syn's blog: "Dumb Laws"

• An ordinance in Newcastle specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer! • Cheyenne Citizens may not take showers on Wednesdays. • In Wyoming it is illegal to tattoo a horse with the intent of making it unrecognizable to its owner. • It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking. • It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people's view in a public theater or place of amusement. • Wyoming required that every inmate of the state's training school for girls be issued crinoline bloomers. • You may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June.

• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned. • At one time, margarine was illegal. • A Wisconsin legislator in the 1970s proposed a law providing that no woman over 21 be required to divulge her age. If age information were required by law, women could use an alphabetic code: women in their '20s would use • A Wisconsin legislator recently introduced a bill making it illegal to tattoo someone under the age of 18. He was quoted as saying, "I'm going to save the buttocks of a few juveniles." • Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons. • Car dealerships cannot sell cars on Sunday. • Cheese making requires a cheese maker's license; Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license. • Citizens may not murder their enemies. • Condoms were considered an obscene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist's counter. • In Connorsville, Wisconsin no man shall shoot off a gun while his female partner is having a sexual orgasm. • In St. Croix, women are not allowed to wear anything red in public. • In Wisconsin you are allowed to marry your house. • In Wisconsin you need a cheesemaker's license to make any kind of cheese, except Limburger. To make Limburger, you need a master cheesemaker's license. • In Wisconsin, after 3:00 a.m., you have to send a rocket signal in the air after every mile you drive. • In Wisconsin, it is illegal to cut a woman's hair or to kiss on a train. • It is illegal to cut a woman's hair. • It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window. • It is illegal to kiss on a train. • It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep. • Kenosha: No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public. • La Crosse: It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip). It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window. It is illegal to play checkers in public. You cannot "worry a squirrel." • Milwaukee: An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car. It is against the law to play a flute and drums on the streets to attract attention. If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day. It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns. • Next time you start a riot in Wisconsin remember that it i illegal to use a laser pointer to do so. • Racine: It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep. Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man. • St. Croix: Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public. • State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese. • Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has. • While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license. • Wisconsin law provides for a fine of $2 to $20 for anyone under age 17 caught jumping onto a railroad car while the train is in motion. • You must manually flush all urinals in a building.

• According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag. • Alderson: One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash. • A person may not hold public office if they have ever taken part in a duel. A person may be jailed for up to six months for making fun of someone who does not accept a challenge. • Doctors and dentists may not place a woman under anesthesia unless a third person is present. • Huntington: Firemen may not whistle or flirt at any woman passing a firehouse. It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps. • If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined. • In Alderson, West Virginia, it is illegal to walk a lion, tiger or leopard in the city limits, even it is on a leash. • In Nicholas County, W. Va., no member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humerous stories from the pulpit during a church service. • In West Virginia it is illegal to dig for ginseng on your neighbor's lawn without their permission. • In West Virginia, it is legal for one to take roadkill home for dinner • In West Virginia you cannot fly a red flag in front of your house if you are disappointed in your sherrif. • It is against the law for men to have sex with any animal over 40 pounds in weight. • It is illegal to put an ice cream cone in your pocket on Sundays. • It is illegal to snooze on a train. • It is illegal to spit on any sidewalk which women may walk down. • It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs. • It is unlawful for chickens to lay eggs before 8AM and after 4PM. • Nicholas County: No member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service. • No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions." • Road Kill may be taken home for supper. • When a railroad passes within 1 mile of a community of 100 or more people in it, they must build a station and stop there regularly to pick up and drop off passengers. • Whistling underwater is prohibited.

•"It shall be unlawful for a candidate for office or for nomination thereto whose name appears upon the ballot at any election to give to or purchase for another person, not a member of his or her family, any liquor in or upon any premises licensed by the state for the sale of any such liquor by the drink during the hours that the polls are open on the day of such election." • A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town." • All lollipops are banned. • All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle. • An old Washington law sent duelists to jail for ten years, assuming they didn't lose the duel. • A proposed Washington law protects sports referees from civil suit unless their actions were "willful, wanton, reckless, malicious or grossly negligent." • Auburn: Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail. • A Washington state law offers the presumption that youngsters will read comic books. • Bremerton: You may not shuck peanuts on the street. • Everett: It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window. If the honey you are eating in Seattle is a blend of honey from or more types of flowers, it's illegal for the honey to be labeled as having come from one type of flower. • In Electric City, WA, it is illegal to "keep[ ] or permit[ ] to remain, in any location . . . anything whatsoever in which flies or rats may breed or multiply." • In Olympia, Wash., minors are prohibited from frequenting pool halls. • In Seattle, Washington, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length. • In Spokane, Wash., it used to be illegal to interrupt a religious meeting by having a horse race. • In the state of Washington, there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances. • In the state of Washington it's illegal to catch a fish by throwing a rock at it. • In Washington state it's illegal for a candidate to buy anyone a drink on Election Day. • In Washington state it's illegal to sleep in an outhouse without the owner's permission. • In Washington state it's illegal to sell to minors comics that might incite them to violence or depraved or immoral acts. • In Washington it's illegal to pretend you're the child of a rich person and entitled to his estate. • In Washington, anyone under the age of 18 must have parental permission to throw a tear gas canister. • In Washington state, until quite recently, you could have been fined up to $500 for removing or defacing the label on a pillow. • It is illegal to deflower a virgin even on their wedding day. • It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag. • It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich. • It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse. • Lynden: Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment. • People may not buy a mattress on Sunday. • Seattle: You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length. Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term. No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission. It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus • because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers. • Spokane: TV's may not be bought on Sundays. • The state of Washington doesn't allow marathon dancing--or marathon skipping, sliding, gliding, rolling or crawling. • There is/was a law on the books in Washington state that stated that a motorcar driven at night must be preceded by something like 100 yards by a man carrying a lantern. • Under the law of the state of Washington, any restroom with pay toilets has to have an equal number of free toilets. This law came to pass after the speaker of the state House of Representatives raced to an all-pay facility without a dime. • Waldron Island: No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing. • Washington state doesn't allow fake wrestling. • When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed. • Wilbur: You may not ride an ugly horse. • You are not allowed to breast feed in public. • You need a license to sell condoms in Washington state.

• An old Virginia law was titled, "An Act to Prevent Corrupt Practices or Bribery by Any Person Other Than a Candidate." • As in many towns, you need a permit to run a barbershop in Christiansburg, Va. But the wording of the town's law indicates that the permit will be revoked if you're caught operating without a permit. • A Virginia law requires all bathtubs to be kept out in the yards, not inside the houses. • Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween. • Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars. • Culpeper: No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk. • Dayton: A person of color may not be outside or within the city limits after 7 pm. • Driving while not wearing shoes is prohibited. • If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations. • If you are intoxicated but not driving your car, but the person who is driving your car is intoxicated, both you and the driver can be charged with DUI in Virginia Beach, Virginia. • In Christiansburg, Va., it's illegal to imitate a police whistle. • In Christiansburg, Va., it's illegal to "spit, expectorate or deposit any sputum, saliva or any form of saliva or sputum." • In Newport it's against the law to tickle a girl under her chin with a feather duster in order to get her attention. • In Norfolk a woman can't go out without wearing a corset. • In Radford, VA you are not allowed to spit, loogie, puke or urinate on the streets. • In Richmond, Va., you must buy a license for 93 cents to sell song books on the street. • In Richmond, Virginia it is illegal to flip a coin in any eating establishment to determine who buys a cup of coffee. • It is illegal to sell peanut brittle on Sundays. • It is illegal to spit on sidewalk. • It is illegal to tickle women. • Lebanon: It is illegal to kick your wife out of bed. • Norfolk: Spitting on a sea gull is not tolerated. A man may face 60 days in jail for patting a woman's derriere. Women must wear a corset after sundown and be in the company of male chaperone. • Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary. • Perhaps anticipating telemarketing, the town fathers of Albany, Va., have for years prohibited peddlers from using the telephone to either sell things or raise funds. • Police radar detectors are illegal. • Richmond: It is illegal to flip a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for a coffee. • Stafford County: It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm. • Swearing at someone over the phone in virginia is punishable by a $100 fine. • There is a state law prohibiting "corrupt practices of bribery by any person other than candidates." • There was once a law in Salem Virginia that made it illegal to leave home without knowing where you were going. • Victoria: It is illegal to skate down the sidewalk of Main Street. • Virginia Beach: If you are drunk and not driving your car, and the person who is driving the car is drunk as well, you may both receive DUI's. It is illegal for a person to ride on the handlebars of a bike. It is illegal to use profanity on Atlantic Avenue or the boardwalk. It is also unlawful to drive by the same place within 30 minutes on Atlantic Avenue. • Waynesboro: It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag. • You cannot buy hardware of any kind on Sunday. • You cannot sell lettuce on Sunday, but you can sell beer, wine etc. • You may not have oral or anal sex. • You may not work on Sunday.

• As in most dairy states, Vermont does what it can to discourage the use of margarine. For example, it's illegal to use colored margarine in restaurants unless the menu indicates you do--in letters two inches high. Colored margarine can only be served in triangle shaped patties. • At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole. • Barre All residents shall bathe every Saturday night. • Call a Vermont court a "kangaroo court" or some similar moniker, and you might be looking at a $200 fine. It is illegal to defame a court. • In Vermont It's against the law (not to mention impossible) to whistle under water. • In Vermont it is illegal to paint landscapes in times of war. • In Vermont, women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth. • It is illegal to deny the existence of God • It's against the law in Vermont for vagrants to procure food by force. Apparently if you have a good job and stable home life, it's O.K. to procure food by force. • Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week- - on Saturday night. • Whistling underwater is illegal • Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.

• A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. • A Tremonton, Utah law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. • A Utah legislator proposed a resolution urging that each TV weather person be required to provide an ice cream cone to every member of the state House of Representatives whenever the forecast was wrong. The resolution failed, perhaps on First Amendment grounds. • In addition to normal charges, the woman's name will be published in the local newspaper.The man does not receive any punishment. • Birds have the right of way on all highways. • In Monroe, daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor. • In Utah it is illegal to fish from horseback. • In Utah, the husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. • In Utah when a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin. • It is against the law to fish from horseback. • It is considered an offense to hunt whales. • It is illegal not to drink milk. • It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them. • It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list. • Kaysville: You must have identification to enter a convenience store after dark. • Logan: Women may not swear. • Monroe: Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor. • No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call. • No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance within the boundaries of Tremonton, Utah. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed. • Provo: Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine. • Salt Lake City: No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin. • The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms (BAFT) bans the word "refreshing" to describe any alcohol beverage. • Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine. • Tremonton: It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught, the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper. • Trout Creek: Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches. • When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin. • You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.

• A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit. • A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. • Abilene: It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing. • Austin: Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket. • Beaumont: Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University. • Borger: It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind. • Clarendon: It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster. • Dallas: It's illegal to possess realistic dildos. • El Paso: Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them." • Galveston: It is illegal to drive a motor car down Broadway before noon on Sundays. • Houston: Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday. It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday. • If two trains going in opposite directions on the same track meet each other, one can't move until the other does. • If you went to church in Texas years back, you'd better be recognized. An old law made it illegal to go to church in disguise. • In Alamo a person found intoxicated must be given a large dose of castor oil by a local doctor...and failure to gulp it down will result in a fine. • In Corpus Christie it is illegal to raise alligators in your home. • In Dallas County it is illegal to own any realistic looking, phallic shaped, personal massager more than one foot in length. • In Houston you cannot buy beer after midnight on Sunday, but you can buy it on Monday. • In Kingsville, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property. • In Lefors, Texas it is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer at any time while standing. • In Mesquite, Texas it is illegal for kids to have unusual haircuts. • In Texas criminals are required to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. • In Texas it's legal for a chicken to have sex with you, but it's illegal to reciprocate. • It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. • It is illegal to carry a pair of wire-cutters in your back pocket. • It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need a windshield, but you must have the wipers. • It is illegal for a person to shoot a buffalo from the second story of their hotel. • It is illegal to have an open container in a car. • It is illegal to have anything protruding from your bumper unless it is attached with a chain • It is illegal to milk another person's cow. • It is illegal to spit on the sidewalk. • It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. • It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo. • It is legal for a husband to beat his wife as long as he uses something no bigger than his thumb. • It is legal for the blind to go hunting as long as they have someone with them who isn't blind. • It is legal to commit a homicide as long as you tell the person when, and how you are going to kill them. • It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. • In San Antonio, Texas, you can't honk a horn, run a generator, have a revival meeting or do anything else that disturbs the neighborhood and the city has a four-member noise police squad to enforce the law. • In Texas any artificial constructed underwater barrier reefs must come with an instruction booklet. • In Texas, sixteen-year old divorced girls are prohibited from talking about sex during high school extracurricular activities. • It is unlawful for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed doing so by a peace officer. • Jasper: Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times. Fine of 100 dollars. • LeFors: It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing. • Lubbock County: It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else's blood stream. • Mesquite: It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts. • Port Arthur: Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator. • Richardson: It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it visible from the street. It is illegal to do "U Turns". • San Antonio: It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands. • Temple: No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square. You can ride your horse in the saloon. Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot. • Texarkana: Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights. • Texas law forbids anyone to have a pair of pliers in his possession. • Texas state law prohibits taking more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. • The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home. • There is an old law in Texas that states you are unable to tuck your pants into one boot unless you own ten or more cattle. • When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. • You can be legally married by publicly introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times.

•"Crimes against nature" are prohibited. • Any person crippling, killing or in any way destroying a proud bitch that is running at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such killing or destruction. • Driving is not to be done while asleep. • Dyersburg: It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date. • Fayette County: You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property. • Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law. • Hollow logs may not be sold. • In Jonesboro, Tenn., a slingshot used to be classified by law as a deadly weapon. • In Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it, waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. • In Tennessee hollow logs may not be sold. • In Tennessee it is illegal to use a lasso to catch fish. • It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date. • It is illegal to catch a fish with a lasso. • It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish. • It is legal to gather and consume road kill • It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM. • Knoxville: In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a "hitching post." • Lenoir City: When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming. • Lexington: No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk. Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited. • Memphis: Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM. Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets of downtown Memphis. It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises. • More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel. • Nashville: Males may not be sexually aroused in public. • Stealing a horse is punishable by hanging. • The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin. • You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile. Oneida: An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song "It Ain't Goin' To Rain No Mo'."

• If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them. • In hotels in Sioux Falls, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds! • In South Dakota no horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. • In South Dakota it is illegal to try to convince a pacifist to renounce his beliefs by threatening to arm-wrestle him. • It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory. • Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden. • No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. • Spearfish: If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.