Pinhead's blog: "this is sum funny shyt!!!!"

He said .. . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said . . . You wear pants don't you? He said . . ..... Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart! He said . .. What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? She said . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror! He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? She said .. We don't know; it has never happened. He said . . Why is it difficult to find women who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking? She said ...... . They already have boyfriends. She said...What do you call a women who knows where her husband is every night? He said . . . A widow. He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women? She said . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

A husband and wife are watching "Who Wants To Be a Millionaire," and the husband winks and says, "Honey, let's go upstairs..." The wife says no, so the husband asks again. Again she says no. So the husband says, "Is that your final answer?" The wife says yes. The husband says, "Well, can I phone a friend?"

A gorgeous redhead goes into the doctor's office and says her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible" says the doctor. "Show me." The redhead takes her finger, pushes on her left breast and screams. then she pushes on her elbow and screams in even more agony. She pushes her knee and screams, then she pushes on her thigh and more screaming. Pushes her ankle, more screams and everywhere she touches makes her scream. The Doctor says, "You're not really a redhead are you" "Well, no", she says. "I'm actually a blonde." "I thought so," the doctor says, "Your finger is broken."

An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow". The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained: "Well, doc, it's like this, first I tried with my right hand but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing". The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbour?" The old man replied, "Yep. None of us could get the jar open."

The next time u r having a bad day, picture this: u r a siamese twin connected at the side. Your brother is gay, u r not. He has a date coming over tonight. U only have one ass.