and as long as you make them with love you cannot ruin me. Ninth, please take care of yourselves, eat a balanced diet, rest and exercise so that when we are together you have the health and strength to take care of me. Tenth, please take care of your relationship with each other for what good is a family bonding if there is no family to bond to. Although I may have turned you lives upside down, please realize that things will be back to normal before long. Thank you, Your loving baby.