pIeRcEdMySoUltOdAy's blog: "Crazy Thoughts"

If you dress nicely, he says you're a snob. If you dress sexy, he says you're a slut. If you argue with him, he says you're stubborn. If you're quiet, he says you're stupid. If you call him, he says you're needy and clingy. If he calls you, he says you should be grateful. If you don't love him, he'll try to win you. If you love him, he'll leave you. If you don't fuck him, he'll say you don't love him. If you do, he'll say you're easy. If you tell him your problems, he'll say you're irritating. If you don't , he'll say you don't trust him. If you lecture him, he'll say you're bitchy. If he lectures you, it's because he "cares". If you break a promise, you can't be trusted. If he breaks it, he had to. If you cheat, he'll expect it to be over. If he cheats, he expects to be given another chance either way

I havent been to church since I don’t remember when
Things were goin’ great ‘til they fell apart again
So I listened to the preacher as he told me what to do
He said you can’t go hatin’ others who have done wrong to you
Sometimes we get angry, but we must not condemn
Let the good Lord do His job and you just pray for them

I pray your brakes go out runnin’ down a hill
I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I’d like to
I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls
I pray you’re flyin’ high when your engine stalls
I pray all your dreams never come true
Just know whereever you are honey, I pray for you

I’m really glad I found my way to church
‘Cause I’m already feelin’ better and I thank God for the words
Yeah I’m goin’ take the high road
And do what the preacher told me to do
You keep messin’ up and I’ll keep prayin’ for you

I pray your tire blows out at 110
I pray you pass out drunk with your best friend and wake up with his and her tattoos

I pray your brakes go out runnin’ down a hill
I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I’d like to
I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls
I pray you’re flyin’ high when your engine stalls
I pray all your dreams never come true
Just know whereever you are, near or far, in your house or in your car,
wherever you are honey, I pray for you.
I pray for you

I don't want to feel
Insignificant anymore,
I don't want to go back To
How we were before.

I don't want you to make me feel
Like I am a low excuse for a human being,
Sometimes you make me feel as though
I am not even worth this air I'm breathing.

I don't know how you do it -
Degrade me so much that it hurts,
You can hit me all you like,
But nothing hurts more than your words.

The bruises will fade away with time,
But every minute you yell at me will stay,
I won't forget that I am not worthy of anybody,
Or how you think I should just leave this world, Go away.

I don't need how you tell me
That I am pathetically useless,
Am I really no good in this world?
Is fighting for my life helpless?

I just don't want to be mocked,
Or made to feel minuscule,
But if you consider the source,
It's kind of pitiful;

What Have you done in your life
That gives you the right to break me like this?
I would never tell you, But if you were do die,
You'd be the last thing anyone would miss.

Someone asked me the other day if my glass was half empty or half full.  I was going to say it's empty, but that's not completely true.  My life isn't void and I have my happy moments; but they usually just seem to disappear, or get worse.  So, my glass is cracked.  Yes, cracked.  It gets filled up with happiness and hope, but it always ends up escaping my grasp.  It always ends up empting out.  It will never be full because it's always leaking.  And one day, it will get thrown away, because no one wants a broken glass.