Deno's blog: "By The Numbers"

1. You can’t make choices for other people.  Don’t let other people make choices for you.
2. There are an unlimited number of ‘Dr. No’ folks that you will encounter in this life.  If you have a personal inspiration, idea or goal, don’t let a ‘Dr. No’ deter you!  Trust your gut, do the planning and then DO IT!
3. Opportunities are often disguised as work, so most people don’t recognize them.
4. The Chinese character for the word ‘crisis’ literally means ‘danger and opportunity.’
5. Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small pieces. -Henry Ford -  Same concept configured as a question:  How do you eat an elephant?  Answer: One bite at a time.
6. Learn from the past, but don’t dwell in the past.  In other words, don’t abuse the precious ‘now’ by not being in it.
7. Worry is a misuse of the imagination.
8. Perfect is the enemy of good.
9. Education and knowledge are invaluable.  But do we need to know everything?  Is it possible in a specialized world to know everything?  For instance, do you need to have a comprehensive understanding of dentistry to go to a dentist to have a cavity filled?  In many instances, ‘not knowing’ is a wise approach – it’s like cleaning out a crowded closet to make space for something useful.
10. Big results come when you narrow your focus.  Concentrate your efforts on smaller and smaller areas.  When your efforts are diffused over a wide area they won’t have much of an impact.  So focus on smaller areas and your efforts will be felt more fully.  It could take time for change to happen, but keep that focus narrow.
11. You can’t do it all yourself.  We live in a multi-specialized world.  For example, in building a house, plumbers specialize, electricians specialize, heating and air conditioning technicians specialize, roofers specialize, masons specialize – get it? These guys are consultant contractors who have mastered that component.  For any large project, find the right consultant or mentor.
12. Don’t try to impress everyone.  Purposely impressing people is an act that brings nothing but a momentary ego boost.  Be real with people instead.  Connect with fewer people on a level that is deeper and more profound.
13. Short lecture on happiness and contentment:  Check out what you do have and be satisfied with it for today.  There is an infinite list of what you could want and don’t have.  I like Shakespeare’s line in the play Hamlet, when the young prince tells us that “I could be bounded in a nutshell and count myself king of infinite space.”  The trick is what one emphasizes.  We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy.  The amount of work is the same.  -Carlos Castaneda 
14. Manage your time.  Your situation and environment is ever changing, so be careful not to confuse things that are urgent with things that are important.
15. A healthy paradox of life that I find personally challenging:  There is ENLIGHTENMENT to be gained from the ability to live in the moment, but if you don’t have a time management system, or an event control system, you are at a significant disadvantage in achieving goals.
16. Keep it simple.  There is a world of magnificence hidden in simplicity.  Pick the five most important things in your life now and focus on those things.  Let the other stuff go.  Stop the busyness and really enjoy what’s important to you.
17. Focus on goals, not obstacles.
18. There is a major gap between knowledge and taking ACTION.  Mistakes and failures are necessary interim steps in the learning process.  Stop talking about what you have done or what you are going to do. Just do it and let your actions speak for themselves.
19. Sometimes you just have to go for it.  Put your uncertainty and fears aside for a second and ask yourself this:  “If I try and I don’t get it right the first time, what will I have lost and what will I have gained?”  The answer is:  You will have lost nothing but a little bit of your time while gaining an important lesson that will help you get it right the second or third time.  People rarely get it right the first time.  In fact, usually the only people who ever get it right are those who continue going for it even when they’ve come up short numerous times before.
20. Fall down seven times, stand up eight. -Japanese proverb
21. Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. –Confucius  
22. In order to get, you have to give.  Supporting, guiding and making contributions to other people is one of life’s greatest rewards.  Everything you do comes back around.
23. Not much is worth fighting about.  If you can avoid it, don’t fight.  Step back from arguments with your spouse, family members or neighbors.  When you feel anger surging up and you want to yell that vulgar remark on tip of your tongue, just close your mouth and walk away.  Let yourself calm down.  You don’t have to be right or win an argument.  It just doesn’t matter.
24. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is always the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!
25. If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.
26. People skills – I think the main one:  ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS AND LISTENING.  Practice as if you were a television interviewer.  Get other people to tell their stories.  A powerful communication skill that I call SCAFFOLDING in business or informal interaction with other human beings on the phone or in person:  Give the person your first name and get their first name in the first few moments of contact… which establishes rapport.  Example:   “Hi, my name is Marc; I didn’t get your name, who am I speaking with?” (Follow-up, depending on the situation, with “How are you doing today?”)  Then after this rapport context, move on to dialogue like, “I wonder if you could help me with a simple issue I am having with ABC… or you do you have any recommendations for XYZ?   Always in closing, let the person know that you “appreciate their assistance.”
27. You don’t need an MBA, but take some courses or read some books on finance, economics, financial planning, investments (real estate, stock market), and accounting.  With these navigational skills, start to steer your ship through continually changing seas.  Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.  Don’t spend more than you make.  Don’t let your money manage you.
28. It is your life, your body and mind.  Without necessarily getting a Ph.D. in nutrition, increase minimal culinary skills, accumulate some basic nutritional knowledge, and start experimenting immediately with what works for you.  Also concentrate on keeping your body active.  Cardiovascular improvement – your heart loves you when you take it there, deep breathing space, building muscle, stretching space.  Escape from confinement in automobiles and office desks and move around.
29. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.
30. Smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday… and you will be.

1. You never know how strong you really are until being strong is the only choice you have.
2. Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
3. You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
4. Nobody is perfect, and nobody deserves to be perfect.  Nobody has it easy.  You never know what people are going through.  Every one of us has issues.  So don’t belittle yourself or anyone else.  Everybody is fighting their own unique war.
5. Crying doesn’t indicate that you’re weak.  Since birth, it has always been a sign that you’re alive and full of potential.
6. No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying. 
7. Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
8. Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness.  Let it go.
9. Making one person smile can change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  Start small.  Start now.
10. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
11. Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.
12. You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.
13. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.
14. You can learn great things from your mistakes when you aren’t busy denying them.
15. Give up worrying about what others think of you.  What they think isn’t important.  What is important is how you feel about yourself.
16. When you stop chasing the wrong things you give the right things a chance to catch you.
17. When other people treat you poorly, keep being you.  Don’t ever let someone else’s bitterness change the person you are.
18. You have to accept that some things will never be yours, and learn to appreciate the things that are only yours.
19. Sometimes it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one in the world who’s struggling, who’s frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by.  But that feeling is a lie.  And if you just hold on, someone will find you and help make it better.  Because we all need a little help sometimes – someone to help us hear the music in our world.  To remind us that it won’t always be this way.  That someone is out there right now.
20. Don’t be afraid to move out of your comfort zone.  Some of your best life experiences and opportunities will transpire only after you dare to lose.
21. Sometimes we accidentally allow small problems to escalate and dominate our lives.  If we get overcharged a few cents, it is irritating, but don’t let it ruin your day.  There will always be small issues that irritate us; the secret is to be able to give them the miniscule level of importance they deserve.
22. Giving up doesn’t always mean you’re weak, sometimes it means you are strong enough and smart enough to let go.
23. Ask yourself whether each of your relationships drags you down or lifts you up.  Surrounding yourself with positive, loving people is half the battle of living a happy, successful life.
24. Spend more time with those who make you smile and less time with those who you feel pressured to impress.
25. There are few joys in life that equal a good conversation, a good read, a good walk, a good hug, a good smile, or a good friend.
26. Don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future for too long.  Right now is life.  Live it.
27. No matter how cautiously you choose your words, someone will always twist them around and misinterpret what you say.  So just say what you need to say.
28. In order to be creative, we must lose our fear of being wrong.
29. Not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of good luck.
30. To be great does not mean you have to dominate others.  It means you have to dominate your own potential.
31. If you are passionate about something, pursue it, no matter what anyone else thinks.  That’s how dreams are achieved.
32. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.
33. Forgiveness is one of the primary keys to happiness.
34. The best revenge is happiness, because nothing drives your adversaries more insane than seeing you smile.
35. Stay positive when negativity surrounds you.  Smile when others frown.  It’s an easy way to make a difference.
36. If a person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so. Don’t bother reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.
37. Don’t regret intimate relationships that don’t work out.  Because they will only help you find the right partner for you, and better appreciate them for everything they do and everything they are.
38. What lies before us and behind us are tiny matters when compared to what lies within us.
39. The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists.  It rewards people who get things done.  And the only way to get things done is to be imperfect 99% of the time.
40. Never lie – not even a white lie!  When you steer away from the truth, you steer away from your soul.  Be honest, be real and tell the truth.  This awareness forces you to make better choices and be a stronger person.
41. Feelings, good and bad, always come and go.
42. Don’t get caught up in wasted potential from years past.  Potential is all we ever have.
43. We are not alone.  No matter how bizarre or embarrassed or pathetic we feel about our own situation, there will be others out there experiencing the same emotions.  When you hear yourself say “I am all alone,” it is your mind trying to sell you a lie so you will continue to feel sorry for yourself.
44. It is okay to be angry.  It is never okay to be cruel.
45. Don’t pray when it rains if you don’t pray when the sun shines.
46. Mistakes teach you important lessons.  Every time you make one, you’re one step closer to your goal.  The only mistake that can truly hurt you is choosing to do nothing simply because you’re too scared to make a mistake.
47. Money is a renewable resource.  If you lose some money, don’t sweat it.  You can always make more.  However, if you spend valuable time stressing over money, or lost opportunity, you’ll never get that time back.  Time is more valuable than money – time is the greatest constituent of life.
48. Never let people know that they got to you.  Ignore them.  Hold your head up high and pretend all their negative remarks don’t even phase you, and someday they actually won’t.
49. There is nothing to hold you back except you.  And there is only one question to ask yourself: “What would you do if you were not afraid?”  Think about it.
50. Life is way more enjoyable when you stop trying to be cool and simply focus on being yourself.
51. It’s often hard to tell just how close you are to success.
52. When you spend time worrying, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.
53. No matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should be.  Either you succeed or you learn something. Win-Win.
54. You must see things how they are instead of how you hoped, wished, or expected them to be.
55. Even when you feel like you have nothing, someone else likely has far less.  Find them and help them.  You’ll see why.
56. Laughter is the best medicine for stress.  Laugh at yourself often.  Find the humor in whatever situation you’re in.
57. If you want to feel rich, just count all the great things you have that money can't buy.
58. Forgiving yourself is far more important than getting others to forgive you.
59. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
60. You can press forward long after you can’t.  It’s just a matter of wanting it bad enough.
61. It’s not about getting a chance, it’s about taking a chance.  You’ll rarely be 100% sure it will work.  But you can always be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work.  Sometimes you just have to go for it!
62. If it were easy everyone would do it.  This is why get rich quick schemes will never be true.  If it was so quick and easy then everyone would be millionaires.  Accomplishing great things is hard work, but well worth it.
63. Notice and cherish life’s surprises.  Just because it’s not what you were expecting, doesn’t mean it’s not everything you’ve been waiting for.
64. Be vulnerable.  Allow yourself to feel, to be open and authentic.  Tear down any emotional brick walls you have built around you and feel every exquisite emotion, both good and bad.  This is real life.  This is how you welcome new opportunities.
65. You must create and look for opportunities.  Opportunities rarely ever come knocking on the door of someone who’s not seeking them.  You have to create and seek opportunities for yourself.  You have to take the initiative to get the ball rolling and the doors opening.
66. If it’s out of your control, why fret about it?  Concentrating on things you can control is how you make good things happen.
67. Saying “no” to right people gives you the time and resources required to say “yes” to right opportunities. 
68. No matter how much progress you make there will always be the people who insist that whatever you’re trying to do is impossible. Or they may incessantly suggest that the idea or dream as a whole is utterly ridiculous because nobody really cares. When you come across these people, don’t try to reason with them. Instead, forget that they exist. They will only waste your time and energy.
69. If you spend 80% of your time focusing on the problem and only 20% on the solution, what do you think is going to happen?
70. No matter how badly you think your life may be going, or how messed up you think you are, there is at least one thing you are doing right in your life or you wouldn’t be alive reading this.
71. A problem is a chance for you to learn.
72. The greatest struggle is to be something different from what the average man is.
73. In times of great stress, it’s always wise to keep busy, to plow your anger and frustration into something positive.
74. One thing is for sure: Regardless of the situation, life goes on.
75. Everyone wants a perfect ending.  But over the years I’ve learned that some of the best poems don’t rhyme, and many great stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, or end.  Life is about not knowing, embracing change, and taking a moment and making the best of it without knowing what’s going to happen next.

Oh, and…

You wanna know who’s awesome?  Read the first word of this line again.