THAT Ahole's blog: "Jokes"

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman…Many females use a date rape drug on the market called “Beer!” This drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large “kegs.” “Beer” is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only get a guy to consume a few units of “Beer” and then simply ask him home for “NO STRINGS ATTACHED SEX!” Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several “Beers,” men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that “something bad” happened. Please! Forward this warning to every male you know! If you fall victim to this “Beer” scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you, just look up “Golf Courses” in the phone book!

One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey kiss in his mouth and asked, "Do you know what it is?" "No, I don't," said the little boy. "Okay, I'll give you a clue. It's the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work." Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled, “Spit it out!!! It’s a piece of Ass!!!"

A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down. A lady cashier walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open." This is not a phrase men normally use, so he went on his way looking a bit puzzled. When he was about done shopping, a man came up and said, "Your fly is open." He zipped up and finished his shopping. He then intentionally got in the line to check out where the lady was that told him about his "barracks door". He was planning to have a little fun with her. When he reached her counter he said, "When you saw my barracks door open did you see a soldier standing in there at attention?" The lady (being smarter than a man) thought for a moment and said, "No, no I didn't. All I saw was a disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags!!!

There was this Mathmatics Professor, and he was not feelin' well with his mariage. One day, he e-mailed his wife and said, "Dear, you are 54, and there are some things that you just can't provide for me. I hope that you are not mad or offended by this letter, but by the time you read this, I will be in the Ridge Motel with my 18 yr old Student Assistant. I will be home tonight!" When he got to the Hotel, there was a fax there waiting for him that read, "Dear, you too are 54 yrs old, and I just wanted to let you know, that by the time you read this, the 18 yr old plumber that stopped to fix the drain and I are havin' an affair. Since you are such an esteemed Mathematics Professor, you will appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many more times than 54 into 18! Don't wait up!"