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You know you're Italian when you... 1. Were raised with Nutella and Panettone for breakfast
2. Have thick gold rings, bracelets, and gold chains with a cross
3. Have a pissed off look on your face all the time
4. Have a least two Cadillac's in the famiglia
5. Only eat quality food…if pasta is not al dente you yell, "che schifo!"
6. Still get a Perugina egg for Easter
7. Talk with your hands naturally…ooooo…eeeyyy…"ma che fai?"
8. Know the corner piece of lasagna and the end piece of bread is the best part
9. Know that tiramisu is made with mascarpone not cream cheese
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10. Know that if you're gonna do something, do it the Italian way
11. Have a cross in your room above the bed
12. Have a Maria, a Salvatore, a Tony, and a Vito in the family
13. Love Madonna's old school music
14. Do the Chicken Dance and the Tarantella at weddings even if you can't dance
15. Eat a panino with prosciutto once a week
16. Find yourself cursing out people who aren't Italian, in Italian
17. Know Italian girls all had the chichio Bella doll when they were little
18. Know Gino's and Gina's, watched topo gigio, know pasta is spaghetti and prosciutto is ham
19. Have an Italian flag sticker on the back on your car
20. DiNiro, Pesce, Pacino. And Sorvino are your favorite actors. Scorsese films and the Godfather Trilogy, Goodfellas, Analyze that are your favorite films
21. Your last name ends with an A,E,I, or O with few exceptions
22. Favorite color is black because it goes best with gold
23. You own something from Versace, Armani, Gucci, Fendi, or Valentino, and if not, love their lines.
24. Have never had Prego or Ragu but when you see the ads you vomit
25. When you were bad, were hit with a cucchiarella by your momma or nonna
26. Your 6'4", can bench press 325 pounds, shave twice a day, but you still cry when your mother yells at you
27. Carry your lunch in a Safeway produce bag because you can't fit 2 mortadella sandwiches, 4 oranges, 3 bananas, and a bottle of vino into a regular paper lunch bag
28. Your father owns 5 houses, has $300,000 in the bank, but still drives a '76 Monte Carlo
29. You share your bathroom with your 5 brothers, have no money, but drive $45,000 Camaro
30. Your Mechanic, Plumber, Electrician, Accountant, and Travel Agent are all blood relatives
31. Consider dunking those "S" shaped cookies in milk a nutritious breakfast |
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