2007, it has been an interesting year for me. I have allowed many into private areas of my heart, some, more than others and I even opened areas there that I have never allowed anyone.
Please know that if I gave you a hug, a kiss, told you I love you, said I accepted you as you are, or even shared myself physically with you, I did so to share with you a part of myself. I have a great respect for each and everyone of you.
I know I have failed some friends and I cannot change the past. I can only say I am sorry...and even then, that may never be enough, especially when it was those friends that helped me keep on keeping on through some rough areas. My pride, my ego, my loss of self, and neediness pushed some away. To them, I say thank you, for without you saying what you said, doing what you did... well... I do hope that perhaps we can rekindle our friendship in the future, I have not given up.
From the year 2007, I shall carry memories of loss, love, laughter, stupidity, new experiences, joy, and grief. I have made friends, lost friends, renewed friendships, and missed opportunities of becoming the friend I should have been. I have made good choices and poor choices (and boy were they really suck ass poor choices!). But that is all the past. It has been real and it has been fun... can't say that it has been real fun. I have had some very good times and some very sad times but then, so has everyone else.
A dear friend once said, Kenaz, you are a magician, you have the ability to grant wishes or cast curses. Well my friends I shall use my abilities then... I curse each and every one of you that 2008 brings your dreams into reality, I curse you with love, joy, and happiness. Allow the turning of the new year be that, if something good has happened to you in 2007, allow it to be a smile and memory, something bad, forgive and move on. Do not carry your heartaches into 2008, enter into it with a clean slate.
Know that you are loved, loving, and beloved!
Namaste, Blessed Be, Til next we meet.
