read my profile before adding's blog: "Meg"

Alan Jackson Like Red On A Rose

it's so stupid it's funny!!!

well it freakin started again. i'm sure i've said something to the fact that i have chronic pelvic pain in other blogs. for the record i'm not writing this so everyone in the world can see my problems, it's kind of my diary. anyways my pain started yesterday and it sucks! it's a good think i don't have to work till monday lol. I hope i can get into the doctor soon! i'm gonna need some kind of pain meds if i'm gonna be able to work. seems to always help if i can have some sort of pain pill. i was scared when they put me on vicadin and then they put me on loratab's. i'm scared that i could get addicted to them so who knows guess we'll see huh?

who the hell invented waitressing anyways? it's a crock. like today and several other days, i bust my ass make sure their meals are okay give them something free then the person stiffs you by either not leaving a tip or this lady today leaves me 85 cents. what the hell am i going to buy with that? do people not realize that down here at leaste don't know about other states but i get paid 2.75 an hr plus tips which doesn't get me anywhere! shit i came here to kansas not by choice i was homeless and only one person in my life would help me. my fam doesn't give a shit about me since my mom died. not even my dad. hell i called him and told me he didn't have room for me. i was like not even on the couch, now here's the situtaion on that. My dad married my step mom one year, 3 months and 28 days after my mom died. in fact got married on my mom's birthday! well his step son can live there but i cant? do you know how crappy that makes me feel? he's trying to get me to leave his life completly, i could be then i'd have no one and might as well not! oh well all i know is that it's made me a VERY strong person and i'm very independant person! i dont need anyone to take care of me i can take care of myself and have done so for the past 3 years. anyways there's some more about lil ol me!

hey if anyone reads this i have new photos deleted the last one so check it out!

I CARRY YOUR HEART WITH ME ( I CARRY IT IN MY HEART) i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) E.E Cummings This is the most beatiful poem i've ever read and i and dedicating it to my mom. Vicki S. Bohling 03-29-57 12-01-03 R.I.P p.s. as y9u can tell my mom passed away 3 yrs ago on Dec 1st. I don't have the heart to write her a poem myself and don't get me wrong i can write but i don't feel i can write her a poem that would be good enough. She wasn't a saint or anything, nobody is but i don't feel it will do her justice anyways figured i might share this poem with you and let you in on a little something about me.