I Play WOW's blog: "Look Into Me"

There he sat, the most exquisite specimen of man I had seen in a long time. There was just something about his look that gave me a tingle in between my legs. He was slowly sipping his coffee and reading the sports section of the USA Today. As I sat there drinking my orange juice and nibbling on my muffin, I wondered if such a man would have any interest in me at all. I didn't think I could possibly be his type. He must have felt me staring, and looked my direction. He caught my gaze, and our eyes met. Something came over me, and I felt incredibly brazen just then. I flashed him my most dazzling smile, and to my delight, he smiled back. He went back to reading, and I went back to my muffin for a minute. Something about him made me want to look again. So there I was staring once more. He again caught me, and this time, we lingered a bit longer. "Stop it," I told myself, "You are probably creeping him out, rather than turning him on." So, I went back to my muffin, and tried to concentrate on the magazine laid out on my table. The next thing I knew, there was this beautiful man, standing before me. "Hello," he said. God his voice was as sexy as the rest of him. That alone made me quiver more. I returned his hello with one of my own, and asked him to sit down, with another flash of my pearly whites. He obliged me and took the chair across from me. Still not knowing where all the confidence was coming from, I told him I thought he was damned sexy. He smiled and said that he noticed me the minute I walked in the front door. "Is he serious?" I thought to myself, all the while, the excitement growing inside me. "Would you have dinner with me?" he asked. I thought for a minute, and I decided that I didn't want to wait that long to have a piece of him. I definitely knew that is what I wanted from him. "Could we skip dinner and go straight for desert?" I asked with a devilish look in my eyes. He raised his eyebrows slightly and replied, "I don't think I have ever had a more perfect offer." We arranged to meet each other at the hotel near my office at about 5:30. I insisted on taking care of the room since it was my suggestion, besides, I had a connection there, and the manager owed me a favor, so I was sure that I could get a freebie. I didn't tell him that, however. I didn't want to look completely cheap. Especially since he said he would bring the wine. I arrived a little early and got checked in and settled. We had exchanged cell phone numbers, so I called him to give him the room number, so he wouldn't have to inquire at the front desk. He knocked on the door at precisely 5:30. Damn, hot as hell and prompt? I was so turned on, I doubted I would need any wine. I was right about not needing wine. As soon as he entered and the door closed, I knew I had to devour him. I grabbed the wine in his hand and set it on the table beside the door. Then I looked deep into his eyes with all the lust I had building in me. He took my cue and placed his mouth hard on mine. I opened my mouth a little and let his tongue slip inside. His hand reached up and lightly brushed my left breast. He must have been testing the waters, and when I moaned in approval, he placed his hand fully on my breast. Continuing our embrace, he rubbed my breasts through my thin shirt and bra. I wanted him to touch my bare skin, so I stepped back from the kiss and ripped off my shirt and bra. There I stood in front of him naked from the waste up. He smiled in approval, and once again moved toward me. Placing both hands on my tits, he gave each one a little squeeze. Then he took each nipple between his fingers and twisted ever so slightly. I cried out then as he seemed to know just what to do to make me completely crazy for him. He gave me his tongue again, and this time, I sucked on it just a little at first, and when I felt his excitement grow with my touch, I sucked a little harder. He pulled away for a breath and said, "Damn, you have found the thing I love the most." I replied, "So have you. I am so fucking wet right now." "I want to feel," he said. Then he reached for the button on my pants, and before I knew it, they were around my ankles along with my panties. I felt his big fingers graze my pussy lips. "Mmmmmm," was all I could muster as a response. I took my pants and underwear the rest of the way off, and tossed them aside. Then he knelt before me and looked intently at my pussy. His fingers were there again, and he found my clit and began to rub it gently. Then he found my slippery hole and inserted his thick finger inside. "God, I want your mouth on me, " I told him. He moved me to the bed so that my legs wouldn't buckle underneath of me as he began to pleasure my clit with his tongue. Wow, did he ever know what he was doing. The only other times that I am generally this happy with oral sex is when I am with a woman. Someone has obviously been a great teacher to him at some point in his life. I may have to find out who and send her a thank you note. Flicking his tongue over my clit and in and out of my pussy was sending me to new heights. I moaned and writhed my body beneath his face. He used just the right amount of pressure as he gently sucked on my clit. Again, he stuck a thick finger in my pussy. "More," I told him, "give me 2 fingers." He did so, and they filled my tight wet pussy just right. "I don't want you to cum this way," he told me. "Then you had better stop now," was my reply, "besides, I do believe it is your turn." Slipping off his pants, he then stood before me so that I could admire God's handiwork. My Lord, he is exquisite. His erection stood before me, 10 inches of mocha chocolate glory. I had never seen girth as wide as his, and the thought of all that manhood inside of me made my pussy tingle again, and spew a little more sweet juice. I slid forward and took the tip of his cock in my mouth. He moaned in approval as I sucked just the tip first. Then I took my mouth off him and played up and down the massive shaft of him with my tongue. Since I wasn't holding on to him, his cock bounced up and down with each lick that I delivered. I was surprised at how hard he already was, but also excited that he must have felt the same attraction to me, as I did to him. I took his cock in my mouth again, and this time grabbed the base with my hand. I slowly worked the tip a bit at first, and then gradually began to take more of him in my mouth. Eventually, I had swallowed him. "Ooooohhhhh," he cried, "God, you are amazing." I moved my head back and slowly removed his cock from my mouth. Then I repeated the process over again, this time, letting him hold me there for a good minute. When he let me go, I quickly took my mouth off, and caught a welcome breath. I could tell he loved to hear me choking just a bit. Taking him in my mouth again, I moved his cock in and out of it. I heard his moans get stronger and stronger and I continued to ravish his member. "Do you want me to fuck you now?"he asked. "Yes," I answered weakly. He pushed me back on the bed and parted my legs wide. He let me have the tip of his cock in my pussy, and I cried out with pleasure. "Slow," he said, "I am going to go so slow, you will be begging for all of me." "What if I already am?" I asked him. He smiled his only response to my question and just continued his torture. Penetrating me just about and inch at a time made my pussy clench tighter around his cock. It was the most glorious thing to feel those 10 inches sliding their way into my hole "Are you going to beg for me to fuck you?" he asked. I looked longingly and feverishly into his eyes, and that was all he needed. He pounded the rest of his throbbing hot cock in my pussy and found a rhythm that I quickly matched. We rocked and gyrated and he shoved his dick in me harder and harder. An animal-like cry escaped my lips. "Fuck my tight pussy," I growled. "You want my dick?" he asked. "I want it all," was the reply. I reached my hand down to my clit and rubbed it for added ecstacy. He lifted my legs onto his shoulders and my hips rose to meet his again. His balls made slapping noises against my ass, as he drove himself deeper and deeper in my hole. He was by far the most incredible fuck I have ever had in my life. He knew just how to move his hips to give me the right amount of pressure on my g-spot. I could feel a mind-blowing orgasm building up inside of me. "I want you to come for me," he told me. "I want to feel that hot pussy squeezing my dick." This sent me closer to the edge. I was almost there, but I wanted him to come with me. "Are you almost there, I am just about to come all over your big dick!" I said. He told me not to worry about him, he told me when he felt me coming, he would be there with me. He told me, "Just let it go." I closed my eyes then, and suddenly, it exploded in me. I looked back into his eyes as I yelled, "I'm coming!" My hips bucked and writhed as I experienced the most intense orgasm I had ever felt. I could feel my cum spewing all over his cock, and then I heard him growl. He came for me then, pounding his cock in and out of my pussy and filling me full of his cream. He fell on top of me, and we lay there sweaty and spent for a moment, before he rolled over onto the other side of the bed. We both breathed heavily as we lay there on our backs. "That was incredible," I managed to squeak out. He agreed with a simple "Yeah." "How is your recovery time?" I asked him. He looked into my eyes and smiled devilishly. I knew it must not be long, and I checked the time on the room clock. That turned into the most amazing night of my life, and I never saw him again. Somehow, I don't even care. Fantasies are and incredible thing, and I have so many more that I am ready to act out!

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.) If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!) The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (O.M.G.!) A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes. (In my next life, I want to be a pig.) A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.) ( I'm still not over the pig.) Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Do not try this at home...... maybe at work.) The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off ! ("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!") The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes... lucky pig... can you imagine??) The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?) Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity) Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know) The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm.......) Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people. (If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?) Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (OK, so that would be a good thing....) A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder who was paid to figure that out?) An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.) Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that too.) Polar bears are left-handed. (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.) Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig??)

Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some construction workers that makes you believe that we CAN make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time... A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant lot. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot. The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers. Eventually the construction crew, all of them gems-in-the-rough, more or less adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of the first week they even presented her with a pay envelope containing a couple of dollars. The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate words of admiration and suggested that they take the two dollar "pay" she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account. When they got to the bank the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, "I worked last week with the crew Building the house next door to us." "My goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on this house again this week, too?" The little girl replied, "I will if those assholes at Home Depot ever deliver the fu***** sheet rock..." It just brings a tear to the eye.

This is not for sensitive male readers... 1. Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground? A. Shoot him again. 2. Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung? A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck & the noose. 3. Q. Why do little boys whine? A. Because they're practicing to be men. 4.How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. One - he just holds it up there & waits for the world to revolve around him. OR. Three - one to screw in the bulb, two to listen to him brag about the screwing part. 5. Q. What do you call a handcuffed man? A. Trustworthy. 6. Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath & calling your name? A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough. 7. Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg? A. Because not one will stop and ask directions. 8. Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating? A. To stop the snoring before it starts 9. Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. 10. Q: What is the difference between men and women... A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need. 11. Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. 12. Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses! 5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new. 8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer? 9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

You may not know this, but many non-living things have a gender. 1) Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. 2) Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed. 3) A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and 's often over-inflated. 4) A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part. 5) Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water. 6) A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on. 7) A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up. 8) An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom. 9) A Hammer is Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around. 10) A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male, didn't you? But consider this - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

I love the tone, Of your sexual moan. The fire in your eyes, When I am between your thighs. I love to make you sweat, I love the look of you wet. The way I make your body quiver, With each lick that I deliver. I love that when our bodies mingle, The tips of all my regions tingle. The way you look when you feel pleasure, Makes me feel like your only treasure. I love that when you reach your high, It is MY name that your lips cry. By Crystal VanSickle January 3, 2006

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement. >> Noticing this, a policeman stops her...."Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag..." >> "Damn!" says the little old lady....."I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!" >> "Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money?" " Did you steal it?" >> "Oh, no", says the little old lady. "You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds!" "So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!" >> "Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?" >> "Well", says the little old lady, "not all of them pay up"...

IDIOTS AMONG US: I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "too many deer were being hit by cars" and he didn't want them to cross there anymore. This one was from Kingman, KS. ______________________________________ IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. And he was a Kansas City chef! _____________________________________ IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know? He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask." Happened in Birmingham, Ala. _____________________________________ IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS _____________________________________ IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments. _____________________________________ IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office no less. _____________________________________ IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi! _____________________________________ *they walk among us .. AND REPRODUCE!!!

10... Does this come in children's sizes? 9...No thanks, just sniffing. 8...I'll be in the dressing room going blind. 7...Mom will love this. 6...Oh, the size won't matter. She's inflatable. 5...No need to wrap it up. I'll eat it here. 4...Will you model this for me??? 3...The Miracle What??? This is better than world peace!! 2...45 bucks?? You're just gonna end up NAKED anyway!! 1... Oh, honey, you'll never squeeze your fat ass into that.