Seems like yesterday; but it was long ago….; Hold on to 16 as long as you can, changes come around real soon makes us women and men. These AM radio proverbs haunt me in the wee hours when I can’t sleep. Not that I can’t sleep, it’s just that I don’t want to sleep. Afraid of what dreams might come. Fears that fill my head on an event that happened a long time ago. In a time when the world and my future were so bright; so full of hope. A time when I had everything in the palm of my hand and I somehow managed to throw it all away. Fucked things up as I normally do. Buried myself into a hole that I can’t escape. I mean I’m in really deep. So deep that the only way to escape, would be to get really pissed drunk and pass out on the railroad tracks. My last memory hear on earth would be of my body being torn to shreds. A nice red and pink mush. Then all this would be over, finally. I could start a new life; with no memory of this one. Ha- that would be to easy, my luck I would end up in Hell and be tourtchered , ass-raped, and made to listen to hip-hop for all eternity.