SH's blog: "Dating Guidelines ???"

I recently had a chance to do some thinking about the whole "dating" process, and I've come up with some perplexing questions on this matter.... What is the "correct" way to initiate dating? Obviously there is no one "perfect" way to begin, but there should at least be some general rules or a few guidelines to help with the process. In the old days, a young man would ask permission to "court" a girl, and he would state his intentions right up front. But today's women are much more liberated, and it's acceptable for them to be in relationships for reasons other than just marriage.... So it's obvious that in today's society.... yesterday's rules, no longer apply. Which brings us to the question, "Now what do we do"?.... Each woman has their own idea of how they want to be romanced.... For some it's wine and roses,.. For others it's the "confident caveman" approach where the guy takes charge and sweeps them off their feet..... Some women like to be treated as friends first, to let them get used to trusting and confiding in the guy before moving on to a physical relationship. The point is,... How do you know? ... How can you tell what someone is looking for from just the first meeting?... We all have the ability to exhibit different personality traits depending on the circumstances we find ourselves in... For example, if you go to a sporting event or a rock concert you might scream loudly and cheer,... But when attending a funeral, you will find that people are much more reserved and usually act respectfully. I'm sure we all agree that people's actions are often affected by whatever situation they are in at the time. Now let's apply this concept to dating..... I don't feel I should have to "adjust" my personality, just to make myself more compatible with someone I'm interested in dating.... still it IS very important to make a good first impression..... So once again, "What do you do"? ... It's always so difficult to figure out the best way to express to someone new, that you are attracted to them and would like to begin dating ..... If you are too bold, you risk scaring off someone that prefers to take things slow.... If you suggest "casual" dating you sound like you're not serious about them, or worse yet she could think you're just a "player" ... If you're too shy, and don't speak out confidently enough you run the risk of having her file you away in the "just friends" category. ..... There is a hundred different ways you can make the wrong move, and the only way I can see of having any real chance at all is to "test the water" to find out what each particular woman is looking for, and then you need to make sure you show them that side of your personality. The problem is.. I don't feel like playing that game, .. I don't want to have to pretend to be someone I'm not, just to get my foot in the door....To me that just doesn't seem honest... It should be enough to just show someone your true self, and then allow that person to accept or reject you based on who you really are. Unfortunately, it seems like a lot of women today have been hurt by somebody who wasn't who they "pretended" to be. And now unless you have the "perfect approach", they never even give you the chance to show them your true personality.... Here's an idea....Why don't you ladies make the first move and chase us guys for a while? Then maybe I wouldn't have to worry about things like this, and I could spend a lot more time.......Just being me. Tags: Dating Love Relationships