Love… love …somehow that subject seems to pop up a lot these past few days. It is the singular force that's supposed to bind people together. Its power ripples throughout our culture and society like the shockwaves of a thermonuclear explosion... It is the object of devotion and scorn for many people alike depending on the sides they lived through. But the thing is… who the hell knows what love is about? Because I sure as hell don't know why that four letter word hurts and heals at times...
We fall in love all the time; it's kinda sickening how many people "fall in love" …how many of us actually understand what that means? Is it a feeling of extreme like towards another? Is it a feeling of devotion and willingness to sacrifice for the subject of love? Is it a chemical reaction in our body driven by primal forces to mate and produce offspring? Thing is… I think its all of that… and a whole lot more that we don't quite understand.
Love alone, in the end, is every human emotion combined, refined and amplified to an infinite fold. This is probably the reason why most people can't define the feeling of love in the first place. It's beyond words…either that or some of us need to read a little bit more. Nevertheless, think about it… aside from all the glorious things you feel when it comes to love, no greater hate, misery, suffering and torment can come from who or what you loved the most. People ask how is it possible to feel happy and sad at the same time. The answer to that is … fall in love.
Maybe that's why I have no faith in love itself. I used to have faith ... and don't get me wrong: a part of me still believes in love. But, I have my own faith in it. And I honestly don't believe that love is enough between two people. I never do. So, what if it's every single human emotion... "Wow…I feel pain… but I'm happy as well. I'm confused" Nope… I certainly don't want that reaction again. But, it's inevitable.
I don't know… perhaps being more practical when it comes to relationships isn't healthy. But… seeing that there has to be something you want from your partner, something that explains the reason for your attraction. I mean…love dies. That's the honest truth… love can die. But as human beings, there has got to be a fuel for it. The ultimate reason… this desiring something we can never have. Living the rest of your life… always out of reach of something only your significant other can give you.
It doesn't have to be physical. I'm all for mind, heart and soul. But, it's something I don't have. Maybe for me… it's a heart, a soul and a future feared. Ok, maybe it's not as easy as that… but that's the best I can sum it up. At least, I know even in the absence of love…that alone warrants my devotion and willingness to sacrifice something. If that isn't love…well…it's so close no one can tell the difference.
So much for love. Romantics may say love needs no reason nor words, but I say that's cause they're not looking far enough into the future. I've learnt my lesson. I may not have lost faith, but I've expanded it a little bit more than just devotion, trust and sacrifice. It's simple if not cold. Hehe…cold love…who'd have thought about it?
Yeah…love…sometimes it can be the most wonderful thing in the world. Other times…well…it's just another way to bleed…
