Eros's blog: "Insight Into Me"

Been back at an old job this week, hopefully will be staying for a little while this time to. Now, the thing is, the job is at an all girls school, ages 11 to 16. I don't think I'll ever get used to the noise they make, holy christ it is horrendous. Especially one teacher's classes, poor guy, no matter how hard he tries hardly any of them listen. It's painful to hear in more ways than one.

Ok, so this isn't really to do with me, but I thought of this a couple of days ago. When I went to my dad's funeral last year, I noticed that everything with his name on was spelt Brian. Now I'd never seen it like that and questioned my uncles about it. Turns out, he always spelt it wrong, always Bryan. Why, who knows. Just strikes me as kinda weird.

Yep, that time of year. The constant questions, what do you want, I don't know what to get you etc. And to be honest, I don't really want anything. Partly because I actually don't, other than one or two cds perhaps. But mostly because I'm going to have very little money to get anyone anything. I know that's not the point, but it just doesn't feel right.

I said this before a while back, but I feel the need to reiterate to everyone who may have affected me since then. Sometimes I wonder if anyone realises how much they mean to me on here. Sure it's a website blah blah blah, but to me, and especially my family list, you're more family than most of my actual family. I take from your lives, use it to better myself, use it to live up to who I should be. You are all my role models and I want to do my best to actually be as good a person as you all are. I feel ashamed that I've done so little compared to you all, good or bad. I've missed so much and being around here, around good people has taught me just that. I say this again now because of the influences of you all, and just want you to understand I do what I do and say what I say out of admiration and love. So this is not just a website to me, no matter how many times I'm told it is.

As it's still halloween, kinda, and I'm bored, here's a novel trick or treat type thing I just thought up. Anyone who reads this either says treat, and gets a small fu-shop gift (am fubroke) or trick, and I have to answer any question you can think of for me, and I have to post my answer in the blog itself as a comment. so there you go, let the games begin

This turned out long so understandable if you don't read it. Thank you if you do. As I've mentioned previously, I was kinda the punching bag at school. But I knew when to stick up for myself, and my mates. There was this one guy, had like 2 friends 'cause everyone hated the little bastard. Walking in to a building one day he decided to barge past me and a mate, even though there was plenty of room. Thinking, sod you mate, I barged him back. Of course, thinking he was this tough guy he got pissed off and tried to push me around. Me being stronger and having the weight adavantage, was winning. So that failing, he pulled my jumper over my head, so I couldn't see him, and just started punching me in the face. Obviously I couldn't see so couldn't really do much about it, but was trying to grab him and push him away. Here's my favourite part, and no I'm not lieing. When a teacher finally pulled him away, and I managed to pull my jumper off of my head, he had this stupid "That's what you get" look on his face, and I just laughed at him and said he punched like a girl, and kept saying it. In truth, I really hadn't felt a thing. I'd hurt myself more trying to grab him, had bent a fingernail back almost in half, f*** that hurt. But that dude looked mad as hell when I started laughing. I took the piss even more at lunch time. I went out of school, and he and his two mates followed me around for half an hour trying to trip me up and goad me in to another fight. I laughed the whole time. He got madder. This only stopped when a coupla mates of mine spotted it and walked with me. But yeah, that's pretty much my only ever physical fight, even though fight may be the wrong word.

I know I thanked everyone individually, but I just wanted to put down how much it meant to me to come online and see the amount of messages it had. Just really made my day. So anyways, thank you all again, I know great peoples.

Can't stay much longer, but wanted to put this down before I forgot. Should friendship be a two way thing? I ask this for two reasons; 1. It came up in another blog I was just in 2. I notice that no one talks to me, because I generally don't strike up conversation first. Now I'm fine with this, 'cause I know it is partly my fault and I could do more. But some people aren't fine with it, and if you are friends with that person you should realise it and accept that that is part of who they are. Not condemn them for being antisocial, rude etc. Anyways, that's about it, so thanks for reading.

Joined: October 1, 2006 Cannot believe I've been on this site for that long, seems that time has just flown past. The good has always outweighed the bad for me though and I have had good friends since almost the first moment and up to now. None of which I will ever forget. Sad as it may seem, I fit in better with people here than outside of here, but it's better than fitting in nowhere. So thank you all for allowing me to be me, and for putting up with it.

46 ODD Things about Me Less odd, more just random 1) Favorite objects in your room? Pen Collection 2) Have you ever drank tequila? nope 3) Do you own guns?? Nope 4) What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic?...... Hedgehog (don't have 'em here) 5) Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? No generally 6) What do you think of hot dogs? alright one every few months. 7) Favorite song? changes week to week 8) What do you prefer to drink in the morning? water 9) Can you do push ups? maybe 1 or 2 10) Can you do a chin up? If i'm lucky 11) What's your favorite piece of jewelry? only have two things, wouldn't say either was a favourite. 12) Do you like bleu cheese? nope 13) Ever been in a car wreck? nope 14) What's one trait that you hate about yourself? Low self esteem 15) What is your biggest fear? being alone for the rest of my life. 16) Middle name? Adam? 17) Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? Bored, bored and...er...bored 18) Name 3 things you bought today? roast chicken thighs, pack of biscuits and a chocolate bar 19) Name 3 drinks you drink regularly? water pretty much 20) Current worry? Moneh 21) Current hate right now? rudeness 22) How did you bring in the New Year? How am I meant to remember that? 23) Where would you like to be right now? Bloomingdale Georgia 24) Name three people who will complete this? idc 25) Do you own slippers? Not anymore 26) What shirt are you wearing? adidas t-shirt 27) Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? dunno 28) Can you whistle? most of the time 29) Would you be a pirate? Seasick pirates not too useful. Maybe a land pirate 30) What songs do you sing in the shower? don't 31) Favorite girl's name? n/a 32) Favorite boy's name? n/a 33) What's in your pocket? air 34) Last person that made you laugh? someone 35) Best bedsheets as a child? only had plain ones. 36) Worst injury you've ever had? Sprained wrists. 37) Do you love where you live? it's alright 38) How many TVs do you have in your house? 2 39) Who is your loudest friend? shaun, somtimes. 40) How many dogs do you have? 0 41) Does someone have a crush on you 3 according to fubar. idk about r/l 42) What is your favorite candy? all of it :P 43) Favorite Sports Team? Tottenham Hotspur (football/soccer). 44) Where is the next place you want to travel see #23 45) What were you doing 12 AM last night? on here I think 46) What was the first thing you thought this morning? I'm awake too early