eve's blog: "Just some stuff I love!"

The following is allegedly an actual question given in a University of Washington chemistry mid-term exam. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their faith, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can reliably project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my freshman year that, "it will be a cold night in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls,leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being, which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God!" (Allegedly this student received the only A.)

Beth and her friends are out clubbing one Friday night when she meets a handsome guy by the bar. They talk, connect, and end up leaving together. When they get back to his place, he shows her around his apartment. One odd thing she notices is that an entire wall of his bedroom is devoted to a collection of stuffed toys arranged on shelves. The bottom shelf contains lots of small stuffed animals. The next shelf up contains slightly larger ones, and so on, all the way up to the top shelf, which contains gigantic teddy bears. Beth is a little surprised that a man would have such a sizable collection of stuffed animals but she decides not to be judgemental. In reality, she is actually impressed that he is willing to show his sensitive side to someone he just met. One thing leads to another and before long they are making love. The next morning, after a night of intense passion, she wakes up next to him. As she notices him waking up also, she rolls over and asks, smiling, "was it good for you, too?" The man shrugs and tells her she can have any prize she likes from the bottom shelf.

An overweight guy was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds. Next thing he sees is an advertisement for a "guaranteed" weight loss program. "yeah right", he thinks to himself. "But let's see what they can do." He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3-day, 10 lbs. weight loss program. The next day there comes a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike's and a sign hanging around her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me." Well, without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. After they are through he kisses the girl one last time and thinks to himself with a nod, "I like the way this company does business." For the next two days, the same girl shows up and the same thing happens each time. On the fourth day, he weighs himself and, sure enough, he has lost 10 pounds. Deciding that he likes his somewhat more slender physique, not to mention the method of "treatment", he calls the company back and subscribes to their 5-day, 20 lbs. weight loss program. He thinks that losing 20 pounds in only 5 days seems like a lot, but he is intrigued by what their "workout" schedule might be like this time. As expected, the next day there comes a knock at his door. When he answers it there stands a 22 year old knockout dressed in nothing but a pair of Reebok's and a sign hanging around her neck. She is simply stunning, the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me." He's out the door like a shot! This gal is in excellent shape and it takes a while to catch her. But when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. She is wonderful, the best he has ever had. He is really looking forward to the next four days. For the next four days, the same girl shows up and the same thing happens each time, much to his delight. On the sixth day, he weighs himself and, unbelievably, he has lost another 20 pounds. "I love this company," he thinks to himself, "I never knew losing weight could be so easy and so much fun." Feeling much better about himself, he decides to go for broke and subscribe to the company's 7-day, 50 pound weight loss program. "Are you sure, sir?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," says he, "I love your program. Haven't felt this good in years!" The next day there comes a knock at his door and he enthusiastically answers it. There stands before him a 200 pound perfect specimen of a man dressed in nothing but racing spikes and a sign around his neck. He introduces himself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If I can catch you, I can have you."

I've never been closer, I've tried to understand, That certain feeling, Carved by anothers hand, But it's too late to hesitate, We can't keep on living like this. Leave no track, Don't look back. All I desire (temptation) Keep climbing higher and higher (temptation) Adorable creatures (temptation) With unacceptable features (temptation) And trouble is coming (temptation) Its just the high cost of loving (temptation) And you can take it or leave it (temptation) But you'd better believe it. You've got to make me an offer, That cannot be ignored, So lets head for home now, Everything I have is yours, Step by step and day by day, Every second counts I can't break away. Leave no trace, Hide your face. Full Of desire (temptation) Keep climbing higher and higher (temptation) And you can take it or leave it (temptation) But you'd better believe it (yeah) Step by step and day by day, Every second counts I can't break away. Keep us from temptation, keep us from temptation, keep us from temptation, lead us not into temptation Trying to find it (temptation) You've got to get up behind it (temptation) Put your dime in the hot slot (temptation) But it's a million to one shot (temptation) You think you're right now (temptation) You've got to fake it tonight now (temptation) And now you give me a breakdown (temptation) Because it's time for a shakedown (temptation) Temptation (x16)

Evanescent like the scent of decay I was fading from the race When in despair, my darkest days Ran amok and forged her face From the fairest of handmaidens to A slick perverted wraith Nymphetamine Heaving midst narcissus On a maledict blanket of stars She was all three wishes Sex, sex, sex A lover hung on her death row I was hooked on her disease Highly strung like Cupid’s bow Whose arrows hungered meat And the blinding flare of passion In the shade of narrow streets Where their poison never rationed All the tips they left in me Two tracks Bric-a-brac Something passed between us Like a bad crack Upward-lit I’d met another kind Of rat In fact With every Rome inside me Licked and ransacked She haunted at the corners of my mind In black Cataracts Wouldn’t whitewash away Her filthy smoke stack She burnt me like a furnace For my future suicide LEAD to the river Midsummer, I waved A ‘V’’ of black swans On with hope to the grave And through Red September The skies fire-paved I begged you appear Like a thorn for the holy ones Cold was my soul Untold was the pain I faced when you left me A rose in the rain... So I swore to the razor That never, enchained Would your dark nails of faith Be pushed through my veins again Bared on your tomb I am a prayer for your loneliness And would you ever soon Come above unto me? For once upon a time From the binds of your lowliness I could always find The right slot for your sacred key Six feet deep is the incision In my heart, that barless prison Discolours all with tunnel vision Sunsetter Nymphetamine Sick and weak from my condition This lust, this vampyric addiction To her alone in full submission None better Nymphetamine Nymphetamine, nymphetamine Nymphetamine girl Nymphetamine, nymphetamine My nymphetamine girl Wracked with your charm I am circled like prey Back in the forest Where whispers persuade More sugar trails More white lady laid Than pillars of salt... (keeping Sodom at night at bay) fold to my arms Hold their mesmeric sway And dance out to the moon As we did in those golden days Christening stars I remember the way We were needle and spoon Mislaid in the burning hay Bared on your tomb I’m a prayer for your loneliness And would you ever soon Come above unto me? For once upon a time From the binds of your holiness I could always find The right slot for your sacred key Six feet deep is the incision In my heart, that barless prison Discolours all with tunnel vision Sunsetter Nymphetamine Sick and weak from my condition This lust, this vampyric addiction To her alone in full submission None better Nymphetamine Sunsetter Nymphetamine (Nymphetamine) None better Nymphetamine Two tracks Bric-a-brac Something passed between us Like a bad crack Upward-lit I’d met another kind Of rat In fact With every Rome inside me Licked and ransacked She haunted at the corners of my mind In black Cataracts Wouldn’t whitewash away Her filthy smoke stack She burnt me like a furnace For my future suicide

6am Christmas morning No shadows No reflections here Lying cheek to cheek In your cold embrace So soft and so tragic As a slaughterhouse You press the knife against your heart And say that ‘I love you so much you must kill me now’ If I was your vampire Certain as the moon Instead of killing time We’ll have each other Until the sun If I was your vampire Death waits for no one Hold my hands across your face Because I think Our time has come Digging your smile apart With my spade-tongue The hole is where the heart is We built this tomb together And I won’t fill it alone Beyond the pale Everything is black No turning back If I was your vampire Certain as the moon Instead of killing time We’ll have each other Until the sun If I was your vampire Death waits for no one Hold my hands across your face Because I think Our time has come Blood-stained sheets In the shape of your heart This is where it starts This is where it will end Here comes the Moon again 6:19 and I know I'm ready Drive me off the mountain You’ll burn I’ll eat your ashes The impossible wheels seducing Our corpse If I was your vampire Certain as the moon Instead of killing time We’ll have each other Until the sun If I was your vampire Death waits for no one Hold my hands across your face Because I think Our time has come Beyond the pale Everything's black No turning back This is where it starts This is where it will end Here comes the Moon again

Your misery is worn as a veil To hide bewitchment of the ugliest kind In place of Eve a bitter parody hails Daggers from the swagger Of a sodomite's concubine Gilded cunt You gilded cunt Your thin pretence overstretched and sickly Feigns love and light a long time laid in the grave My preference leans to killing you quickly Scissored in the gizzard That a heart no more maintains But i am tied To the labyrinth and the beast The one way track of eyes Black and grey like panzers Loose your shell Shoot the mouth The gates of hell Have often dropped their jaws about Satan's agents are perversions to bear Side to side with the diversions You use to guide my fingers there Dirty little gold digger Gilded cunt You gilded cunt Nothing is above you save a boreal light That halo paid for by a consummated ring of ice And below you, will i see you tonight Glower from your tower Built of ivory and spite? For i am torn Between the sheets that keep me borne And the teeth of a storm That reap then rend my stanzas Click your heels Three times six The stars are fixed May i climb and get you one? The palace at Versailles never held your tongue Nor did heaven ever weather The crosses that you came upon Dirty little soul frigger Gilded cunt You gilded cunt Leave your fears or show me Show me show me it off

This is me forever One of the lost ones The one withoug a name Without an honest heart as compass This is me for forever One without a name These lines the last endeavor To find the missing lifeline Oh how i wish For soothing rain All I wish is to dream again My loveing heart Lost in the dark For hope I`d give my everything My flower, withered between The pages 2 and 3 The once and forever bloom gone with my sins Walk the dark path Sleep with angels Call the past for help Touch me with your love And reveal to me my true name Oh how i wish For soothing rain All I wish is to dream again My loveing heart Lost in the dark For hope I`d give my everything Oh how I wish For soothing rain Oh how I wish to dream agian Once and for all And all for once Nemo is my name forevermore Nemo sailing home Nemo letting go Oh, how I wish...

I wish I had an angel For one moment of love I wish I had your angel tonight Deep into a dying day I took a step outside an innocent heart Prepare to hate me fall when I may This will hurt you like never before Old love they die hard Old lies they die harder I wish I had an angel For one moment of love I wish I had your angel Your virgin Marry undone I am in love with my lust Burning angelwings to dust I wish I had your angel tonight I`m going down so frail`n cruel Drunken disguise changes all the rules Old loves they die hard Old lies they die harder I wish i had an angel... Greatest thrill Not to kill But to have the prize of the night Hypocrite Wannabe friend 13th disciple who bertayed me for nothing! Last dance, first kiss Your touch my bliss Beauty always comes with dark thoughts I wish i had an angel

Tonight, working was hell on earth! I was walking around feeling like i was in a little bobble of my own. I could hardly hear what anyone was saying to me, and could hardly answer. By the end of the day i have almost lost my voice completely. And none of those stupid ass costemers understood a damn thing! Man i cant belive anyone caould be as stupid as some of the people we have had in tonight! One man was actualy ranting and yelling at me cose the diesel pump had leaked a little bit of diesel on his hand. Like there was anything i could do about that on a sunday night. I just told the grumpy old man that the bathroom was down there on the left side. And started to deal with the next person.