I'm so isolated. Stuck inside my mind, unable to talk about what I feel I need to. It's scary to know you could lose everything unless you keep your mouth shut.
Today's been a bad one. It's been like that a lot lately. I can feel the connection, I can hear her speak. I used to think she cared, but she doesn't care. I wish I could go my entire life without saying one word about what I see and hear and feel, I wish. I need to say something before it destroys me. Before she destroys me. Sometimes she sounds like me, sometimes she sounds like Curtis, she used the voice of my best friend to make me hate her. I think the voice that scares me most of all, is hers. I hate when my eyes see what no one else can. I thinking back to a time when I killed a spider with my hand, a spider that wasn't there. I freaked out my friend.. I've learned to ignore most of everything when it's happening, unfortunately that means I block out reality as well. I see things like messages, and Curtis flirting when he's not. I sometimes feel as though he's only taking me places so he can see other people and he would feel bad leaving me. I love how he still loves me.
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