before I start I am not a superficial person really I am not. but some things.....
I was at the laundrymat last night trying to get my laundry done and was texting a friend the attendant I have met before and is a little crazy but not the scary crazy kind. she greeted me and I said hello and that was that. then a guy came in and the attendant and him started to talk. this guy was at least a half foot shorter than me and like a quarter my size small guy. well he tried to engage me in conversation. I politely answered his questions in the shortest way possible while I continued to text this friend I like. this guy them starts talking to the attendant then who decided to sit next to me. so I was sandwiched between the two and now they are BOTH trying to engage me in conversation...I continue my back and forth texting and give them as short of answers as possible. when they start talking about all their health problems...I was not really paying attention. when this guy says "well the only thing I know works is my dick" ok I kind of lost it I said "WHOA! ok I just found out more about a complete stranger than I wished to know, I don't even know your name, but apparently your dick works..." to which he replies "I'm steve" *head desk* ok wrong answer buddy. well the rest of the time he was there he was hitting on me. by tell me what his nick name is...I'll tell you this in the list at the bottom. and right before he left he says to me..."well it was nice talking to you...you know where I work if you ever want to stop by and say hi" I am now going to list all the reasons this man did not have the slightest chance in hell
1. no tact...no sense of what is appropriate in public and what is not
2. he's scrawny...I could lose this guy in my belly button...hell no that's not a turn on!
3. he's in his late 30's and he is a pizza driver. yeah I want to upgrade my current situation not downgrade.
4. and finally his nick name is SCROTUM!! yeah genius I have spent my entire life aspireing to be scrotums wife I DON'T FUCKING THINK SO!!!!!!
ahhh feels good to get that off my chest
