Tazy's blog: "POEMS"

this iz sumthin i wrote when i waz in my last "relationship".. dont get it twisted.. at 1st it waz great.. but once the true colorz came out..n yes we BOTH playd parts in it but..i did try to stand by him thru theze issuez..for 3 yrz.. even 2gthr behind our familyz backs..cuz THEY culd all see..but he made me realize..he jus wont change..no matter how hard i pray or how long i stayd The more I love, the less I feel. This pain I have is so very real. The more I try, the less gets done. The closer you get the more I run. The more I need the less you give. This is really no way to live. The more you lie the less I heal. Why can't you tell me how you really feel? The more I know the less I care. With you, my life goes nowhere. The more I want the less I get. The longer we are together the less we fit. The more I love the less I feel. This pain you have caused is all too real. ~Tazy~

I've been alone so very long... Always tried to stay strong. Never let anyone inside my heart.. Not letting the love inside of me part. Keeping the pain to myself. The tourture of my past that I have felt.. The emptyness in my soul of no one to care for. The came you and you gave so much more. More than I thought I'd ever know. It's a feeling I never want to let go. What I feel inside is all so very true... In other words... I love you. ~Tazy~

~For Jeff~ To see the love that lays deep within your eyes.. To hear your heart laugh and know exactly why.. To know that it's you that's there to get me by.. To ask for these things from you.. may seem unreal.. But these are the ways my heart feels. To smell your skin in the air at night.. To feel you press your tender lips to mine and hold me tight.. To know that if loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right. To ask for these things from you.. may seem unreal.. But these are the ways my heart feels. To have "not long enough" weekends to learn and explore eachother.. To long for what we have together and want no other.. To know how strong our love is for one another.. To ask for these things from you.. may seem unreal.. But these are the ways my heart feels. To wake up in your arms and feel your breath upon my skin.. To slowly make sweet love to eachother again and again.. To feel you fill me with your hot sweet passion that comes from within.. To ask for these things from you.. may seem unreal.. But these are the ways my heart feels. I love me sum *U* angel HFPD2U ~LilBrat~ ~Tazy~

She gets your attention with her smile. She pulls you closer with her eyes. She wraps you up and keeps you there, But her world is full of lies. She's such a pretty poison. She listens to all you have to say. Makes you feel right at home. She pulls the strings to your heart, All the while, leaving you alone. She teases you with her pretty poison. She can change your mind in the blink of an eye. She can change your entire world. She can make you have to be with her, You can't live without the girl. She feeds you her pretty ppoison. She makes you live... You feed off of her alone. She makes you feel so complete, As though, without her, you are so very alone. She has filled you with her pretty poison. She takes over your heart..your mind. She takes over your soul. She leaves you feeling scared and empty. She now has complete controle. She is now keeping her pretty poison. She knew she couldn't really give you her heart. All she has to give is lust. She knew from the begining... She couldn't give you her trust. She only gave you her pretty poison. She has ripped out your heart... Taken all of your love away. She is gone now... But her pretty poison will always stay. ~Tazy~

the person i wrote this for KNOWZ who they are... I knew you'd leave, as the others have before. You'd give up on me and love me no more. I knew the wait went on to long. So now I have delayed and you're long gone. I knew I'd cause you pain... not ever meaning to do so. I never meant to hurt you.. I never wanted you to go. I though I knew your love for me...now my heart has new scars. I'll remember your love that I lost every time I see the moon and stars. I knew I'd never love anyone enough to keep them with me. I still dream of your love...that's so hard to see. I knew you'd hate me..for that I don't blame you. I tried to show you my love... I really thought you knew. But even worse now... I guess I thought I knew you...

She sits and crys.. For no reason she knows. She can't keep track of emotions.. Wonders where her thoughts all go. Feeling confused and shatterd inside.. Not knowing what can be done... Wishing she could just hide.. Trying so hard not to run.. Knowing this is her normal.. This is what she does every day.. But how long can a person self destruct.. Before she burns away? How long can you burn.. Before the flames dies? How much can you fake being o.k. Before uncovering all that you hide? How long can you stay confused and live.. In a world that just can't understand? How long can you be so empty with so much to give.. But scared of what you will demand.. If you open up your heart.. You open up your soul.. You become vulnerable.. With no place to go.. Wishing that she was normal.. Like what others seem to be.. Knowing she would never make it in this world.. If she wasn't me. welcum to my world... Blessed Be ~Tazy~

~For Jeff~ Jumping to conclusions... Confused by my own illusions... Knowing that things will always end the same. I never give the few that care The ones that are still there A chance or two to be in the game. I tell them the rules of it all Knowing I will only fall If I trust them to go by the rules I have made. But you help me shine.. And hold my hand while I walk the line.. Whenever I fall to the shade. You never played by my rules You never saw me as a game. You knew me in ways I didn't You never made me feel my shame. I have cared about you In ways I still don't understand. But thanx, angel, For being there.. To always hold my hand.. I love you, my angel

Before you, my heart was cold. Before you, this world grew old. Before you, I felt so very alone. Before you, this love, I'd never knowen. After you, my heart felt pain.. Just to feel your touch again. After you, this world was bitter.. I was all alone, with no safe corner. After you, I knew I'd never love again.. Knowing the love you gave to me, I couldn't handle that kind of pain. After you, I was more alone than before.. I realized that I needed you more and more. Since you, my heart has been filled with desire.. Since you, I can set this world on fire... Since you, I remember I was never alone. Since you, I know this love has always growen. I love you my angel, more than you know.. Your voice, your eyes, your kiss, your touch.. And the beauty of this is, I know you love me just as much. This time, I don't plan on letting you go.. There will never be another That will ever love eachother so. I love you my angel..

"Together" You've made me remember the good times When I could only remember the bad You're promising me a return Of the peace I long ago had. You're not running the other way & leaving me alone When that's what I wrongly think I need. You never dwell on my faults Instead you point out where I succeed. You make me laugh When I really want to cry You make me feel alive... When I used to feel like I've died. You've reminded me of things, That I haven't  felt since a few years ago. I'm finding myself doing things.. Showing things that I don't normally show. There's a comfort with you And it feels so right.. so good.. You give me a feeling.. Of being understood. Though it's not been long now Since someone's guided us to each other.. I feel like it's been years That we've been with one another. You have taken away the emptiness That's haunted me for so long... Looking in your loving eyes, I feel I can't do wrong. So I thank you for breathing life Back into a soul I felt was long ago dead. I find myself looking forward To all WE have to share… In the life we have ahead.. Together. ~Tazy~

~To Jeff~ From inside a heart that was broken And in what was once a darkend soul... You have filled my life with joy & love You've made me complete; made my world whole. The love that we share... So pure, so true... My soulmate, partner, bestfriend is you. You are everything I've always needed. Even tho I never knew Everything I've always wanted in life, love & happiness I found by being with you. I love you ~Tazy~