PJ's blog: "Life"

I'm done, I've had enough; love is an sick and elusive figment of the imagination that I will never find and nor will it ever find me. Quite frankly, I think that I'm probably better off alone; because it seems that whenever I get set in a "relationship" I always leave a path of destruction behind me. It is getting to the point where I can no longer repair the emotional pain or damage that I have set upon myself. I am just gonna let life go on without me trying to find a significant other, because they tend to waste my physical and mental time.

My ex fu wife/r/l/g/f is now my ex everything because she didn't have the self restraint or patience to wait long enough until we could be together in real life. She needs someone to hold and cuddle and etc... I was asked for a 2nd chance and like a fool I allowed it. Time passed and my suspicions and paranoia were starting to come to a head and the question that ended it all was asked. I am not even going to attempt it anymore. I don't need to waste my time with such trivial things like this, if I'm 40 by the time I even get a girlfriend or wife, I guess that is just how it is going to have to be.

Never in my life would have I imagined that because I gave out my messenger name and phone number, that just texting, and talking to someone, would lead to love, a fu-wedding and a relationship. On a text she told me she loved me and I had to pick my jaw up off of the floor of the car. I was in a parking lot waiting for someone to come back. I asked her if it was just a friendship love, or if it was a marry me type of love. The answer I got floored me as well, I never guessed that we would start to love each other right then, get fu-married the same day, and start a relationship a day later. I know it was done kinda backwards, get "married" then start a relationship in real life. I guess weirder things have happened, but never like this to me.