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What are you waiting for?
You can't break me
I can only allow myself to be broken
And I choose another path
I choose to rise above.
You mess with this bull
And you'll get my horns
Did you underestimate me?
Thats why you'll never win.
You may have had my heart
But you'll never have my soul.
You'll never crush me
You'll never hurt me again.
I'm stronger than you know
More stubborn than you'll ever be
Innocently, evil - uncommonly good
I could annihilate you.
But you're not worth my time.
Shattered and torn
Tossed in a hole
Buried somewhere
In the darkness of your soul
Suffocating
Is there no way out?
Broken like so many hearts
Giving in to the shroud of doubt.
Eternally wounded
My heart, that was his
Suffer like you deserve to do
You don't know what pain is.
Spent the weekend in your arms
Making love under the stars
But its not enough
I'll never really know
Get my hopes up with a kiss
With a smile no one could miss
But its not enough
Watch it fade away
Looking deep into your eyes
Triggers something in my mind
But its not enough
Crumbles at the touch...
Fleeting moments
Of love
passion,
heartache
Pain
Flash before me
Blinding me
With memories
Wasted away
So desperate
For closure
Clarity
Quiet
Peace
Its unbearable
This wound
Bleeding out
My sorrows
I'm finished
With suffering
struggling
Hoping
Living
I'm moving on
Breathing in
One last time
The End.
(For Troy, a friend who I lost to suicide today. I have known this kind of desperation, and I am sorry he had to give in to it. RIP Troy, you will be missed)
The moon throws shadows
In my room
Sitting in the dark
It shall all be over soon.
A beautiful mistake
Yet I hold no regret
Your smile fades in the distance
But I will never forget.
My bleeding heart holds the pain
Of a thousand fatal wounds
Bless my weary soul
It shall all be over soon.
8-1-09
(this one may not be done yet....havent decided)
In a bizarre parasitic death sentence, a fungus turns carpenter ants into the walking dead and gets them to die in a spot that's perfect for the fungus to grow and reproduce.
Scientists have no clue how the fungus takes control of the brains of ants so effectively. But a new study in the September issue of the American Naturalist reveals an incredible set of strategies that ensue.
The carpenter ants nest high in the canopy of a forest in Thailand, and they trek to the forest floor to forage. The fungus, Ophiocordyceps unilateralis, prefers to end up on the undersides leaves sprouting from the northwest side of plants that grow on the forest floor, the new study showed. That's where temperature, humidity and sunlight are ideal for the fungus to grow and reproduce and infect more ants.
Once infected by the fungus, an ant is compelled to climb down from the canopy to the low leaves, where it clamps down with its mandibles just before it dies.
"The fungus accurately manipulates the infected ants into dying where the parasite prefers to be, by making the ants travel a long way during the last hours of their lives," said study leader David P. Hughes of Harvard University.
After the ant dies, the fungus continues to grow inside it. By dissecting victims, Hughes and colleagues found that the parasite converts the ant's innards into sugars that help the fungus grow. But it leaves the muscles controlling the mandibles intact to make sure the ant keeps its death grip on the leaf.
The fungus also preserves the ant's outer shell, growing into cracks and crevices to reinforce weak spots, thereby fashioning a protective coating that keeps microbes and other fungi out.
"The fungus has evolved a suite of novel strategies to retain possession of its precious resource," Hughes said.
After a week or two, spores from the fungus fall to the forest floor, where other ants can be infected.
Making nests in the forest canopy might be an evolved ant strategy to avoid infection, Hughes figures. The ants also seem to avoid foraging under infected areas. This too might be an adaptive strategy to avoid infection, but more study is needed to confirm it, he said.
How the fungus controls ant behavior remains unknown. "That is another research area we are actively pursuing right now," Hughes said.
Taken from http://www.livescience.com/animals/090812-ant-fungus.html
Emptiness consumes me
Loneliness takes hold
I can't fight this feeling
My body grows so cold
Agony engulfs me
In never ending streams
All that's left within me
Are swiftly shattered dreams
Sadness overwhelms me
Eyes, pour out my soul
All the broken promises
Make me lose control
Where were you when I needed you?
You left me here for dead
Paint yourself a pretty picture
Of what you need instead.
You don't care that I'm hurting
Cuz you ain't got the time
Don't mind me, if I'm cryin'
I'll
Be
Just
Fine.
You ooze confidence
Seeping through that sleazy smile
But I know just what you are
Can't fool me anymore.
You are slime
Slick with deception
Dripping with false kindness
Spouting lies from every orifice
Won't fool me anymore.
You sweat honey
So the flies gather
To feast on your every word
But when the swarm dissipates
It turns to bitter filth
I won't let it fool me anymore.
Bathed in liquor
Nothing's quicker
Fuckin' right!
It's on tonight!
Tie me up
Hold me down
Use me
Abuse me
Spin me around.
Lookin' for love?
You're outta luck
Right now all I want
Is a good hard fuck.
Get in bed
No talk, just head.
All my trust
Replaced by lust.
Build me up
Knock me down
Seize me
Please me
Then leave town.
