I could feel the cold of the steel as the knife was pulled across my neck. The oozing blood from the deep gash send rivulets of warmth running don over my chest. I closed my eyes in fear, knowing that I was feeling my life slowly slipping away from me as I laid there. I knew not who had done this and yet I sensed a closeness to them. As I slowly took each breath I heard the gurgling sound in my throat. I knew the wound had been cut deep and it was matter of time before I would succumb to my calling. My only hope now was that I would not lay there and be made to suffer, praying the end would come quickly. Seconds ticked slowly by, listening to them as my heartbeat grew fainter.
I closed my eyes tightly as a light appeared there in front of me. I watched as a door opened and light beams flowed through. Suddenly a man appeared, standing in the doorway, staring straight me as I laid there. I could not move any longer, transfixed as if held by some unseen force. I watched as he slowly walked towards me with his hand stretched out for mine. Uncontrolled I raised my trembling hand to greet this man. A warmth filled me as my hand slid into his. I knew he was not there to hurt me but to guide me in this time of need. I laid there in a deep red pool of blood now seeping into the sheets of my bed. I thought of the loved ones that had gathered to be with me as my time on earth came to a close.
I was loved and thankful for all the memories that I had been able to collect in the many years that had passed me by. I felt a lightness come over me as I was lifted from my bed. I was now in the arms of this stranger as he turned and walked back towards the door. All around me was so bright and pure as I looked up into his eyes. He saw the worry on my face and quickly said, “I assure you you have nothing to fear any longer. You are now amongst your ancestors and friends that have came here before you. I looked up at him and I saw his confidence in that he spoke the truth. I slowly let all my pain and anger seep from me. I watched the door open for us and together we stepped inside, leaving the world behind us. There was no place for me in that world anymore, having lived the days that were to be my life.
I heard the door close behind us then the rejoicing of angelic voices as I was brought into their fold. All around me looked so pure and unblemished. I turned to look for the guide that had accompanied me on this trip, only to find that he was no longer near me. This was a different trip that I would be asked to undertake and one that would last me for eternity. There would be no ending as their was no true beginning as nothing would be asked or expected of me. The comfort and calmness I now felt was unexplainable and yet I accepted it without question. I walked back to the door and opened it, looking back at the body I had left behind. Laying there looking so peaceful, knowing that soon loved ones would accompany it to its final resting place. I could see the tears that flowed from their eyes as they gathered by my side, each saying their good-byes in their own way.
There was no leaving my new home nor did I want to. I accepted the events as they had unfolded, blaming no one. I wondered why it had happened to me and yet I was not angry for it happening. This was meant to be my life and I had lived it to the very end the way I had wanted. I could feel a warmth close in around me. The same comfort I had felt when I had been held in the arms of my loving mother when I was first born. The security and closeness told me I had nothing to fear as these arms would protect me. I heard the faint whisper of a voice that I recognized having heard it many times before Closer and closer it came to me as I laid there wondering if this could possibly be. I closed my eyes tighter now as I was in fear that it was hoax. Then I heard it right there beside me. I opened my eyes, looking up into those same eyes that had looked down on me when I was born. I was held in her arms now as she said over and over again, “Wake up you are having a bad dream.” I awoke slowly, cradled in the soft arms of my mother as she comforted me this night.
© Tall Mountain Dreamer October 14, 2007
