Virgo30's blog: "Gothic Poems"

A dragon flew out of his cave, and killed a corpulent knave. He ate the fat man in four bites, then said, "Oh, that didn't taste right." The dragon sat by his cave wall, and wished he had Pepto Bismal.

My Grandma died and left me her cat. That puffy black cat sat on my lap. Now this was not going to do, because cats I'm allergic to. So I smacked the cat with a bat, and sent her on to Grandma.

"Unforgiven" And the sky, it burns like fire My world it comes apart You're up there now, just laughing, Laughing 'Cause you ripped out my heart Slowly I am giving in My heart is black as coal You've left me cold and empty You've destroyed my very soul So now I stand here screaming My mind is lost to rage My only wish For death to come So I can turn that page. By:kiss-bang_x@hotmail.com "These Thoughts" So many thoughts that run through my head, so many of them that had me wishing i were dead. You came to me so fast, but now your gone and in the past. I loved you so much that it kills to live, so many days i wish it were you to have lived. When i think about those days we were together, our love was strong and could be held on forever. Was it me that made you die, those thoughts of suicide. Oh how i wish you were by my side. For the fear of my fathers blows may be harder, i maybe able to see you sooner. please come back to me, for without you i have nothing. all i have are these thoughts of death, and you holding me til i take my last breathe. Please come back to me as these words i am screaming, i want to be with you instead of me dreaming. By:jenny_evans_06@hotmail.com "Untitled" Her lies of smiles and blankets on tears Every emotion she shaddows to hides Covering her sadness and all her fears No one knows the torture she feels inside Shes losing all hope on the life she knew A life full of happiness and laughter Forgetting after all shes been through Not wanting to see what will come after She hides herself behind a fake smile Slowly shes fading away in her mind And no one noticed after a while Looking for hope she wants so much to find Her lies of smiles and blankets on tears Covering her sadness and all her fears By: Helena "Tortured Soul" Inside I am lonely, Outside I am lost, I want to stop the torture, No matter what the cost. The feeling of despair, Matches with the pain, I need to stop the bleeding, Before I go insane. The horror grows inside me, My pain is its thrill, To be free from this course, Has always been my will. By:Moonserpentfire@aol.com "Untitled" I WAKE UP AND I CRY WHY I WISH TIME WOULD FLY BYE MY HORRIBLE LIFE I THE DARKNESS A MAN IS HEARD NO MORE IN THE SHADOWS OF NOTHING THE WALKING SOULS ARE THE ONLY REAL THINGS HOLDING US UP. BY:Detectivejoe13@aol.com "Untitled" A twisted wreck of metal A shattered pane of glass The moaning of the victims That won't live through the crash The train's jumped the tracks The ground feeds on blood All of this symbolism Is lost in fresh mud. The train wreck's not real, But the blood from it is. My life is the wreck My soul heavy with sins. This blood's on my hands The blood is my own I'm drowning in failure My shroud's already sewn. I smell the fresh dirt That is piled upon me I'm buried alive And I cannot see Yet another symbol My life's falling apart Changes must be made I feel pain in my heart I must pull out the knife That I myself placed there But it's hard to reach my back a second time. And life's never fair A couch supports And Welfare provides But these aren't the things That create REAL life. By:whena_poopana@hotmail.com "Save Me" Cut my hand and the blood falls down but the pain never matters because it is gone from me Carve into my sorrow and bleed away the invisabel pain no one sees It's real Another freak you may call me while screaming in my face that I dont belong Another time I have to find where my life will lead, no where to go, no place to be free I have to save my self because no one will save me Save me The end is never far away but bleeding make the feelling of death calm down your fears The same verse played out your whole life has save you so many time why not try to change a few played out lines Another freak you may call me while screaming in my face that I dont belong Another time I have to find where my life will lead, no where to go, no place to be free I have to save my self because no one will save me Save me By:blackspidersilverweb@hotmail.com "Death Deserved" what have you done to me? a shadow of pain as thoughts vanish. once we savored paradise, untainted and open, but your soul died. a dark cloud of emotions - follow hate, follow death, love left to die. in a storm of hatred, i deserve this By:S1ipknOtfan@aol.com "SURRENDER" In the abyss of time you've been played like a toy the rhythm of the pendulum will rip you a void mind,structure,and spirit you begin to lose control love will forfeit you to a place that's damp and cold empty and alone hiding in the dark you've suffered this before with a decaying heart fastened in your thoughts imprisoned behind bars crimson gore will trickle down those pale-dead arms nightmares of the past entities you've lost happiness and joy frozen, unable to defrost eyelids linger shut betrayal of light because of the massacres you surrender to the night By:FOREAPER@aol.com

Home About Me Beliefs and Opinions RIP JASON My Journal Suicide letter I had written Childhood Of Pain My Memoirs Of Death ~NEW~ My Creations of the Night My Creations Cont.. Gothic,Vampire,etc , Poetry Page 1 Gothic,Vampire,etc , Poetry Page 2 Gothic,Vampire,etc , Poetry Page 3 Reccommended Music for Listening Sites That Have Caught My Interest. Movie and Book Reviews Quotes My Happy Stuff Stuff from Past Relationships ~All For You~ Contact Me "My Life" by:Mike Healey <bean_316@hotmail.com> Yes, I say to her Obviously your right, Understand my pain Reach into my heart. Sail into my mind Inside you will find, Trouble is brewing Everlasting suffering. Interior painstains Seek out my sorrow. Sail deeper Help me be free, Iquisite delight Troubling me.............. "Untitled" by: blingbling bunny My soul spills into bloody tears of joy, just looking upon you, your eyes so deep, our love so true, i wish i could hold your heart till the end of death and beyond, in the dark eternity mist, but forever is a long time, even then my you shall have my will in your fist, you say you will never leave, yet i still worry, that time will betray us, and this love will turn to furry, but i love every side of you, even the madness, so i will try to keep it away, and drive away the sadness, eternity is a long time away, so i will hold you now, and if forever comes, you will be there to show me how, we can overcome the "good" together as one, always apart of the wickedness, until finality is done, so as destiny unfurls, and this passion burns, you will be in me, as the dimension turns, it cannot be broken, not even by the one(s) above, it will never end, our wicked burning love. "My Kindly Haunting" by:Blackheart093@aol.com My body may be gone But my spirit lives on The sun will always shine And you will always be mine As night follows day My spirit is here to stay Never Apart I will live on in your heart Until we are once more united Our loving words once more recited I will love you always Long after our earthly days We will walk with The Lord Hard times we have endured But our love will see us through In Heaven we can start anew... "SURRENDER" by:FOREAPER@aol.com In the abyss of time you've been played like a toy the rhythm of the pendulum will rip you a void mind,structure,and spirit you begin to lose control love will forfeit you to a place that's damp and cold empty and alone hiding in the dark you've suffered this before with a decaying heart fastened in your thoughts imprisoned behind bars crimson gore will trickle down those pale-dead arms nightmares of the past entities you've lost happiness and joy frozen, unable to defrost eyelids linger shut betrayal of light because of the massacres you surrender to the night "Untitled" we gaze at crimson skies beneath the chilling stillness as darkness descends, seeping silently into the cracks the earth crumbles beneath the weight of emptiness and everything slowly fades away quietly deteriorating rotting into oblivion but yet, we stand amidst the desolation, awash in effulgent light as you scream in ecstasy and i fall to my knees to deplore the angelic death intoxicated with its splendor, we tremble in the arms of sorrow and lethargically waste away Ninamunchi372@aol.com Red Tears I drink water and her blood is what i taste. I look in the mirror and i see her face. I dream and see her crying red tears, I see her trying to stab away her fears. The red fills the tub she lays in, Its happened before but i see it all again. I hear her voice when im on the phone, I see her when im alone at home. Red tears were on her face when she cried, Red tears covered her body when she died. Courtney Dorman <mizzthang122@yahoo.com> " untitled" >I used to love this world. >It always was in my youth, >a happy place to flee to. >The people cared for one another, >needed each other to survive. >That concept has died. >People don't care anymore, >they step on each other, >just so they can make it to the top. > >And as my youth faded, >hell seemed to rise. >It seemed to devour all that i held dear, >consuming with each bite, >bits of my life. >Family issues worsened, >people to help were called, >they seemed to be the only ones who cared. > >As years went on I forgot, >the many memories of my past, >hiding them in the darkest place of my mind. >Wondering if it was I, >I used to cry. >Thinking I was nothing, >useless to this earth, >always seeing those who were so much, >so precious to everyone everywhere. >A darkend veil I used to keep, >always covering from sight, >all the things I feared to meet. >But now my youth has gone away, >and I no longer see the good, >the happy, the love. > >A riot has broken, >proven my fear, >brought to life the very thing that I despair. >And as a child I used to love this world, >but now I see it as it truely is, >a waste for time, >a waste for life to only die in the end. >For as I sit about to die, >I see I did not love this world, >rather hated it before the day I was born. shirley walker <ssbwalker@msn.com> "The forgotten" Screaming from deep inside, no foundation to hold. Life scrambles about, with no salvation seekable. Breathing deeply, they stare, they watch, yet still life does no notice. Why? Why does life pass so quickly, No great accomplishments are made, unspeakable memories crowd them, heartache and sorrow, unwant and pain. They sit, they stare, the cold swallows them, the frost bites at them, yet life takes no interest. Life leaves them; deserts them, leaving them so many cares, so many wonders, but still no speck of a significant life. -s "forsaken" Look at her, her face drips blood, pouring tears of acid rain. Heartache all among the ruins, lost in a world of confusion, minds all crazed and broken parted, faces grey and rotting corpses. Sitting lost among the living, watching, waiting, needing something. Fire from hell itself, never ending to be out. Fear gripped faces of the future, longing to feel the warmth, look around the world of living, wonder why there's nothing there. People round the world are calling, walking into danger's core. Laughter gone and submersed, screams anger from inside, seize the darkness, come down under. Watch the moments grow stronger, looking down i see your pain, anger deep in core of man, it wishes to be free to wander, longing for something to hold. Watch the clock as it ticks by, death is coming in with every breath, wait a minute, stop the yelling, voices start to fade and wander, calling out as they go by. People wishing, people dreaming, saying prayers no one hears. looking up they see the light, going down the pain grows stronger. For one moment it seems right, for one second they can't wait. Screaming as they go down under, pain is coming, they can feel. Watching, waiting and wondering, looking for something to grasp. Asking when will it be over, getting nothing in return. -s "Deadly poison" deadly poison, oh how it wrecks, billowing in from beneath the cracks, filling my lungs with revenge, taking it out on me til the end. Knowing my crime it digs even deeper, stoping my heart from beating forever. Closing my lungs so i take my last breath. Having done the worst, it wants me to see, that my choice brought only pain, the pain it now brings. Deadly poison i breathe in As i start to choke, losing my life in a box full of smoke. sitting alone, hands behind back, Deadly poison being pumped in, for what they call my execution. -s shirley walker <ssbwalker@msn.com> you don't know me, no one does, you all have this fantasy about what and who you think I am, well i'm not that person. outside i put on this fake smile, this fake personality, it's not me, it never will be. inside i'm dying, breaking down, at night when no one hears, i lie in bed and cry. why do i feel like this? i don't know. i try to explain how i feel, but you don't understand. you don't know me. no one does. Why must everyone be so perfect? So skinny and so pretty, so stereotyped And so FAKE Why must everyone have to have the perfect identity and figure to be beautiful? Why does this world have this one image we should all be? Sheep aren't beautiful Image hunters aren't pretty People who are exactly the same aren't interesting Beautiful people are people who embrace who they really are and can see beyond looks Peoples image comes from their heart - from the truth And interesting people are individuals with real things to say and beliefs of their own. Beccy Goss <falling_kisses@hotmail.com> "If You See What You See" If you see what you see its just an evil dream, a dream that wont set me free, If you see what you see dont worry its just me trying to escape this evil dream that i see If you see what you see help me get me out of this scary scary Dream. By:Stephanie T. "Hard Times" Blue and Green children scream, crying out to be set free, No one knows how hard it is, to be trapped in a place like this Its hard to sleep,hard to eat its hard to keep myself from killing me Hard to love,hard to care, no on knows its hard to bare. By:Stephanie T. "Dying for You" I scream out for the love of my life, as he walks into the cold dark night, While he left me there in my knees, begging him please to stay with me for eternity, I lay on the florr crying tears of blood, cutting my self as if im not one, Waiting for my dark handsome prince to come take my hand and save me,from killing me, And to take me out of this Dark Hell i feel. By:Stephanie T. GothicHyena2010@aol.com "my new attitude" today is the day when i started to pray and i ask god to help me be ok, my life for so long has been very strange so today i decided i needed a change, the Dr. i saw told me that i will soon die that is when i knew i was living a lie, i was so determined that this was fate i knew at this very moment it wasn't to late i was going to get healthy and lose this weight, my life is very important to me thats when i looked at myself and began to see, the Dr. was right when he said i would soon die he said my friend this is no lie, i have kids and a husband to think about thats when i realized there wasn't a doubt this is what life is all about, i need to be around for my family and love and cherish them like i should at this point in my life i knew i could, my friends tell me all the time christine you are someone special and so kind, so next time when i start feeling sad i will take a good look at myself and see what i do have, i sometimes wonder what would i do to myself when im feeling sad and blue, kids,family and friends are all i have so my life without these people would be so bad, so next time when something doesn't feel quite right i will look around and thank god for making everything in my life so beautiful and bright..... signed "new begining" CBabyGIRL4u2@aol.com "sadden eyes" dear mom why did you have yo leave me why did you have to die, i sit around and begin to cry i don't think it was fair that you had to die but my biggest question is w h y? , i miss you so much my body hurts to the touch, i want so badly to come and see you mom but, i am not sure how to get this done, my hubby ask me whats the matter, when he see's me sitting here crying, i told him i want to be with my mom, he looked at me with such alarm, he thinks im crazy and have lost my mind, he does not know that feel like im lost in time, well what i say about all that is i am under alot of pain and stress so people who don't know me im trying my best, i lost the most important person in my life and people are always giving me stupid advice, people don't quite understand how losing a loved one is forever gone they think i should just carry on, it is not that easy for me to be ok but i know i will be with my mom someday, it may be sooner than people think i could be gone in just a blink... "i love you mom" your loving daughter christina CBabyGIRL4u2@aol.com "Gift Of Death" I quickly tire of hearing you scream, as I glare at you my eyes beam. You do not know but soon will be dead and will regret every word you said. As I stab you the knife I twist, to feel the death I long have mist. This gift I give you I hand you with pleasure, and this memory I will forever treasure. "Inner Demons" These voices in my head just wont go away. Everytime I ask them to leave ,they stay. I dont know how much more I can take, I wish they would materialize to be pierced with a stake. Having these voices isn't very mundane, but my mind will forever be their domain. Goth_666@windstorm.com Sarena Layers of Myself Let me out Set me free I need to be set free I'm burning up inside from crying about nothing. Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out. Let me fly Let my wings expand Let my feathers fly away into the sunset Let me free out of this cage, it is too small. Take me away Take me away from this place Take me away from him Take me home with you I need out of this place It is to complicated and scary. Leave me alone Just let me free for a day or two I need time to figure out who are my friends and who aren't. Just let me out, set me free, let me fly I'm a bird that needs to migrate south, so let me free let me go I'll be back at summer. I promise I will be back in time for hot summer days to go jump the ice cold pool. I'm a polar bear just let me sleep my anger off during the winter. I promise I will be back for those hot ball games with sunflower seeds. I promise I will love you for ever, just give me some time, give me some space to think. (F)(K)Gurly(K)(F) Epton <rottweilerlover_today@msn.com> I FEEL U IN THE DEPTHS OF MY SOUL U FUFILL MY LIFE U HAVE THE VOICE OF A GOD I TRUST IN U B CAUSE UR ALL I HAVE LEFT U MAKE THE RULZ AND I FOLLOW U R THE VOICE THAT LEADS ME U R MY EYES U R IN MY SOUL U R MY MIND AS OF TODAY U R ME AND NO LONGER WILL FIGHT U BUT I WILL WORSHIP U Da Kitt¥kÅt <a_girl_with_attitude_87@hotmail.com> "A woman borne of blackest heart her soul in midnight seldom sleeps I felt her coldness from the start into my dreams her shadow creeps She sings to me a wicked song of cloudless nights with quarter moon the winter winds blew hard and long but never clear away the gloom Her changing shape does terrify and I cant help but want to run on ravens wings while on the fly the demons hunt till morning comes From her eyes a white hot light each tear a drop of molten steele her venom spat in brilliant bright so done with sweet demonic zeal Blessed by he of hellish rank unholy love,they two were cursed with open wounds that truly stank the virgin mother would not nurse Why am I the chosen one in fear of being unredeemed devoured by the fallen son who showed no mercy as I screamed With crimson ink on tattered page in blood thy name is written down my soul condemned with savage rage by queen of night in thorny crown".Words Ken Amaro.. Amaro, Ken <ken.amaro@meus.mea.com> "silence" flowers and tainted blood mixed with suppressed love makes me feel used makes me feel abused i scream out in the darken light to make this right it eats away causing decay i try to run but i'm trapped in chains it's all the same make it go away there's only 1 way out now the knife hugs my throat embracing for the slide the blood skips down and i start to fade it's turning black there's no turning back this is what i wanted silence death's reward. the bleeding heart "sickness of the heart" baffle me ryming riddles in the dark pain needs slipping demons staining mark shattered lies forgotten tearing me apart no hope hating no blessed new start false tears unknown death's killing dart jades soul alone sickness of the heart the bleeding heart BDeath88@aol.com pain i remember the days we had to sneek to see each other but now its no bother you came to me and wouldn't let me be i'm all alone there's noone here you use me and take away my fear you rip my shirt and i start to cry but my tears have gone dry you rip my pants i get scared it was just a dare i'm in pain you don't care as long as you are pleased i'm shouting in pain you push harder and then you get tired so you stop i can't cry my tears are dry i feel hate cause all you do is rape unwanted I don't care flames are burning satin's returnig fire blares still there's noone who cares it's like hell on earth it's like satin's rebirth open your eyes can't you see the cloudy skys? no light shines through i don't know what to do you just don't care so i just sit in stare i don't know where i have fallen to but i still call out to you it's all so confusing your words seem so abusing i try not to care cause i know you wanna be there unwanted BDeath88@aol.com MISTY My name is Misty I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made Made my daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can'tspeak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long. When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks arent home When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight. Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And I run for the door. He's already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall. I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor My name is Misty And I am but three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me. ~SOURCE UNKNOWN IF KNOWN PLEASE CONTACT ME~ IN DEATH I HAUNT YOU I walked through the ashes as this is where you left me for dead. Setting ablaze our souls You poured the fuel upon my sleeping head. I screamed as I awoke feeling my flesh burn from outside to within. I watched you laughing at me watching with your evil little grin. I fell to the ground as you walked through that door Leaving me in my agony as you left me burning like never before. My flesh turned to ashes my bones turned to dust Only wanting me for selfish uses I was a victim of your evil lust. BUt my soul lives on through shadows in the corner of your eye Always watch your back because I am never far behind Can you feel the fear as I stroke the back of your neck My ghost will haunt you forever Until it is your time when it is your burning death. I hide in your shadows the darkness in your room forever to bring your nightmares turn your bright days darknened gloom. You left me here in ashes you left me here to DIE For now I walk in silence amongst the shadows in your eyes. I will always be watching you now my love Poetry From The Starlite Cafe IN DEATH I HAUNT YOU Subject: The Story Behind "The Room" 17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for the Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting. It was his turn to lead the discussion so he sat down and wrote. He showed the essay, titled "The Room" to his mother, Beth, before he headed out the door. "I wowed 'em." he later told his father, Bruce. "It's a killer, It's the bomb. It's the best thing I ever wrote." It also was the last. Brian's parents had forgotten about the essay when a cousin found it while cleaning out the teenager's locker at Teary Valley High School. Brian had been dead only hours, but his parents desperately wanted every piece of his life near them -- the crepe paper that had adorned his locker during his senior football season, notes from classmates and teachers, his homework. Only two months before, he had handwritten the essay about encountering Jesus in a file room full of cards detailing every moment of the teen's life. But it was only after Brian's death that Beth and Bruce Moore realized that their son had described his view of heaven. "It makes such an impact that people want to share it. You feel like you are there." Mr. Moore said. Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, -- the day after Memorial Day He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off Bulen-PierceRoad in Pickaway County and struck a utility pole. He emerged from the wreck unharmed but stepped on a downed power line and was electrocuted. Brian seemed to excel at everything he did. He was an honor student. He told his parents he loved them "a hundred times a day", Mrs. Moore said. He was a star wide receiver for the Teary's Valley Football team and had earned a four-year scholarship to Capital University in Columbus because of his athletic and academic abilities. He took it upon himself to learn how to help a fellow student who used a wheelchair at school. During one homecoming ceremony, Brian walked on his tiptoes so that the girl he was escorting wouldn't be embarrassed about being taller than him. He adored his kid brother, Bruce, now 14. He often escorted his grandmother, Evelyn Moore, who lives in Columbus, to church. "I always called him the "deep thinker", Evelyn said of her eldest grandson. Two years after his death, his family still struggles to understand why Brian was taken from them. They find comfort at the cemetery where Brian is buried, just a few blocks from their home. They visit daily. A candle and dozens of silk and real flowers keep vigil over the gravesite. The Moore's framed a copy of Brian's essay and hung it among the family portraits in the living room. "I think God used him to make a point. I think we were meant to find it and make something out of it, " Mrs. Moore said of the essay. She and her husband want to share their son's vision of life after death. "I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven. I know I'll see him again someday." Mrs. Moore said. "It just hurts so bad now." "The Room" In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching. A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger" "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to write each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature. When I pulled out the file marked "Songs I have listened to," I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of musicbut more by the vast time I knew that file represented. When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: "No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it. Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh. And then I saw it. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand. And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him. No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me. Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no, " as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side. He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood up, and He led me out of the room. ~SOURCE UNKNOWN~ Hate loves &Love hates: My heart is torn and cannot be mended My thoughts that roam my mind are no longer splendid To love is to hate and to hate is to love To that special four letter word I will push and shove My breathing is weak and I cannot see Your face is there when I drop to my knee Let God have me now... ..Blood drips from my brow Taste the hate and feel how it is warm It welcomes well in its form My heart is torn and cold inside It rips open and lets forth a dark blooded tide It is "love" that has caused all this trouble And it is"love" that has made hate in my heart double If this word causes so much pain For this word why do others seek and try to gain? -Kimberly Lynn Rowland:9-17-02 Blood Filled Tears: Do you ever feel like you just want to die? Do you ever feel like all you want to do is cry? THis world is full of sinners and fakes They disguise themselves like Satan as a snake You trust someone they let you down You love someone they break your crown Fire burns in my soul My heart makes into coal Instead of salty watter blood fills my eyes And instead of smiles blood is all I'll cry. -Kimverly lynn Rowland:9-20-02 Ever Notice by John Lyell Ever noticed how a minute can seem so long? How it stands still when times are so wrong. Ever noticed how a minute can go so fast? In good times when you wish they would last. Ever notice how dark the skies can really be? On those nights when your feeling a little lonely. Ever notice how bright the skies can seem? When your not afraid to let yourself dream. Ever notice how love can break your heart? Moving in completely and ripping it apart. Ever notice how love can also set you free? Opening your eyes so you can see eternity. Ever notice how time can stand still? Haunting your mind and weakening your will. Ever notice how time can pass right by? Taking precious moments in a blink of an eye. Ever notice how life can be so unfair? Leaving pain and sorrows without even a care. Ever notice how life can be so sweet? Pieces coming together making us so complete. Ever notice when you love someone to much? Closer you try to get the further your out of touch. Ever notice when you love someone with all Makes everything else seems so small. For I have taken notice of all these things you see Because of all this love you have given to me. by: Tonya R. Ducksworth A thundering boom rolls through the park, setting trees afire. Buildings tumble in destruction, their ruins pile higher and higher. People writhe helplessly in the streets, screaming in terror and pain. All are begging for merciful Gods, who will come and stop the rain. The acidic rains that pour down, dropping living things like flies. This is a cruel game called war where everybody dies. In the year 2000, makind will start this war Then everybody will someday soon find death knocking at their door. When Twilight Fades Darkness falls. Lying in my bed I hear noises. Noises of the night. Images form on walls creating shapes For which only the imagination can depict. Shadows lurk somewhere in the darkness Away from the eyes of those who worship reality, And sounds that cannot be understood become objects of fear For those of us who must have an explanation for everything. The blissful hush (which some call peace) Is not the result of the night hours work, But is merely a beginning for a new way of life Which only the people of the night can understand; While the people of reality are ignorant of anything That lies beyond the sun. Angel Of Disgrace I wish my eyes were shut. Then I'd have no fears. Go through life With no hate or tears. Or if I were numb, I'd feel no pain. Never drowning in shadows, Or soaking in shame. Maybe an angel Feeling good so much, Then I wouldn't be scared Of love's sweet touch. Kissing me softly With one deep breath. Sweeping me into Eternity with the rest. I wish I wasn't Always so alone. Everybody's something I just want to go home. Nobody to talk to, They're all cloned and fake, And then there's me. Easy to break. They think I stand on a pedestal, Perfect picture in a frame. There's more to it. Underneath the mask there's shame. Horrible things Said and done, But nobody will listen. To them it's fun. I hold onto my anger Locked in a box. Chains all around it. Attached are locks. I wish there was a key To let it all out. But instead it builds up, Exploding without a doubt. Sometimes I want to scream So long that life escapes. Then I'd shut my eyes. I'd be the angel of disgrace. By: Janice Lynn I sit here day n night, wondering if what I am is really real if what I am is true am for real? Who am I? Do I know or do I try 2 b everything u want me 2 b? Am I n the army trying 2 give u my all n all? I dont know what I am or who I am or even who I want 2 b. all I no is Im what u want me 2 b n thats not me. Its got to stop. Its got to change. I cant b me 4 u anymore. I got 2 b me 4 me. Thats just how its got to b. Im tired of the shells, the shadows, the holes, the lies. Im tired of all the tears Ive cried. Im tired of running the race of endless pride. Its 4 u all the tears Ive cried. The more I want me 2 b 4 u is the more of me that gets lost n u. I dont no how 2 feel anymore. I dont no were I want 2 go or if I should think so. I dont no who Im going to b or what i want to b. all I know is who youve made me 2 b, but Im not 2 sure thats me. Im tired of thinking that suicide is 4 me. Isnt Christ suppose 2 b 4 me? Im tired of everything I do bin n vain. No matter what I do or how hard I try its never enough 4 me 2 b all 4 you. y do I have 2 b all 4 u? Who made that rule? Y does everything always have 2 b 4 u? Can it b 4 me 4 a change or is that against the rules? Im tired of living by the rules. Im tired of trying 2 tear down the walls. I want 2 b me 4 once with out having 2 think about bin me 4 u. is that allowed? Would I actually b me with out bin me 4 u? I think I jus want 2 learn how 2 b me 4 me, if thats ok with me bin me 4 u.

Alone Edgar Allen Poe From childhood's hour I havee not been As others were- I have not seen As others saw- I could not bring My passions from a common spring- From the same source I have not taken My sorrow- I could not awaken My heart to joy at the same tone- And all I lov'd- I lov'd alone- Then- in my childhood- in the dawn Of a most stormy life- was drawn From ev'ry depth of good and ill The mystery which binds me still- From the torrent, or the fountain- From the red cliff of the mountain- From the sun that 'round me roll'd In its autumn tint of gold- From the lightning in the sky As it pass'd me flying by- From the thunder, and the storm- And the cloud that took the form (When the rest of Heaven was blue) Of a demon in my view. Poem 41602 By:Wynter Moonlight A place of importance In the past and present Future arguments arise Children cry out To mothers that never existed Awareness of surroundings A bridge leading nowhere, Ending nowhere Above the parched grass A dog comes in from a hunt His defeated prey Hanging from his mouth Cars race by On a grassy path Night takes over day Taillights fade into the darkness LIFE Life is too short, to worry about tomorrow, Live each day the best we can. Yesterdays are past and filled with sorrow, Filled with things done and left undone. When we waken in the morning light, The minds are clear of the doubts and fears. Of yesterday's worry, pain and woe, We know God's promises are here. Love is a very precious thing, Given to man by God. Cannot be traded, bought or sold, It fills our hearts with Joy untold. Layers of Myself By: Pinky Let me out Set me free I need to be set free I'm burning up inside from crying about nothing. Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out. Let me fly Let my wings expand Let my feathers fly away into the sunset Let me free out of this cage, it is too small. Take me away Take me away from this place Take me away from him Take me home with you I need out of this place It is to complicated and scary. Leave me alone Just let me free for a day or two I need time to figure out who are my friends and who aren't. Just let me out, set me free, let me fly I'm a bird that needs to migrate south, so let me free let me go I'll be back at summer. I promise I will be back in time for hot summer days to go jump the ice cold pool. I'm a polar bear just let me sleep my anger off during the winter. I promise I will be back for those hot ball games with sunflower seeds. I promise I will love you for ever, just give me some time, give me some space to think. "Inner Demons" By:Sarena These voices in my head just wont go away. Everytime I ask them to leave ,they stay. I dont know how much more I can take, I wish they would materialize to be pierced with a stake. Having these voices isn't very mundane, but my mind will forever be their domain. " The Gift of Death" By: Sarena I quickly tire of hearing you scream, as i glare at you my eyes beam soon you do not know but will be dead and will regret every word you said as i stab you ,the knife i twist i will feel the death i have long missed deep down you know that you deserved it and i am the one who has reserved it this gift i give you, i hand you with pleasure and this memory i will forever treasure. Angel Of Darkness By Pearl Girl Angel of darkness come with me hold my hand, make me see Child of the night show me your ways drag me beneath to run through your maze Everything not bright nothing of light pull me into your world let me be your girl Cover my eyes led by the blind Just cuts, Just scrapes don't worry I'm fine Our blood blends together, our scars just the same The darkness so beautiful, day so mundane My love belongs to you, take it and make it true Your mystique to angelic, so soft, so deep Take me, make me, hold me, I'm yours Immersed in your esoteric beauty, my countenance pours The Blood Is The Rose By Josh All of you who set the night on fire, you all will go much much higher in darkness you can see in darkness you are free in darkness great things hide, in darkness step aside. then you will break on through Retire all of you people of the light, to night's purple legion. While you sleep, we will reap. You all have to sleep to dream, We live in one! You all live your life as one big lie. We know the truth. Tomorrow you will wake, And you will be surprised. Blood is the rose, of mysterious union. Burn By Kali Angel of death, come to me here. For sweet death I can feel is near. Destroy my spirit, burn my soul. Advenge my death, turn my body to coal. And as the children laugh, and as the children play. Let them know no fear. For the icy fingers of death, I can feel are near. Confessions Of The Dark Poet By Magnus Johnson Why does it hurt so bad? Why must I hurt so much? Why, am I, the one suffering? But then, I Stop! To think... It's not a curse. - It's a blessing. It's not a disease. - It's the Cure! For every one I look at, there're a thousand I don't see! My darkened mind will never change, just as none of them see me! The Darkness has got hold of me, and don't want to let go! And this will never happen just as long as they don't know! Now that I know the answer, I no longer ask you "why?"! Now I'm always laughing, nevermore to cry! Instead I give up to the night, to lead the life of pain and cold. To tell the tales about the dark, that has me in its hold! The Devil By Any Other Name... By Vamphyri By many names my kind have been known Strigoii, nosferatu, vrykolakis, Vukodlak, langsuir, and vampyr To name but a few. From many regions I have traversed From many passages of time I have marched Centuries pass from one to another Like sands through the glass Many tales have been written And passed down through mortal tongues Tales of me and mine kind Personally I have been called..... Leviathan, Diablolos, Prince of Darkness, and Lucifer. In this age I am known simply as Vamphyri I Am The Vampire By Tempie Garrett It was hot and cold sometimes new and always old I was young and bold My soul had been sold It was the trill of the devil's kill It is the wound that won't heal and he always comes against my will I am a creature of the night I always cause such a fright and there is a legend about my bite but with my race, it's alright I am the Vampire and I never tire My throat is continuously on fire So is this what they all admire? by Wynter Moonlight From the start you showed so much care, Slowly I realized the love we could share. I knew it would be hard to put my heart on the line But it was all worth it to make you mine. With you by my side I cannot go wrong Only you could have made my heart so strong. You showed me a different point of view So I opened my mind to understand you. Now I see the beauty of a wilted flower And the excitement you feel in a thunder shower. I love everything that makes you unique Especially the part only I get to see. In the past I made several bad choices But you drowned out the antagonizing voices. Because of you I have a better life And the strength I need to survive. Over time we have come a long way I've learned to treasure every day So while ever word of this is honest and real It still can't explain all the love that I feel. I pray that this miracle will always be- The miracle of you and me. That was me by:SID I am what I am I am who Ive become There were many But now in the only one The only one who The only one to Walk through the gates of hell And still Im alive to tell The blind leading the blind Thats how it went I saw the dark bars of these gates Sharp and jagged and bent They opened So on into the darkness I went Step a pawn step Thought after thought Seeming it seemed In my own mind I was caught I walked through the blood Still warm from the vanes it ran And drenched I was red I walked through hells flames Burnt and scared Yet not yet dead I walked all the way To the end of hells road Where only empty skulls lay I walked over the carcasses Left there to decay I found the evil kings throne Except for my shadow I was alone So a seat I did take Take I did to take a break Then a mirror did I see A mirror face down On the chairs arm beside me And a curious creature I may be I just sat there and wondered Where the devil the devil may be And why free to roam his realm He let me be A quick look in the mirror I took I took that look to see And see I did what blood and flame Had done to me Seeing this puzzled me For the devil I searched to see Was the devil That was me

Be still! You don't own me Be still! I am the one in control Be still! A prowling tiger moving in for the kill Be still! To late your dead and for once eternally Be still! Feeling of trying Love slowly dieing Pain growing stronger Depression having hold longer My life will know no love. You have to let life be in control Well I am the one in control I am going to allow death to rule I have always felt a burning pain The pain of letting my soul go. Crying tears of sadness knowing no gladness Surrounded by badness Death finally comes. Judgement meant for two But given to one An eternity of hell So much fun. Blue because of you Tears cried for two No more pain ever again I will never give in. If love hurts than why do you continue to let the things of pain continue. You say you love me But why can't you see I've given you my heart 100% free. The pain of depression I know is real These feelings I have you cannot feel My hands will be clean of your pain Your blood, my hands, will not be stained. "Murder" Death that cannot be found Blood stained carpets found all around. The crime that was committed Unsolved the answer never to be found. I cannot give but yet still live I dare not to venture into the light Because there is only good in the night I care not for many things on this place My feelings my own still a disgrace .....~ Daydreamers dreaming Birds singing Sunlight brightness Light shown all around Look at the angel I have found Her eyes like diamonds her face like love She showed me the good things in light but still i must say I prefer the night we each try to compromise with decisions we make .......~ Sadness not gladness knowing only tears scars can show the pain from all past years These scars they will not ever heal things I carry. Depression a word I know of a feeling opposite of love misunderstood by a mass multitude feeling only sorrow not wanting morrow needing to know other human touch giving not taking nearly as much as others around you have done "Untitled" If people cared for me I would care for them. I speak but am not heard. I am present but not counted. I accept my ways, I accept how I am and how I always will be, nothing. I live the day as if was my last and the nights as if they are days. I forgave others, but they did not me. I loved a precious few, but all I got was forget you. What I need is not an angel but someone to love like an angel. I loathe the light and exalt the darkness . I fear the known and welcome the unknown . Why hold on and continue this struggle? Why don't I just allow my not known life to be known in my own death? "Me" I sit here writing to none but myself for I am the only one who cares. My family says they love me, but yet treat me like a slave. Perhaps my dark style of life is the result of their love. Well thanks to them I welcome death and hate life. May God destroy my soul, for my life has no purpose. It is finished. "My Love in Life." My love for life does not exist. My mind demands me to insist. To wake up in a world of sorrow I expect the same from t'morrow. I have but one joy in my life. She will make a man happy as a wife. Surely for her I would die. But with her sadness I would cry. I asked for someone I could treat like an angelnot to be an angel. Instead I got both and blessed my God. My love has been reassembled. Past can tell its been remembered. My human side is coming back. My monster ways are dieing. Thanks babygirl your the only one whos trying. "Low" Not feeling high Angry at giving in Not knowing whats above Feeling down Under many Below lots. Untitled Openly I accept death Wanting to breath no more I seek the sight of My own blood on the floor I challenge life I play with death I wish not to be My pain can't you see The depression has ended Soon also will my life. "Giving" Not wanting at all Loaning to all Not taking Not wishing for Only wanting to give. "Pain" Not feeling love No God above Below I may go Heaven I can't see Only Hell will let me be One of importance One of. . . . . .

A time to die When all hope has past And all that lies ahead is misery Is there any point in continuing to fight Time always runs out eventually for the lonely Single meals heated in the microwave Single seats on planes surrounded by happy voices Only half a lifetime But its time to call an end Euthanasia would be a simple solution But they make it harder for human kind No lethal injection to take away the pain Nothing to lose, nothing to gain Just drifting through the days Waiting for something to happen But it never does, it never does, So all I do is wait in vain A dull, nagging, long endured pain The pain of lost opportunities The pain of stupid mistakes Only the foolish wait for their lives to change You have to make it happen So take the knife And end this life And come tomorrow There will be time for sorrow It is easy to die when you write it down Put down the pen and wipe away that frown Go to sleep and dream of death Go to sleep and dream of death One day your dream will last forever... Your dream will last forever....forever...forever

He was an outsider They called him a freak at school But this didn't worry him He had always been an outsider Wrapped in a veil of darkness His secrets lay hidden away He played the guitar He learnt a few chords And started to write his own songs He listened to Nightwish and Within Temptation I felt a bond, kindred spirits He welcomed the darkness into his soul Soon he would try to find a place in the world He attended a few gothic nightclubs And made a few friends They decided to form a band Their following grew They performed in small gigs around their hometown And then further a field around the whole of Norway Soon they were climbing the charts Their album went to number one They started to perform at large festivals The fans could be counted in the hundreds of thousands This child was lonely no more A hundred thousand kindred spirits calling out his name So many lonely souls looking for a guiding light All united in a moment of tranquility and enlightenment

I lived in darkness Withdrawn from modern life My mind was full of negativity And my mood was depressed I can relate to the melancholic poets And the gothic literature of Edgar Allan Poe These lost souls are misunderstood This is not a quest for evil But a search for positive energy I will come out of this stronger Wiser and more sympathetic I felt so restrained by modernity By the pressure to conform and look good I took a razor and cut through the superficial layer To get in touch with my soul I had to risk losing my life To realise how precious it is Now I am fully restored A cloak of darkness surrounds me I see the world in crystal clear vision Droplets of blood fall from my eyes A memory of the sadness I endured A bright new spirit guides me But the darkness will always be there To remind me how bright these days are

The pills and razor blade rest at my side This is not the end but the beginning I have had my low points I have taken a few pills in the past Only to obliterate the world from my mind A few moments of peace Before everything comes crashing down Disjointed memories of an ambulance and a hospital Drifting in and out of consciousness How in God’s name has it come to this? I reached out to so many souls But they were too busy living their own lives Moments of enlightenment followed by days of depression But that was the past Today is the dawning of a new reality I have taken all that this world can throw at me The pills and razor blade still rest at my side But they are not going to see any action tonight It is a night of silent contemplation I put everything back in their proper place This world can be a better place I will fight on a little longer The pills and razor blade will always be there My silent friends who lead me into darkness I am ready to stare into the light At least for one more day