EVIL THOMAS's blog: "page of rage"

First time I heard the news it seems to just confuse

Don’t know how I’d lose and I think God is there just to abuse

But as the anger subsides and reality bring forth tears in the eyes

It's just then that I realize life is finite and everyone dies

I will never hear “ I love you “ and ever believe it the same way again

Not like it was spoken from those lips, from someone who was beyond a friend

Never again will I hear that voice that always made me smile

It's not at all my choice, I never had control all the while

I know that God needs his angels but damn it I just need a friend on earth

To make me feel like all this pain of living will eventually find its worth

Instead of reassuring me to believe that there is no point to any of this

If I could close my eyes and just stop breathing it would be my only wish

Life isn't fair I hear so many times but damnit this is a heavenly crime

You sit on your throne in heaven and you see us every day

You knew how much we meant to each other, most times it's all we would say

How do I find a path to walk away from this forest of rage

You could cut down every tree for a million books and the answer will never find a page

The only way to keep from crying is to be filled up with rage

For you took the one person I actually had who would open the cage

I will never hear that laugh, never feel that joy, never feel it’s going to be ok again

There won't be someone there to talk me out of the end

To lift me up, God you know I am constantly down

And the only reason I felt I lived was to hear that sound

“You know what, I am so proud of you, I know you more than the others do

I been thru everything you have been thru, watch you go thru it and I am in complete awe of you.

Another person would not be as strong as you are, no other man has ever gone so far.

You make life better wherever you are and in this life of darkness you are my shining star.

I know you know I love you cause I tell you everyday,

just keep on being you and you’ll make it someday.

I don’t know how you do it but all I have say Is that I Love you and it will never go away.”

I will never hear “ I love you “ and ever believe it the same way again

Not like it was spoken from those lips, from someone who was beyond a friend

Never again will I hear that voice that always made me smile

It’s not by choice, I never had control all the while.

The page of rage

Thomas  David Bartel 11-25-2016