Nightmares again. I've barely slept.
I stare at the bottle of pills and wonder how much money I wasted on them. I'm half delerious, almost manic in my recounting of every item on that reciept. It's amazing I can remember it now, but it's all I can remember now.
Sleep didn't come, I want to know what I'm owed. Sleep didn't stay, I want to take what I'm owed.
I'm in the shower. I don't know how I got here. The water's cold, so I must've been here a while. I wonder how long I've been sitting here, and why I didn't take my clothes off.
More laundry soap, and I wonder if I have anything to wear.
more laundry soap and I don't have a thing to wear.
I'm sitting on my washing machine, listening to the drier. I wonder if this is the second or third time I've started it empty.
Sitting on the washing machine that's been finished for a while, I wonder if I washed those once or twice.
I pull my laundry out and they're just about dry anyway, so I get dressed. It's hot today, but my clothes are cool and soothing. I think I burned myself in the shower, I don't know, maybe.
More painkillers for my aches, how many today?
More painkillers for my aches, too many today.
It's night now and I don't know where I am, the lights are all off and I can hear the sound of a radio. My radio but it feels far away. Maybe I just left the sound down. Maybe I should get my head out from under the pillow.
I'm in bed again and I don't know how I got here.
Maybe sleep will come tonight, maybe without the nightmares. Maybe it'll be better tomorrow.
Maybe not.
