http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnwUgSb95Os here ya go for larry the cable guys rendition of night before christmas watch it its funny
Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the trailer,
We're dreaming of shotguns
And cheap polyester.
My Ford truck was parked
on Its blocks in the yard,
In hopes that St. Nicholas
Would bring me some tars.
I in my pajamas and my deer huntin' cap
Had just keeled over for a good drunken nap.
When up on my tin roof there arose such a racket,
I opened the dog box so the hounds could go track it.
And then on the roof I discovered the cause,
Perched up on my chimney was ol' Santy Clause!
And then from my eyes there fell tear by tear,
As I saw those eight tasty lookin' reindeer.
"Shoot" I said, "I'd feel bad if I shot 'em"
Although eight big reindeer would last me past autumn.
Those horns would look great hangin' up on my wall,
But if I shot them, Santa'd have no transport at all.
So I yelled to the Big Guy, "Santa, it's me!
You forgot my bicycle back when I was three!
Santa, remember that time I was five?
I asked for the Bee Gees' Stayin' Alive!
What did you bring me this year. old man?
Some tires for my truck or parts for my van
? I asked for a rifle and two cans of Skoal,
But I'll bet what I got ain't what you was told!
So what's in the sack, Santa, if I may inquire?
Two cans of Spam! You dirty ol' liar!
Well, that's OK Santa, you just made my day,
Cause I'm eatin' reindeer from now until May!"
Thirty days later, my freezer's still full,
And Santa's ol' sleigh is for cattle to pull.
Then I heard St. Nick beller as he rode out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, I hope cattle can fly!"
Santa packed up his goodies and piled tall in his sleigh,
And to fatten his cattle, I sold him some hay.
Such a wonderful Christmas, friends, yes it is true,
But what is ol' Sany Clause bringin' for you?
