Dear CherryTAP "Show Me Your Panties" Folks,
I do not wish to show you my panties or any other intimates I may or may not possess. I know, deep down inside, if I only knew how cool/sexy/nice/blah blah blah you really are, I'd gladly show you my panties and the like, but since I'm a horrible person with no desire to dig that deeply, we're at an impasse.
Here's what you need to know about my panties:
1. They're mine.
2. No, dude, I'm serious. They're actually mine.
3. They come into direct contact with my bottom.
4. They come in a variety of colors and styles, which you, being the industrious individual that you are, can find online or at a store near you.
5. In the event that you're as weird/icky as I assume you are, I suppose you can have them after I've no further use for 'em.
6. You now know all that you need to know about my panties.
If you have not asked about my panties, you may feel free to ignore this diatribe. That is all. You may go now.
