SH's blog: "...."

So I have a brother who is 2 yrs older then me name Ricky . Unfortunately cancer killed him at age 11.  He died on January 30th 1990 . End of January has always been hard on my family. Theses last couple of days I have been depressed more then ever around this . I was 9 yrs old when he dead . I remember That day all so well. Getting ready that morning for school and we could hear my brother fighting to breathe. They sent rest of us to school on the was way to bus stop we saw the ambulance going to the house. I remember the teacher at the school who pulled me and my sister out of class to go home. Walking into the house you could feel death was there. I kept begging my mom to take me back to school . I remember I fought with Ricky all the time. I wasn’t close to him like he was close to my other sisters and brothers . But I know he loved me , my mom has pictures of him hugging me I do mean lots of them . I always wonder if he never had cancer what kind of guy he would of been, he loved football biggest Baylor fan ever .  Five days before he passed it was mom birthday he begged to baby sit me my lil sis and lil brother . So mom could go out with my dad for her birthday. That was her birthday present from him . ... I remember one time he got into trouble and mom was going to spank him he had her chasing him around the house we lived in it was the funniest thing ever ,we still laugh about it . I sure do miss my brother. We both are the middle children’. Ricky will always be in our hearts . Now I will end this cause am crying to much ... love you brother your lil sis Sarah 

when i was 3 years old  was kidnap by our neighbor's kids .  They had me locked in a closet where they took a pipe wrench and a hammer to me i was beaten very bad by them. they also sprayed bug spray on me . lucky my older sister heard me screaming for my life and found me . these boys that kidnap me was only 7 and 8 yrs old . i still have scars and on my head i have soft spot where they hit me so hard. . those boys today are dead . they end up in prison  and few years ago they got killed in prison.  i still have nightmares of being attack like this.  i felt i should write about it since its been bugging me that it wont go away. its in the past but yet i still dream and think about it. .........