camaroric's blog: "morals"

VASELINE

the other day was sitting in a chatroom,it was a small room and had more women then men...(gotta like them odds)(and me being shy.suipid stupid stupid...okay enough about me)....said my hellos, the ladies were basically the ones that were chatting with a few man words in between...well the subject bounced around liked an oblong superball...and me with the typing skills of ahhhh....hmmm cant say child,cause most probaly type better then me....shoot my computer guy is 11 years old....best thing my daughter every did.....just jokin now...but that tells you that i need a dummy book for the dummy book....thats bad huh? so....let me think, get back to you on that one,ok...cool? 

okay back to the room (sorry got that shiny object syndrome)...well it gave me a chance to fulfilled every mans dream,well most....being a fly on the wall in the ladies filled room....and there as some good convo going on,when yep... it didnt take long for the sex to come knocking at the door....gotta love the mind,such a fun playground,and of course the mild man bashing...so i got my paper and pencil ready.... i was ready to be schooled!!! i watched as the words flew by,taking notes and sitting at the edge of my seat...learned what to do and" hell no" you dont too. this went on for a few,will admit i had a few laughs,and many times wanted to jump in and say something....but nope,didnt feel that would be a smart move...(see i do think with the shoulder one too)some would say i was a wimp,wuss and sureother choice words...but me,i say my mama taught me right....and of course the one set of words,all us men love to hear...  size does matter!!  

but after it ended i was still in that daze,wondering away....so i need to ask this,and yes its about sex...if you can be satified by just a finger,a tongue,or even that buddy of yours name bob,you say you dont need men,which we all know is a lie hehehe and then it made me wonder  one thingso here goes...,and no not tryin to be a smartass  or nothing(already got that degree) but us enquiring minds want to know? 

why does size matter then?......oops sorry thinking outloud....my bad 

while sitting on a rock looking over the land in front of him, he lets out a sigh..."what is it Adam, why so bummed?" he hears from above...
"Well " he says "you gave me all this (pointing around)which I am grateful for, but I have no one to share it with...and I guess i'm lonely" there was a moment of silience,and then hears...."hmmmm Adam,I see your point there and do understand, so I came up with some ideas"
"I think I will create you a mate", the voice says... "to be beautiful, intelligent, gracious and loving"...Adam smiles... "Plus I think she will be great mother and a good cook" Adam smile widens..."She will keep the house spotless and make it into a home, and always be kind" And then the voice says"if we put our heads together we could come with some other options too" Adam is excited and jumping for joy, when he stops and ask...so whats this gotta cost me he asked the voice?....the voice answers back...not much,just an arm and a leg....Adam stands there with a puzzling look,scratches his head and he says...."hmmm Adam thinks, wow that does sound great!!!...but it does sounds a little steep?, Adam thinks some more and says... 

so....what can I get for a rib?....

I was in the store the other day chatting with a buddy, we were talking about cars, when his wife walked up, stood there, put her hands on her hips, and blurted out these words, oh come on ladies, you all got to admit being guilty of that, I can see those smiles!!!
she said in true style, “I just don’t understands what it is about, GUYS AND THEIR CARS” now remember that was my best bitchy voice… I tried…
So it got me to thinking…hmmm…
Well ladies, I might have an answer? as you know men are very simple type creatures, right? We don’t have many wants but we do have some needs, here’s a few, roof over our head, someone to bed, and damn it time to get fed! And we are notorious for turn anything into sex, Yep, I’m guilty of that! So remember that! See, pretty simple, huh?…
But guys and Cars, hmmm, there’s just that something about them, just listen to the words we use…
We can “bore ‘em“, we can “stroke ‘em“, we can “pump ‘em“, we can “inject em“, and let me check my breathe! Whoa ! You know where I’m going with this…and you don’t want to get me started on the “rear ends“…
So… yes I guess you could call it a love affair,but remember we that we do love beautiful things… like you ladies!!! But there is one difference between a BEAUTIFUL CAR and a VERY BEAUTIFUL LADY
CARS DON’T COMPLAIN!!!
Just a mans thoughts…bye now

and as a female friend wrote in my comments "CARS DRIVE-WOMEN RIDE....thanks malta,love it!!!...

You ever had one of those days, when sometime just tickles that funny bone so much you know that you got to share it…well lucky you, I just happen to have one of them and lucky you we have this thing called a blog…honestly now, who the hell names this stuff, come on! you couldn’t come up with something thing better there? I mean blog…this is what comes to mind right off when I think of “blog” be sitting at the house, when there’s a knock on your door, you open it and get this greeting” HI MY NAME IS BLOB AND THIS IS MY SON BLOG AND WE JUST MOVE IN…” you know “the blob”… the movie…hehe? Okay sorry…I know…but really it sounded funnier in my head, and yes it’s true, I am easily amused!!! Well welcome to world!!!

Okay drifting now…where was I?

Oh yeah, I remember….I was sitting at a buddies house one night, just kicking back in the den watching some sport on the boob tube( sorry just had to throw that word in… boob…hehe)and his wife and 14 yr old daughter was arguing big time in the kitchen…well like any 14 yr old you know they got to have an audience…so in the den it comes. voices yelling, insults flying, and well …you know the routine, been there, done that! Right? Well this goes on for a moment, when dad stands up and ask “what’s going on now? Mom turns and looks at dad, and says “I was on her face book, did you know that you’re daughter 9 never understood why when they are in trouble they are always “your…)“has pictures of herself in her bra and panties posted on her page, and I don’t feel that is right or moral” well he looks at his wife and says “times are different now honey, and what can a couple of picture hurt?” and of course the daughter screams out “ yeah mom times are different, you are so old fashion, this is a new world, and we still have morals” you know in that nice snotty voice we loved from our kids so much?…yeah that one!!! I looked at mom and she quickly popped out these words…wait this is great…she says “LET ME TELL YOU THIS,MISSY YES I UNDERSTAND THAT THIS A NEW WORLD, AND THAT TIMES ARE DIFFERENT,BUT YOU WANT TO GO AND THROW MORALS IN MY FACE” WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT MORALS,GIRLS OF YESTERDAY PROTECTED THEIR MORALS,WHERE GIRLS YOUR AGE ,THEY ARE LIKE PAPERBOYS, AND MORALS ARE LIKE FREE NEWSPAPERS,AND YOU JUST THROW IT ALL OVER TOWN,NOT CARING WHERE IT LANDS OR WITH WHOM…SO PULL UP YOUR PANTS, GET AJOB AND WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE GROWN UP…THINK SOME MORE!!! And then the good rule… MY HOUSE , MY RULES!!! The daughters jaw dropped it was priceless, so I do what I thought was right…

And stupid me… I jumped up ,start clapping, cheering, and then raised the “RIGHT ON SISTER” salute…well word to the wise, honestly not a good idea, the look, oh shit, yes the look she give me…wow… it knocked me back a few steps and it hurt too!!! But what can I say, been told many times that I’m a ,,,hmmm how do I put this gently, well lets just say my name is ric so I can be a “RICKHEAD” and leave it at that…hehe

Well that’s my story oh wait excuse me “MY BLOG” gotta keep up with them times…hey I thought it was funny!!! Geeeeez

But the way I see it mom +1 daughter-0 hehe love it!!!

Was sitting around on Sunday morning drinking hot tea( they say its better for you then coffee, yeah ok give it some taste then!) and watching 3 stooges on TV and yes I did say the 3 stooges!
when I noticed that women from that era wore padded bras… oh! Wait, here let me introduce myself “ my name is RIC” and “I DO LOOK” bowing my head in shame…when no lie, the next commercial, that came on was a Playtex bra, that just topped the cake, and sent me thinking about the name “ Wonder Bra” hmmm, I know typical man here!
Well I think I know why they called it the wonder bra, yep it’s when you take it off in front of us… its leaves us standing there wondering? “where the hell did they go” “I know they were there a minute ago” “call 911“, we got a theft to report !!!”( now that was suppose to be in my best “duh” voice, ok)
See ladies you think it’s a treasure that helps you on your quest down the path of beauty… Oh and it does, we do notices… ( again bowing head) but let me just say this first to say you ladies are “ALWAYS VERY BEAUTIFUL TO US, NO MATTER WHAT” (pssst, guys, do you think they bought it?)
See us guys do know it’s part of that guessing game you like to keep us, and we do understand cause us men do like pretty things(cars, toys, etc), that’s for sure! We do they are great,(come on guys, stand up and applaude ! Clapping thank you thank you thank you clapping)
To us it’s like that present you get from that mystery person… hmmm… come on ladies, you do know what I’m talking about. when you open that package and you look and its just not what you expected?
But You Keep On Smiling….
This is just a man’s thought, what can I say?