luvbytes's blog: "life..."

I carry the memory of you very close to my heart...your beautiful smile and the way you decided to part. I'll always remember the way you made my heart sputter and flip... and I'll always remember you hanging with drool from your lip. I'll always remember the day you asked me to become your wife... but how can I forget the day you decided to end your life? There are so many memories of us, we were quite a pair... the memory that sticks in my mind though, is you dead with your blank stare. I carry many memories of you and these I'll mostly cherish... the memory that breaks my heart, is that you decided to perish. I'll keep all the memories, the good ones without a doubt... there's many memories though, I know I could do without.

Dead With Your Fucking Frown.. Why do you look so odd? Why do your eyes look so blank? Wake up now, tired of this childish prank. Your lips are at an odd angle, there's drool hanging from them too...Your skin is so ashen, with a subtle hint of blue. I am not understanding yet, what you went and done...you are my fiance and your mom and dad's son. The horror I am witness to, you dealt a final blow, as understanding seeps into me, my movements are not slow. There's little time to save you, I must cut you down...Forever in my mind, you dead with your fucking frown.

Suicide hurts everyone... the pain and torment that you are trying to escape, well you heap it on those that love you. While you are dead forever, your friends and family are left in your nightmarish aftermath, feeling immense guilt "for not seeing the signs" and wondering how death could ever seem more appealing to you than living life with them. You will take away their hopes and dreams, self-esteem, and ideals. You will rob them of loving you one more day. Not only will you leave behind your depression to manifest in them, you will leave this world a darker and colder place for them. My name is Kellie, last year on June 4, 2005, I was forced into the biggest trial of my life. My outlook on life and my sanity came crashing down around me when I discovered my fiance had hung himself in our bathroom. As I cut through his noose, and lowered his body to the ground, I realized the screaming was coming from me. My life hasn't been the same since. Don't do this to your loved ones, theres hope for your future, and theirs. Rest now and be free Michael, til we meet again..... Kellie