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When my daughter was 16 she participated in many benefits that involved children in foster care, children from abusive situations etc.... Without going into details when she passed one thing I knew I had to do was carry on her passion. Every year I try to involve myself in atleast one Holiday function. Yesterday the community had a small party for kids in foster care.
Every year I am faced with the puzzling questions like " Are you going to adopt us"? or " Why won't anyone adopt me, what's wrong with me?" This breaks my heart becuase i don't have the answer, nor can i give any false hopes to them. Last night this one child was very withdrawn from the rest of the kids. After a hour or so this child opened up. After being in 7 foster homes and the long journey that she has tackled, I seen the hope in her eyes disolve as our conversation became more in depth. To make a long story short and the qustions that arose were...
How can she be placed in homes where abuse takes place over and over but nobody loves her enough to adopt her? Why can't she be in a home where she is loved and be treated like the rest of the kids? How do you really answer this? I wanted to so badly say " Our system is a fucked up one period!" Just about anyone can be a foster parent, woman can have as many children as they want regardless of financial means. As long as you have a roof over your head, kids have clothes on and food in the house prooving neglect or a parent to be unfit takes years and alot of money.
Adults that can't have children and want to adopt and love a child can't unless your financial means are met. You have to meet what the State says you need to make in a year to financially support this child. Then mental stability.. God forbid you ever seeked a psychiatrist becuase of depression due to life's challenges, or maybe even a loss of a child. Why are these people being damned? But for example someone addicted to drugs can pop out child after child and allowed to collect every means of financial support?
This wasn't made for political arguments. In a 8 year old little girls eyes. Things probably will never change, this I'm sure will never be resolved. But if this helps maybe one person be a big brother or a big sister or maybe even a awesome foster parent then it was worth it. We all can do our part all these kids are wanting is to matter, to be loved, to know they are important. So many different ways to be able to interact with these kids that are just longing for a hug or just to hear you matter.
So on this Christmas day, no matter the struggles we have endured, things we are going through know there are youngens that need you! Time is so valued by them and free from us. Reach out, you matter!
