wow i really thought i knew you or maybe your grandma was right you are influenced by other people because your different... im different too but the difference is i dont let people make my decisions for me i loved you with all my heart and no matter how much friends of mine didnt like you because i was always with you instead of them when i told them that i found mr right they backed off they werent gonna stand by and break us up or even try i was willing to let people go to be with you i was going to commit myself to you forever i realize i was your first for everything which i knew i was your first at a thing or two but not everything. i loved you more than life itself and what do i get for tha? a knife through the heart. i feel like the last few days was a total lie. i asked you to be honest ,, thats all i asked for your honesty weather it would hurt me or not. i didnt want you to be fake not at all.. were we a lie or did i just lose to your so called friends that couldnt live with the fact that we were once happy... i will never hate mitch but the other i can honestly say wasnt a true friend and you know why ....and why all this happened because renee liked you so her and nicole and billy tried to break us up well i hope you are happy about that . i never loved anyone as much as i loved you noone and people said hes a jerk and a asshole and i defended you after you hurt me because i thought you were a good guy and you own family didnt think you were like this but know this you hurt the one person that put you on top of the world you wwere my world... you made me feel like a princess and i am truly hurt that you feel you have to do what others want you to do just to fit in.. i really am sorry for that... i just wish you can one day find someone who is willing to do the things for you that i did and love you for the real you and the little things you do the retarded little things that made me happy.... and thank you for giving me that chapter of happiness in my life i broke down once more and i let my wall down thank you for showing me no matter what to keep it up ... even though you hurt me its not myself i feel sorry for its you.
your first for everything
amanda
