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As a parent, you want to take all of your child's fears and pain away and give them answers to questions that are about to push them off of that emotional ledge.
I can't take my son's fears and pain away, and I don't have any answers to his questions that are pushing us BOTH off that emotional ledge that life has put us...
Three weeks ago, my son came over with his wife and my two grand babies. He had informed me that he's been suffering from groin pain for awhile, and had found a lump in his testicle. He made an appointment with his MD who peformed a panel of tests and an ultrasound. While waiting for the results we were just being us, joking and knowing that it wasn't anything bad because after all, we are invincible.
A day or two passed when he got the call that he had Testicular Cancer, and he would have to have it removed ASAP. He would also have to undergo a CT scan to make sure it hadn't spread. With Testicular cancer it begins in the testicle, then spreads to your lymph nodes. It will then attack your lungs, liver and brain. This cancer has a different cell growth and is highly curable, however once it invades after leaving the nodes it's a lot harder to silence it.
The day of Kevin's surgery the results came in that it has spread to his Lymph nodes and he is now referred to as Clinical Stage 2. Even with the positive thoughts that it's curable so far up to this point the anger begins to envelop you, because you are looking at your son who's only 24, a newly wed with a 2 year old and a 4.5 month old beautiful baby girls and there is nothing you can do to take his anguish away.
Today we meet with his Oncologist. Today we will make a decision to either do treatments of Chemo which the cancer could resist. Or have a RPLND performed which is a major surgery anywhere between 3 - 20 hours that involves a 14 inch scar from his sternum to down below the belly button. They take out all his organs and have to identify all his nerves before removing the lymph nodes. It's a long recovery and then he would still have to undergo Chemo treatments.
I want him to have the surgery so we can get that cancer our of his body. His wife wants to put faith into just the chemo treatments and hope that it kills it.
My son waivers back and forth.
Today is going to be an emotional day and I'm scared not just for me, but I'm scared and worried about the decision that my son has to make and the long road that is ahead of him.
We as parents should be the one that goes through this, not our kids. We have lived half of our lives. Our children are just starting to experience life.
Since 2008 we have lost 2 grandparents, and uncle and my mom to cancer. My son was there. He has lost faith in God and now is when he needs him more than ever.
..........I pray to god that my son makes the right decision today and I pray that we beat the hell out of this ugly cancer because I've had just about enough of it traumatizing my family.
♥
