DollyDisaster's blog: "Broken Again"

I cant believe Im letting a guy nake me cry like this.. WTF! You let someone in, you introduce me to your friends, you tell me that I mean the world to you and that Im ithe best thing thats happened to you in a LONG time and then THIS? I dont understand. Im so fucking hurt and upset right now that I dont know what to say..I get no call, no text no nothing! I think thats got to be the worst part of the whole thing..Not knowing.. As far as I knew, everything was fine..All I ask is for honesty.. Is that too hard? It sucks when you think you are starting to fall for someone that you think feels the same way and then BAM!!! Maybe you didnt have a clue at all.. I feel like the biggest fucking asshole right now.. I guess the bigger the smiles were on my face, the more tears would flow when it all comes crashing down. Men should come with a warning sign that says I WILL BREAK YOU! Cause thats exactly how I feel right now.. Broken

Use me Keep me bruised and broken Never be the same Scratched & Bloodied Words Unspoken never once complained Dirty, Filthy on the floor Bruised up knees begging for more

Do you ever put yourself in a situation and then you wonder how the fuck you wound up there in the first place? Well, Im sitting here thinking that exact thought, The crazy thing is...... I know exactly how I wound up where I am right now..... .. In my head right now Im thinking.... I miss him..Who's going to care about me the way you did? All my faults and my flaws you embraced... I never felt so comfortable with someone enough to just let them in... I let my guard down and poured our my heart.. You gave me your shoulder to cry on, and when you held me on your bed in your arms, I felt safe for the first time ever Thats why Im in the position that Im in... Those are the thoughts that make me say, Im sorry After all the hurtful words, after all the broken promises, and after all the tears, I let you back in..... Nothing ever changes, your just like my father... The man that hurt me the most in my life..The man that I used to try to please no matter how much he tried to break me... Until one day I cracked... I stopped trying to please him.... I knew that Id never be the little girl that he always dreamed of... Daddys little girl I always wanted to be but never was... And here you are making me feel like that little girl all over again..... The girl I swore Id never be again... I let you break me... I let you make me cry... and then I let you do it all over again....