I am starting this blog in lu of my mumm that I created for those of you that don't know my mother or my realtionship with her.. I am not trying to say I was the perfect kid cause none of us are! But I really can't afford therapy so this is the next best thing hehe... Well before I was even born my mother wanted to have an abortion an my grandfather told her no way in hell so thank god for that!! When I was 4 yrs old my mother took me to my grandfather an left me with the words " take her I don't want her she never shuts up!" ( great start right?) so my grandfather took me an basicly raised me till I was 4 yrs old,, he then got sent to prision ( i know not the perfect settin but hey it is all i had) mom had no other choice but to take me at that point.. i don't remeber alot from that point on utill i was like in 3rd grade.. i just remember being really afraid of my mother..i can remember havin the chit beat out of me at one point an being drug around the living room by the hair of my head for not folding the towels right!!.. i can remember her chokin the shit out of me for something i did don't remember what.. at the age of 12 i can remeber being locked out of the house in the winter with no coat or socks an shoes an told to leave.. I can recall several faces of the revolving door of men in an out of her life.. an the endless friends that came over an u alaways had to go out side to play cause they were " busy" this usually ment they were doing drugs.. moving 2 to 3 times a yr ... i added it up once from the time my sister an i were in first grade untill 6th grade we had been in an out of 14 diffrent schools.. finally in 7th grade we moved to Prague Oklahoma.. we lived there till we were in 9 th grade first place that really felt like home an them mom got a hair in her arse an decied to move to Talequea oklahoma an my sister an i rasied so much hell that she moved us back to prague ( this is the i was not so perfect part) i can remember a few happy times growin up ya know trips to the zoo.. an the times when mom was happy they weren't very often but they did happen.. then she fell into harder drugs an moved us to a house that didn't have eletric or running water.. we lived like that for 2 yrs... i worked at a woodlot same place as my mom after school for a while an mom would keep my money to spend on drugs or food if she thought about it.. then i met Sam an Mary they lived next door to us an had horses.. i bought my horse from them an kept them over there i started hanging around over there more an they became the family i never had ( this is for another chapter).. so anyways the summer i was 15.5 i was living with some friends.. fighting with my mother all the time for the way she was livin her life an screwing ours up my sister an her were smoking weed all the time together an it was hell.. so we got to fighting all the time an when i told her i would turn her into the cops for child neglect.. she called my grandfather an told him i was a horrible child that never listened that hung out an partied all the time an was a whore.. so he drove from WVa to OK to get me an take me back with him.. after living with him for a month he said that it was very clear my mother had lied in order to remove me from her life an so that she wouldn't get into trouble with the law.. i adjusted the best i could to live in wva it sucked total culture shock not to mention i had to leave everything an everyone i loved behind an the only home i had known.. the night of juinor prom she called an told me on the phone that i was whore an she had heard that i was preggers.. i bawled an my grandfather told her not to contact me anymore i didn't speak to my mother for almost 3 yrs.. then i got preggers in highschool an married ( wrong move but happens ) an i wanted to move back to oklahoma so she came to my wedding tryin to mend fences.. an i moved back to oklahoma after graduation.. we got along for a while an then my life went to hell i had my son.. my husband wouldn't work an wanted to fuck aroun so at the age of 18 i found myself divorced an a single mother.. i tried to move in with my mother but her craziness started again.. an i was working in another town an moved in with someone an took to drinking alot while she kept my son.. i was there very night to see my son.. (still not the point i wasn't a good mother at that time an i am willing to admit it an will spend the rest of my life tryin to make up for it) so after i got myself to gether my mother decided that moving back to wva was a good idea an that if i wanted to keep my son i had to move back so again i found myself stuck in wva.. i got sober an have stayed that way since.. i met a very nice man which is my husband now an found out i was preggers with another child... well about a month after my daughter was born my mother decided that she wanted custody of my son an not my daughter just my son because i had moved out... well she kept my son over night i thought all was well an when i went to pick him up she said he isn't here she had my sister take him some where an i wouldn't tell me where .. once i found him she threatend all sorts of things.. an threatened to kill my husband.. anyways i moved to north carolina... an we stayed there for a while.. an in the yrs that have gone by i have forgiven my mother for the things that she has done because for one in hatin her i hated myself for two i thought that she had changed.. in the yrs that have gone by i noticed that she hasn't changed she stirs more chit than an 3 ppl i know an drives me nuts.. so now u are kinda up to date
