As I said in my last entry change is a good thing.....but it is also a very difficult one. Sometimes I feel that not everyone understands that. Most people feel like I should be able to just snap my fingers and move on with my life. IT IS NOT THAT SIMPLE. So I am going to lay it out in the open one last time for everyone to undertand, you will either get it or you wont, nothing more to say.
I am 23 years old and I was in a very long and drawn out relationship for seven years. (That means I was 16 when we got together) I had never been on my own. I had never had to try to support myself, let alone try to support myself and a child. I had never known what it is like to live alone and sleep in an empty bed. But I do now. And it is hard. And yes I am scared, and yes I am sad, and confused, and sometimes angry. Because i do not know what I am doing from day to day. I am living in the momemt trying to make it for my son. And it is going to take me awhile to adjust. Like a good friend of mine said "It may take me weeks or even months, or I may wake up tomarrow and wonder what the hell I'm trippin over!" And no that doesn't mean I'm going to take him back or that I am even thinking about him. That just means I am frustrated in the moment because I don't know what I am doing. But I will make it eventually. I'm just dealing with the change........